General

For general topics related to the site.

4

hey

  January 5th, 2010 by asdf

GOD i want to express myself so much , but i just cant find the right fucking words …. ive been writting huge paragraphs and deleting them and starting over for bout and hour now … i want to express my feelings and my life thoroully but i cant put it fucking together ….

i read these stories below and those little paragraphs and i can really feel the pain these people have .. when i read what lives they have , and look at mine i feel like its a mistake writing here and that you guys will just think im a moron and that …

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6

a poem

  January 5th, 2010 by whiteylover

I’ve done the best i possibly can,
To try and make you understand.
But no one seems to really see,
That a certain something, is destroying me.

It’s something that engulfs your life,
Makes you want to pick up a knife.
Its something that takes away your faith,
And makes you feel so unsafe.

I’m not sure how much more i can take,
Before i crumble, and before i break.
I managed to fight it by myself,
With a smile i pretended to be somebody else.
But its at the stage im losing hope,
I’m giving up, i cant seem to cope.

This thing is painfully ruining me,
Controlling my life happily.
Im not living – Im surviving,
And inside im slowly

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6

Ehhhhhhh.

  January 5th, 2010 by kaitlynsierra

I actually just found this website today, and I figured it seemed like a good idea to try. After reading some of the other posts though I feel a little intimidated, to be honest. I don’t really know what to write, so I guess I should start at the beginning.
When I was in fourth grade, my parents split up. They just weren’t happy anymore I guess. So my dad moved into his mother, my grandmother’s house, and my mom stayed at our house. They didn’t divorce, they were just having a “temporary situation”…I lived with my mom at our house with my older sister, and …

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5

Listen…

  January 5th, 2010 by takemefaraway

since i was younger, I never felt good enough for anyone. I was always being made fun of and put down. I admit that I’m very sensetive. I couldn’t take it & I tried… I didnt succeed. When suicide just wasn’t working, cutting was my new thing. With every tear shed, a new cut formed. I was alone and empty. Had nobody to save me besides myself..I was destroying me & i didn’t care…Never have & never will I guess..doesn’t change anything..

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7

I need someone to relate.. please.

  January 5th, 2010 by JordanJennifer

Look. I’m one screwed up almost-adult. In 14 days I will officially be in my twenties. I’ve had a sucky life and I’m not here to complain or rant about how my om did this and my dad did that but I’m writing this because I need someone to understand. Someone to talk to me. I need a friend. I don’t want to die.. well, this second anyway. But  usually do. My only best friend in the world wants to send me away. She doesn’t even understand and she always yells and gets angry. I need someone I can talk to who wants to listen. …

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0

please let God help you

  January 4th, 2010 by whydiebeforeyourtime@gmail.com

hey everyone.

i don’t have too much to say but i’ll start off by mentioning that this post isn’t at all for myself.

there are a lot of people who come to this site and write down their experiences/situations for others to read, but many of us here don’t really receive help.

the only way things fall away from goodness is because of a lack of God.   so basically what i’m trying to say is that if you really want to make your life and yourself better, you need Him, and you need Him more than just an hour a week.

if you’d like to talk about Him

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0

Stupid Girl

  January 4th, 2010 by erased_orion

Paradox

You’re both a death sentence

and my oxygen

Just like a tourniquet

when a bone is broken

A deadly medicine,

A toxic antidote

And the lullaby i’ve got memorized

down to the final note.

You picked me up from hell

and left me to die just there.

We both know you can save me,

but you just don’t really care.

You try and piece me slowly

and I break when you hold me,

but I’ll pretend I’m fine

because you alone are my lifeline.

(Inside, you make me want to die.)

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5

Please read this

  January 4th, 2010 by xSatanx

I was once just like any other person who comes to a site like this longing for death well that all changed and now i know what your thinking at this point o no not another Jesus freak or someone who is going to tell us that we shouldn’t feel this way any more well thats not what im here for so like i was saying it all changed when i had a child with a beautiful girl it was boy and he is the greatest thing that ever happened to me well i just found out a few days ago i have cancer its …

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2

obliterated, annihilated. just imagine.

  January 3rd, 2010 by somewhatdamaged

my family is so fucked up. i don’t feel like i belong anywhere.
i live alone… i’m so lonely.
everything is so much effort.
i hate the way i look. i hate the way people view me.
i hate feeling so undervalued and unappreciated.
i feel so marginalized and insignificant.
i think about dying almost every day now.
my friend said she would take my cat if i ever died; i asked.
i feel so unloved and unwanted.
i’m my exboyfriend’s backup plan, since he can’t find anything better.
i’m a joke to everyone.
i am so misunderstood and different.
i feel like my friends have abandoned me.. they can’t feel my pain.
i feel so alone.
i talk …

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5

Im lost in myself…

  January 3rd, 2010 by rampside-girl

I’m surprised I’m still here if I’m honest. Things haven’t exactly worked out very well, though reading some of these posts mine seems almost stupid..

