I’ve made a poison. Now, I’ve done this before, but never one THIS poisonous. Even inhaling it is dangerous. I’ve decided I’m going to do it. I’m going to commit suicide. And I’m using the poison I like to call ‘Black Venom‘
I’ll shoot this gun and make a bullet wound.
If you move I’ll Fire and blood will be everywhere.
Don’t move or I’ll do it. I’ll do it.
Move, I dare you. I dare you, I do.
Silence is my insanity,
Mother, Mother, stop beating me.
Silence is my laughter,
Father, Father, don’t slaughter her.
We all make mistakes, We all make mistakes,
Stop all this madness and remove all the breaks.
Silence is my sanity,
So why won’t it help me?
Everyone is connected in two ways. In life, and in death. I know what you’re thinking, I’m just a loner on the other side of this screen, no one to leave behind when I die, a not-so-happy soul, when in fact, I’m the person everyone turns to when they have problems. I’m always cheery and happy and I honestly don’t think anyone can help that..My Mum says I’m the nicest person on earth. She said yesterday that she’s glad I don’t cut or have suicidal thoughts, and when I looked at the Television, which was what she was watching, I almost gasped and fell to my knees crying.
My friend had introduced me to someone a week earlier, no one particularly interesting and no one I’d want to be friends with, but I showed him kindness and helped him whenever he asked me to. Being the person I am, I was happy to help. I never complain, never groan when Mum asks me to do the laundry or wash the dishes or run to the store, so I helped everyone anyway I could. But, he had asked me one particular question that set my heart and courage on edge, “Can you help me kill myself..?” I stared at him, wide eyed, for a moment. Then he repeated the question, “Can you help me kill myself?” This time, it was a bit more demanding. I rejected him and gave him this website in order for him to cope with his thoughts, but, now I was staring at his school photo on the screen, his name across the bottom of the screen in pixels that held no emotion, but I did. I held emotion. I held the sorrow for his soul. I cried all through last night, because of someone I had just met and had only talked to once or twice all on the same day..then I thought about what would happen if my sis or someone close to me killed themselves.
I’d end my life too.