I knew it was gonna come to this. I lost it all. Well I’m gonna go quick and easy either memorial day or D-Day. I love you Kristen. I always have. I always will.
imsorrymom
I was a 1 year survivor. Now I’m relapsing. I’m not gonna make it out of this. I’m sorry Kristen
i had to delay my last attempt to a later date because it was too close to my love of my lifes birthday and i couldnt ruin it forever so now i close in on my final days. i will gas up my car and take 1 loaded handgun. i will drive 12 hours to my final resting place. thne i will finally be happy. i wish it didnt come to this but it did. i love you L.R.A. i will forever. i will always be with you in heart. good luck to you all on here. i hope u guys get better. this will […]
well. here it is. im gunning (pun intended) for july 4. but it might be too close to the birthday of my friend/the girl i love. if not i will probably go for a later date in july. well. im sorry to all who tried to help me. in the end i knew i would fail you all. just like i always have. ill try to keep posting something up to my final moments. im sorry everyone.. but i have decided permently to commit suicide by firearm very soon. but now ill at least be finally happy…
me and my grandfather will both be dead in a couple of months. He will die of cancer. I will die of Depression. I never talked to him alot but i went to a gathering to pay respects and at one point everyone left the area except me and him. We ended up in the same room at one point and i remember thinking, me and him are the only one staring death in the face and no one else can see it yet. But we didnt say a word to each other. We just acknoledged that we would be both in the same place soon. Now […]
i havent posted on here in awhile. its because i didnt know what to say. now i do. im going to commit suicide by the end of 2010.. im sorry K.T.. i love you…….
Well, i felt the need to tell you people about myself a little because ive only been posting my stories. so here it goes:
im a male. First found out i was suicidal at the age of 14. looked up more about it later on and found out i suffer from major depression and suicidal thoughts. ever since 14 its been a steady decline in my positive mo0d and happiness. i now am 16 and very depressed and extreamly suicidal. i know im going to commit suicide. there is no doubt about that. the only question is to either do it at 16 or 17. lately […]
i cant sleep. i know its the depression and suicidal thougths. it happened the last time. its a warning that im getting really bad. its horrible. i feel like a damn zombie. but at least im not hallucinating. It only happens when im really, really bad and pretty much only lasted two days leading up to my first attempt. I know i havent told my story yet and im sorry about that. you have to understand though, the last person (and only person) i told turned their back on me and pretty much laughed in my face about me killing myself. it was my closest […]
1. there is no way i am getting rid of my guns (i have multiple, two pistols “glock 19 and .22lr”, an Assault Rifle “AK47″, and a sniper rifle”Remington 700”.) Â chances are that i would shoot my self with either the glock (less mess) or the AK47 (my most prized possession, its like a child to me) 2. there is no damn way im getting hospitalized cause i will be totally judged and i would not be able to join the army in 1 year if i decide to live after. 3. i have no medicine, i only told one friend and they dont take […]
“Suicide is a game that you dont win, you just decide when to lose” – R.M.
i have a question to those online right now or who ever. if i am really really depressed and want to kill myself about every minute of every day, how do i reverse that? lately i just dont think im going to make it to august. Lately i actually want to die. no “real” hesitations, just looking in the past for clues where i went wrong.
P.S. If any of you noticed, i am new here so sorry if i suck at it or i put crap that dosent make sense.
and i dont feel safe anymore. tomorrows the last day i will wear that yellow ribbon for suicide awareness. it was a shield. against my gun. now im alone. again. im feel sad again. i cry. icry i cry i cry. my mom will cry. they will wear black at my funeral. i have til the end of the summer to turn my life around with pure luck or they will wear black to a closed casket. i still cry though. i temp myself by putting my gun to my head. loaded, cocked, ready. finger on trigger. but i dont pull. i just need to […]