When will they say they care genuinely and not only because it’s convenient?
If they don’t see your worth, leave.
Been told that before but I’m stuck here anyway. Someone just told me that I am being paid less than what I should be. Didn’t think of it before but now I could never agree less. Is it wrong to keep doing this even though my income does not worth all the exhaustion and sacrifices I make?
I’m fucked up, I can only smile at this one. I just want to let all this out. I want to complain but I’m too much of a ***** and my mind’s telling me to just go with it bec they’ll know somehow that I deserve more.
Im just too tired
I’ll never, never gonna be able to do that to you. I may joke about it some times or try to make an attempt to do it but honestly I’ll never. Even though you said it’s normal in a relationship, I still don’t know. I hate myself for thinking like this. I should be a bit rational about this and think like hey this is normal couples do this they trust each other blah blah. I still think it’s not nice. I may joke about the human genitals but I’ll never ask for someone to take a pic of theirs and send it to me. Or maybe I’m just all talks for now and a little later in life I might do it. But that will be entirely up to a lot more mature and adult me. I don’t even know why I’m crying right now. I don’t know if it is because she made you do that or you let yourself do that. But most of it, I think it’s because I’m disappointed with myself. Why? I don’t know. I really don’t know. And no matter how much I try to look at it differently or try to think of some rational thoughts, I still think the same. Fuck me.
I’m mad. I’m mad because she made you do that. Or I’m mad at myself for being mad because of that. I honestly, tremendously don’t know.
God, help me?
I just conquered that one fear I always had. The fear of opening up completely to someone. I just told someone that I like him and that I would want us to give it a shot. And it felt good. I never knew this feeling actually exists.
And when he told me that he actually loves me, man was it heaven. I knew somewhere deep in my subconscious, fear is creeping in. But fuck it, I want to give this a try.
When do you think you’re not capable of love anymore?
Man I’m just so fucked up and tired and hopeless and nothing seems to fucking matter anymore. When will this fucking tiredness gonna end?
I’m just so fucking tired.
I’ve been wondering if you guys share this site to some of your friends? Or maybe not friends, but those who you think are in need of a site like this?
I have a friend, I told her about this and I think she’s here. I feel like I shouldn’t have told her, this site is just so special for me. That’s why I promised myself I’ll never gonna tell anyone about this anymore. It just feels good that somehow I know something that they don’t.
Do you guys think the same?
I know listening out for other people’s dreams is boring but hear me out.
Last night I had the worst night. I stayed up at the veranda for hours contemplating about suicide because I can’t keep up with the people in the house. It’s too suffocating. Everywhere I go there’s just too many life. And I don’t want any life. My mom and I had been in a cold argument and I just can’t stand her seeing me and me seeing her.
I went to bed without eating and turned off my phone and blocked any notifications. Wishing I’ll never wake up. Maybe it’s this feeling that made me dreamed what I dreamt.
I was in this house, a stranger’s house and I was in a queue or something. People, including me, are lined up to the entrance of the house for I don’t know reason. And when it was my turn to enter, I found out why. There was a girl and she was about to commit. And I don’t know why we’re lining up, maybe to say goodbye? Or just to see how pathetic she was for the last time? But I got the chance to talk to her. And she seemed okay. She was smiling and we were holding hands like we’re some old friends meeting again for a long time. And just like any dreams, I cant remember what we talked about but we were laughing. The only thing I remember is her saying “thank you” or probably something like that. And when I was about to go out of the room she took my hand again and said, “I don’t want my last words to be thank you.” I don’t know what I did but the last thing I remember is that I left her in the room, she took a photo and then she killed herself. It was me she last talked to.
When I woke up, I didn’t know what to feel. But now, I’m crying and I’m scared. I know I don’t need to do something but if that was my subconscious telling me something then maybe I should be really afraid. I don’t know, I just don’t know anymore.
I had always wanted
To have a life widely fed
Sewn by my own kind of thread
But that was then
The life I’ve always dreamt
Has come to an end
Do you guys know any website or platform that lets you talk with someone you don’t know, and just talk. Not flirting or anything.
I need it. Thank you.
The very reason why I don’t like sharing and opening up to others is that they will only gonna say that one statement I’ve been hearing a lot like a mantra, “it’s just you and your paranoia. ”
What they don’t know is that it has never been JUST me and JUST my paranoia. What they don’t know is that I have NEVER chosen this. I didn’t want to be alone, I didn’t want to be eaten up by depression and I didn’t want to shut myself out from the world.
I NEVER CHOSE THIS.
I didn’t want any of this.
But they’ll never know because I didn’t want to hear that mantra anymore.
I’ve been fantasizing death for a while now but the most ironic thing is that I don’t really want to be dead. Like yes I think I’m a hopeless person and that people will only see my worth once I’m dead, but I’ve never planned any suicidal acts. Can this still be called “suicidal”?
I have a friend who is the same, we’re both very hopeless and depressed but we punch each other’s faces if we ever talk about doing suicidal acts.
Idk if this is normal and I really want to know if someone else feels the same way.
sometimes I wonder, will my life get any better? Will my days get any brighter? Will my being get any hopeful?
I just feel like I’m losing it, every ounce of hope this world can give me. And it sucks, my rational mind fighting over my suicidal one and I don’t know where to listen to.
Can this be real, can all of this be real?
I’ve been crying for days now, alone and stuck in my room without wanting to eat or have any human interaction. I don’t feel like a normal person anymore, I don’t know I’m just confused and hopeless.
I’m on the stage of my life where all I feel is sickness. Sick of having to walk on the same path over and over again. Sick of having to do things I’m forced to do. Sick of having to meet people who are fake. I’m so sick of it all. Would I get the remedy I deserve?
So I’ve been reading famous last words of famous people like Kennedy and the likes.
And lately I’ve been wondering what my last words will be like and if someone will care enough to remember.
Maybe none. Maybe mine will just float up to the atmosphere like a gas, insignificant and pointless. Just like my life.