I have some mental disorders, not yet diagnosed and after a year with no help and being disowned by my friends and family, i can no longer cope with it all.

Now, let me explain why they all disowned me, I see and hear things that are not there, I constantly fight with the voices and the drumming in my head, I cannot control what I do or say because someone controls me, I named him John, he hurts me and says nasty things …

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5

die

  January 3rd, 2010 by hopetodie

im 47 years old and my life sucks i hate my life i want to die soon planing on anding my life soon .the  sooner its over, the better it well be for me im doing before i turn 48

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1

  January 3rd, 2010 by z

Amazing I have made it this far. I hate where I am living, everyone is such a fucker I don’t care. They can truly go fuck themselves and I would be most happy. Everything I have put into this city, all the love I have tried to instill is lost. This world is full of selfish and inconsiderate people, that is the bottom line. So why should I continue? It would seem if I just faded and disappeared that would make the statement I wish: I don’t want to participate. I am not weak, just a dreamer incapable …

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4

You really don’t have a clue mom

  January 3rd, 2010 by forgotten.angel

Oh how there was so much you never knew about me.. and I lived right across the hall from you.. for 14 years.

Did you know that since 5th grade, I’ve been picked on and bullied just to come home to you and daddy butting heads?

You guys both angry not wanting to talk to me, ignoring me yet again?

Causing tention in the house?

Did you know that you never really showed me you loved me?

I mean sure you fed me and clothed me..

But I didn’t ask you too…

I just wanted love and attention.. from at least my family…

You’re supposed to support me.

Everyone picks my little …

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1

first story

  January 3rd, 2010 by beautifullybrokenx3

my life isnt the worst. not like most of the people here. its probably not even close. i used to think that i was in love but i was blinded . i never really felt what that was. but thats not the point. i cme across this website because i was angry upset and alone. today my older sister drove me and my other older sister and my cousin to the movies. it was okay we had a good time. on our way home i sat in the front seat. my sister is a careless driver. so she gets on the highway the speed limit …

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2

Nothing Is Always Something

  January 3rd, 2010 by princessTinker

ARE YOU INSANE?? HAVE YOU TOOK YOUR MEDS TODAY ?? NOOOOO cause if you did you would realize how beautiful you are how good you are at something or something about yoyu thats beautiful not at all saying that im perfect or better than anybody but i have a husband a 2 kids and they would be happy without me thier world would be so sad without me and thats for you 2 cause everyone of you are a son or a daughter a mother or a brother or a sister or a cousin or a grandma or a grandpa or sumthin

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0

please let me help you

  January 3rd, 2010 by whydiebeforeyourtime@gmail.com

hey everyone.

i don’t have too much to say but i’ll start off by mentioning that this post isn’t at all for myself.

there are a lot of people who come to this site and write down their experiences/situations for others to read, but many of us here don’t really receive help.

the only way things fall away from goodness is because of a lack of God.   so basically what i’m trying to say is that if you really want to make your life and yourself better, you need Him, and you need Him more than just an hour a week.

if you’d like to talk about Him

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2

Another self pitying ramble

  January 2nd, 2010 by N_C

I had no idea this kind of project existed. In the past I’ve come across ‘suicide deterrents’, usually the religious sort, but this is certainly a great way of getting these feelings out.
Writing for me, always helps, a little. Unfortunately it just never cures these feelings, because they always doggedly linger on. My life has been plagued by deep depression and anxiety – low self esteem – but frustratingly in the past two years I had hoped that it was behind me.
I’ve had a lot of input over the years (I’m 27 in Feb) since I was 15 in fact. I wouldn’t say it’s …

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1

  January 2nd, 2010 by fuckthis

Every fucking nite I ask the great useless allmighty to end my existance. but no such luck …. Sometimes I fucking wonder , I m so so so so so so  so times a trillion  sick of nothing but pain, what the fuck have I done to deserve this shit.

Fuck You you good for fuck all prick

Hell Must be more fun

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6

Real eyes. Realize. Real lies.

  January 2nd, 2010 by rose.

For the longest time, I felt alone, So alone. My boyfriend and I broke up, and I thought we would hate eachother, we didn’t talk for months. About 6 months ago, we started talking again. He became my best friend, still madly in love with him, things started to go my way. I thought I was flying, I felt amazing. Sex with him? .. No, But the simple holding hands, watching movies until we fall asleep on the couch, just the little things. He made me feel like I had a reason to be alive, like he needed me here, wanted me here, he made …

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3

Alone

  January 1st, 2010 by Idec

Just started high school few months ago i was excited of going to high school so excited, but not anymore since i moved to a different city. I thought it was gonna be great being with my friends and hopefully getting back with my ex-girl friend who would make me happy she had a nice personality, and really pretty she is everything i ever wanted. Out of all my girl friends i loved her so much i never actually knew how love felt and well now i know and i know how much it hurts and the other girls i dated i felt nothing

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