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For general topics related to the site.

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The page was…”Helpful” but the hospitall wasnt.

June 24th, 2008by Massive139

I have tried to kill myself before. i was a stupid, screwed up kid. not for suicide. but for the failed attempts. if i had ended it all then and there, no one wold have gotten attached and i wouldnt have caused so much pain to those people whom love me in my life. there is another entry here that says that the person says that they are lucky to be a zero, that person indeed needs to consider, that i was nothing. and i tried to be nothing. being nothing is IMPOSSIBLE once it goes away. screwing up is not impossible but not EXISTING …

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i tried it didn’t work

June 23rd, 2008by jamalnasr

I was drinking with some friends major alcohol comsumption… it takes alot to overdose but i did.. My mother found me lying on the floor of my apartment bearly breathing . Went to the hospital when they checked me out they wanted to operate on me to change out my liver its almost done with . I told them no when they told of the results. I was luck to be alive. But I am in so much pain now I want to find the nearest gun blow my brains out. Unfortunity I can not leave to go any where now I’m stuck …

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What’s the point?

June 23rd, 2008by dbrog2

I fucked up my life. I am a big fat ZERO, I am nothing. I will jump soon. No one will know I am gone, and that makes me feel so good. I am so comfortable with this feeling. Zero begets nothing. A beautiful formula.
I love being zero. My comfort only comes when I tell myself that I am nothing. I smile because I know I am nothing, I have accepted it.
I wonder how many people that have blogged this site are no longer with us? Will it do the rest of us any good?

No.

see you all in hell.

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1

Looking for Home

June 22nd, 2008by dnsrnsn

When Ashley left me, I hit the lowest point in my life. I didn’t want to live anymore. I waited until my roommates were in bed and left my apartment. I walked in the dark with my head down and my heart beating at triple its normal rate, not caring where I went or if I came back. I didn’t know if I was depressed, angry, or just sad, but I hated everything. Mostly I hated myself.

It was cold outside, and I didn’t bring a coat, but that didn’t seem to matter. I just walked. The moon was …

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my love of life is gone

June 22nd, 2008by helpdave46

im a 46 yr male, have worked hard for my family for 26 yrs of marrage.At 42 I had a heart attack.ok i said ill take better care of myself.Well at 45 i had another and it scared the crap out of me.It caused me to go into depression.Now 2 months ago my wife left me a note that i found after comming home from work.It says shes tired of my attitude and wants a divorce.We have 3 children,one still is in our home,hes 18 and has some mental disabilities.Ilove my wife with all heart and soul.I have not seen her for a little …

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lonesome lingering

June 21st, 2008by jamalnasr

Hate, disspare, hidden traps, eyes maced, tears, mournings, nights, scars, all in witch lies , how do i share. All i live for …happiness? What am I to think? It comes with a price. You say…You would die for me..Look at our soldiers? Look at our friends..It comes with a price. I don’t know how much longer I will be here? But at least maybe theres someone out there that I can relate too, maybe 1 life, one day.. Before I do something supid…I’m tryin to talk about this…Whats crazy is I think life is ok sometimes? But when it …

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love of a lifetime loss

June 20th, 2008by MJ

For the past 18 years I have been depressed off and on. I am now 31. Never been married and I don’t have any children. I am actually pretty successful compared to my friends and relatives. 8 years ago, the love of my life passed away suddenly from a motorcycle accident. The pain– the pain– the pain. I hurt everyday. I don’t think that I can have a “normal” romantic relationship with anyone because I still love him. He was the love of my life. I never told him how I really felt. Nor have …

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Feeling Alone, Like A Failure And Hopeless

June 19th, 2008by Brandy

I’ve had feelings of suicide on and off for the past two years. I feel disconnected from my family and many so called “friends.” Right now I’m facing financial disaster. My rent isn’t paid, clients aren’t paying me on time and I feel like there is no love in my life. Last year my mother passed away suddenly. Then my brother tried to commit suicide. My Aunt died from a degenerative disease. This all happened within a few months. It’s been overwhelming. I’m an extremely talented writer and have won awards and praise for my work; …

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Why Hell Walks

June 18th, 2008by Under Pressure

I don’t understand the World much anymore. It’s fucked up, and everything bites. It’s like depression clings to everything. Why? I was hoping you could tell me. Even the people I care about look at me differently now. I can’t keep going… I Just want the pain to stop. No matter what I do, I always hurt people who care about me. What if I could stop that too? It would be so easy… So quick… And then all over… And yet I’m forced to keep going for some unknown reason. Why can’t I just stop? Is Satan punishing me or something? Everything is gone. …

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my hurt

June 17th, 2008by ma ree

i feel so empty inside. I cant believe I think of suicide. It started a few years ago. I dont want to die, i want to rid mself of my big black hole that has become my heart. i feel my life is not my own, it is not filled with continuity. there is no cohesion. i want this life to be over. to get another chance at happiness. i know there is no do-over, but i want one. i want to love and be loved back. the person i should love, i no longer do. alot of the time i hate this person. they …

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READ THIS, IF YOU CARE….

