I thought I was doing better. Today I could walk upright under a snake and have clearance, I feel that low! Do not know how I continue to keep going on? There is a hole in me that seems to not have a bottom. Have been told many a time, that I am one of the good ones, the proverbial nice guy. No matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to fill that hole, and it’s tearing me apart! The pills and firearms at my disposal, are calling my name. I have fought the battle with this sickness for over 30 years. I may […]
Vic03
I watched a movie last weekend and one of the last lines was, “don’t you ever get lonely”.
I just about yelled at the tv, EVERY FUCKING DAY!!!!
I did like the movie though…..
I have been suicidal for as long as I can remember. It comes in waves of severity, like a rising tide. The tide was very high in 2015 and about half of 16. For quite a few years before 14, the tide was at an all time low. The last part of 16, I was having some better days. The tide is rising again and I think it’s time to put my affairs in order. I think it is finally time to start documenting assets and get a will in order. These are things I should have done already since I am past mid 40’s. […]
I have been lurking in the shadows for a while. Have been reading and getting a feel for the site before making my first post. I am an attempt survivor and have regretted that success escaped me on many occasions! I have struggled with depression all of my life. Finally at 40, I was able to find a taste of happiness with an old flame. Everything was good for about a year of dating, so I decided to take the plunge and ask for her hand.
We were engaged after Thanksgiving of 2010, married in 11. Everything went south in early 12. Her daughter/ex did everything […]