i don’t feel the need to use this site anymore. how do i delete it?
ohboyohboy
my 16th birthday passed a month ago. im still alive, i haven’t had motivation to do anything to myself, my grades are going buckwild and the only thing im doing well in is art. and go figure, because that’s all i really care about! and it’s just been so long, you know? it’s been 16 years and for at least 4 of them i have felt like shit and i have never meant anything to anyone, im just there because it’s convenient. i mean nothing and i can’t keep doing this. i can’t live like this. i don’t know what to do and im just […]
a major goal for 2018 is to die.
if that doesn’t work, then the next best step (i guess) is to get help.
and as it turns out, living is not the problem right now. being alive is not what is wrong. what is wrong is that life still has me here, existing, fucking things up and saying the wrong things. not doing what i need to. keeping myself locked away.
it turns out i am the problem, and that is why i need to die as soon as possible. that is why my 2018 goal is just to stop. just to stop fucking existing and stop being […]
i was and am and always will be a terrible friend. so you know, the only logical way to make sure i actually don’t hurt anyone else is by killing myself. asap. i tried to take another painkiller today and u know what! it didn’t work and i’m saving my fucking Midol for the day i can successfully swallow pills without extra panic because it said 12+ is dangerous and i still have like 17 so maybe. maybe one day it will happen. and it’ll all be over and i won’t have to worry about anything ever again because i won’t exist and just god […]
i just thought about my plan of dying before reaching 20 and how weird it is and also maybe how dumb it is. it seems far away but it’s only 5 years away and yeah i wanna fucking die every day, i’ve continuously thought of stopping in front of cars on the way to and from school (i haven’t done it yet so i guess that’s good but also bad), but isn’t it irratioinal? to fully plan this out? i can’t go through with the plan but if this were just an impulse thing, then it’d be easier. i don’t know what i’m trying to […]
every day! it’s just me wishing i would die! but it never happens askdjhiwfb i just want to fucking dieee NOW RIgHT NOW PLEASE please please
im trying to do the 100 days project and it was a real success at first and i was barely having any bad thoughts and i was so READY to see day 100 and pass it and maybe even see day 200. but now i don’t know if i’ll even see day 50. im too young to be thinking like this. there’s so much i could be looking forward to, but i just don’t want to see it. i don’t care how much it’ll hurt everyone. i just want to finish this.