First time: February 2. It was after my therapy session.
I felt like nothing was getting better, I was just getting
more and more depressed. I felt that life no longer had a
meaning so I went to the station and I sat on the platform
for 2 hours just waiting for the courage to jump in front
of a train. I sat there crying and just praying that I
could just jump. But I couldn’t, I was thinking about my
parents and how unfair it would be, for them to lose their
only daughter. So I walked home, proud and so disappointed
at the same time. My heart won this […]
Katte
Katte
You destroy me unconscious but it feels like you're doing it deliberately sometimes. Someday we will meet it, what we both wanted to forget, the emotional pain.
In 6 days I am going to London with my father. In 14 days I’ll be dead. Going to London before i die is the only thing I’ve ever wanted.
I’ve always known that I’d end my life at the age of 17 at first i wasn’t sure, maybe I could hang on a bit longer. But now I am going to London and cant see why i should wait any longer. I know that my parents know that the end for me is near and i hope they will find peace after my death, that’s all i wish for them to have. Without me there will be no pain and no worries. I […]
He threw me away when i was 13.
I was so happy, I’d wanted it for years.
But he left me broken.
The wounds are left wide open.
Stitch them up?
No idea, there will be new tomorrow.
Come heal me?
Don’t think about it I’ll soon be gone.
My dad called me a freak today.
He screamed because i failed math.
He threw a glass at me, shame he missed.
Maybe he could cut me up?
Let me meet my love.
Why’s everyone holding me back?
I want back to my safe world.
This is my first post ever so i don’t know if it’ll be fucked up but anyhow I’ll just go for it. I self-harmed for 2 years, I haven’t cut or burned myself for 4 months now, but everyday is a struggle. I even dream about cutting myself, I have this craving. It was my safety, to cut myself and now I cant do it anymore and it hurts so bad. I know it’s for my own good, but I just don’t understand why I can’t do it when it made me feel so good? I go to DBT (Dialectical behavior therapy) twice a week […]