June 17th, 2008by Emily F

I’ve tried to commit suicide on 3 occasions, the first to was when I was 6 YEARS OLD, I tried to stab myself with a knife- my pereants were hitting each other and I was knocked down while trying to sepperate them, so I ran to my room, with a knife in my hands, thinking about pain and death and hid in my closet, the knife inched nearer and nearer to my neck, but I could not do it. I didn’t know what suicide was, all I knew was that it would all “end”.

The second time was when I WAS NINE, I was constantly bullied …

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My letter

June 17th, 2008by sla5af

Dear all,
When any of you has read this, I will be far gone. Most likely in downtown KL or somewhere nearby. Watching my final sunrise.

I can’t cope with the pain and the loss anymore. I don’t know how to describe how I feel. I really suck at talking, making friends, and everything. I hate being me.

I’m just tired of this life. I’m tired of having my old lives being wrenched away from me. Over and over again. Different parts of me is like scattered all over the world. I left a part of me behind every place I used to be. I’m …

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My Gift

June 16th, 2008by rabidrabbit

I have lived a dishonorable life. I have done dishonorable acts, and deeply hurt two different women. I have lived my life like a steamroller, destroying everything I have ever touched. I must destroy myself, for I will only continue to destroy everything in sight.

My death is my gift to all mankind.

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Tired of living

June 16th, 2008by johnw

I’m 22, I live with my parents, which makes me feel not very free. My father was a verbal-violent alcoholic before, thou he never hit a fly, and he still drinks which makes the ghosts on the house to reappear. So I wanna get the hell out of here, but I don’t have enough money to go by myself (I live in South America). I can’t find a way to live, I’m feeling from a homosexual to a loser and my mind is continuing killing myself with bad thoughts about me and another people. Life is shit, women are whores, my friends are great, but …

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Bah

June 16th, 2008by yutz

I’m in my mid-thirties, I’ve got a decent career, money in the bank, girlfriend, no major responsibilities other than getting my current projects in on time, no major health problems yet, yet I think of suicide almost daily.

Nothing feels good. I’ve got the trappings of a good life, but I get no reward from it, which magnifies the day-to-day obstacles and makes them a thousand times worse. Most people’s status quo is to be generally happy. It feels like my status quo is to be in a state of despair, or panic. Socialization doesn’t feel good. Work doesn’t feel good. I’ve started taking antidepressants, …

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MY DREEM IS NEAR why do i fear

June 13th, 2008by sexualoverdrive

babay im writing this to all and none as i search for the reason of my depression and my hate as my family has killed me off why should i wait i want to do the dirty deed but i cannot as i surely need the life i breath and the kiss i take your the one who keeps me awake im so lost in my deepression as i get all lost in life i hav elost my jkob my family and some friends i need to take some time and make amenze i wish to end it al my life my …

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Fight for life…

June 13th, 2008by faerie

It’s never easy to think of suicide as just to end your life. It’s more than just slitting your wrist, popping pills, poisoning by gas fumes or running over a cliff.

my entire life, i’ve been nothing but a huge scar. You see a sweet girl one day, then you start to see what sort of pain is really hiding inside of my heart.

I am very anemic and my heart is very weak. I couldn’t breathe sometimes due to post-traumatic stress. I had 3 blood transfusions in the past and one day may need heart surgery. But I lived with this torn heart.

I …

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If Anyone Cares…

June 13th, 2008by Irrel_Avant

Growing up I was really poor but I was always told, “You are going to be something great!”. School was so easy most of the time I felt like I wasn’t challenged enough. I have always been good at most things I try. Girls have always wanted to be with me. I’m smart, wise, artistic, good looking and athletic. I can do everything from paint portraits to fly a plane, all self-taught! I have a wonderful girlfriend who is everything I ever wanted in a girl. But I feel so lonely. So empty…. My heart hurts and I don’t know why. I feel like I …

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I’m Sorry

June 12th, 2008by pauldugan13

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY

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i made a mistake

June 11th, 2008by sad and trapped

i know so much. i know things that my boss did, that are wrong, but i have no proof, and his victims will not speak. i try so hard. all i want is to be a superhero and do the right thing i just want to live a life like in the comic books. to fight crime. i think that is how i will die, saving someone, because jesus said there is no greater act than to lay down your life for somone else. i am crying, i have a gun and i really want to use it on me. i want to die, …

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