I LOVED YOU…
YOU HURT ME!
My name is Samantha and I'm 16 years old. I've been a cutter since I was 14. I really am a sweet caring girl. I just dont wanna be judged for the things I've done...
today has been such a bad day….
& i’ve decided that maybe this life just wasn’t made for me…
i can’t keep faking & pretending that there’s nothing wrong…
everything in my world is wrong..
i lost it all; my family, the love of my life, my heart, my soul,my will to make it through…
there’s nothing left to live for & in way im kinda grateful for what i had till he took it all away from me and left me alone here.
but, this burning pain is beyond overwhelming and the tears keep coming…
i ask myself where i went wrong along the way..
if you understand me then you have […]
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there used to be a time when the world around me seemed so precious, so beautiful. i wanted to be part of the world that everyone else seemed to fit into. then it seemed that i wasn’t made for the good, easy life. haha i crashed pretty hard at top speed.
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i listen to each and everyone of you share a thought, a story. bringing up painful memoreies or unstoppable thoughts. i feel like though i have so much hurt and shit in my life, there are perople who get it.
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thank you.
I never thought I’d die alone
I laughed the loudest who’d have known
I traced the cord back to the wall
No wonder it was never plugged in at all
I took my time, I hurried up
The choice was mine, I didn’t think enough
I’m too depressed, to go on
You’ll be sorry when I’m gone
I never conquered, rarely came
Tomorrow holds such better days
Days when I could still feel alive
When I can’t wait to get outside
The world is wide, the time goes by
The tour is over I survived
And I can’t wait till I get home
To pass […]
so far i forgot how to be myself and i cant remember what i ever wanted outta life.
i cut myslef last night… it wouldnt stop bleeding and i admit that for once i was kinof afraid but comfortable with the thought od dying. i’d never have to be alone again and i could do things without worrying about everyone…
everything is FUCKEDUP.
i’ve learned to trust no one.
do i disgust you yet? do i make you sick to your stomach.
if i decided to ler go, would you care? would you acknowledge the fact that i did this and theres no turning back?
you make everything in life so hard.
i dont have to question my sanity simply because i know im not crazy.
just utterly misunderstood.
in your eyes im no one.
not a daughter. a sister. a friend, an enemy.
i’ll fake a smile for a little while longer and maybe once im gone, you’ll see i could’ve been worth it…
or maybe not…
everyday i look at myslef and tyhe scars i have. i’ve cut so deep and i loved the feeling. i am alone and all i have is myself. my dad died when i was 7, my family turned against me…..its like whats the point to live when theres nothing good to live for? i ask myslef why the hell am i still here. a 16 year old craving an escape from the pain…
since i was younger, I never felt good enough for anyone. I was always being made fun of and put down. I admit that I’m very sensetive. I couldn’t take it & I tried… I didnt succeed. When suicide just wasn’t working, cutting was my new thing. With every tear shed, a new cut formed. I was alone and empty. Had nobody to save me besides myself..I was destroying me & i didn’t care…Never have & never will I guess..doesn’t change anything..
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