Can anyone tell me what a soul mate really is? I’ve been praying for signs that could point out if he’s the one that God had sent. But I can’t figure out if those signs were God’s. I’m an overthinker. So…there might be some kind of coincidences…my imagination or some sort of other factor that mixed along with the signs. How would I know if he’s the one?
I was a bit sceptical about this site at first. Then I read every post and thought to myself that I’m not alone. I was desperate to fix everything. I was hurt to see others hurt. I tried my best to help them and in the mean time I struggle with own troubles. I HATE to say this…but I HATE that particular person. And I HATE myself for hating her. I hate that I have to admit that I’m weak….I’m insecure. I hate everything. I live for years coping with anxiety and depression.
I met with several counsellors in my life. Now I’m 20 years old and this annoying mental illness just got worse by time. I don’t see any significant reason for me to stay. I just want to die. But then I read a post related to her loss. I think twice of committing suicide.
It’s just that…I’m not loved. There’s always better person out there that cherishes life and he/she can take a good care of those whom I loved. They bring more happiness than I am. I feel so left out. I started as an overachiever but it didn’t last. I lost to anxiety and depression. I was ashamed of myself. I just want to die. But I’m not a coward. I have to push myself. I feel nothing. It’s just numb. I don’t feel things that once I felt. I hate that I can’t do anything sometimes….I just sit on the corner. Contemplating my whole life. I look back what I’ve done that’s just useless.
I forgot how does not feels like. Can someone out there convince to just put myself back on track….?