My Suicide Note

1

Unyielding Sorrow

  January 20th, 2014 by lilbird

Something akin to a smoker with no cigarettes

a junky with no junk

My soul is unsatiated, a hollow heart for a friend.

This pain is ongoing, unending, unyielding, unceasing

Carving away at an already empty vessel.

If this body could lie down and never awake

If this soul could fly up and out and on

Into the darkness

The vast darkness.

There is comfort in an enveloping never ending darkness

A place with no pain.

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4

???kontard’z

  January 20th, 2014 by YESCHUkrist

ME OPS????fed up with refelctional frens(acts like ur therpist of sleeps ell except u to set u  up with someobodi compley wrong for u)/karoolivigians(wutevre it is u like coming to suemthing …)… I JUST WISH I EXISTED IN SUMBD,IS HEART….

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1

My one, and only, post

  January 20th, 2014 by Silverbird

Since my ‘time’ has finally come, its only suitable that I contribute something back to this site after reading however many posts over the past few months. Months, that’s quite a long time from my perspective, when I don’t even remember what happened a few days ago (I’m sure it was the same nothingness that every day of my life is). In an attempt to not make this dwell on for too long I’ll try and cut it short…it is the internet after all:

TL;DR: Dead now, shotgun-to-backOfThroat

As far as my childhood goes, I had a few friends here and there, got upset relatively often (like …

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7

Christopher Mccandless aka Alexander Supertramp

  January 18th, 2014 by HealingInHisWings

Many of you guys have heard about this guy…  There was a book and movie written about him…  “Into the Wild”:

  • Christopher Johnson McCandless was an American hiker who adopted the alias Alexander Supertramp and ventured into the Alaskan wilderness in April 1992 with little food and equipment, hoping to live simply for a time in solitude. Wikipedia
    I admire this guy for who he was and for his ideals and adventurous spirit and relate to the guy.  If you haven’t heard of him, see the movie.  There are some lessons to be learned about self isolation and other things.
    He basically starved to death out there, supposedly

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7

Photograph

  January 17th, 2014 by __D__

I drank the last sip of wine, and set the bottle down. My medicine was failing me, my loved ones had failed me, and lastly, I had failed myself. Tonight was the night, I told myself. I had no desire to stick around any longer. I had only caused myself misery, and made everyone else’s lives complete shit. I was a heavy weight on everyone’s shoulders, a boulder, weighing down until I was dropped so suddenly to the ground. I looked at the fireplace and closed my eyes. I could hear yelling and screaming inside my head, visions of violence played out over and over …

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2

What do I do?

  January 16th, 2014 by lilynothingleft

I will start by saying I am confused, I’m a girl and I’m 12 years old. Until a couple weeks I lived in the country side with my father, my mother and him divorced when I was younger. I don’t have any siblings. I’m generally a happy child, wow I don’t think I’ve used the word happy in a while… 3 weeks ago my dad committed suicide. I was at school when I got pulled out of class. I don’t want to say how it happened it’s hard to think about. The problem is my life i was really close to my dad and I …

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3

HELLO, MY NAME IS

  January 16th, 2014 by HealingInHisWings

20130508-231359

 

 

 

 

Chris.  My email is cdgibson875 at  gmail…

If anyone needs someone to talk to, anyone at all…  I want to help.

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10

My Last Post

  January 15th, 2014 by kurdt kobian

I just wanna say that this website has helped me stay around this long and was a great place to let myself out. That being said, it seemed fitting that my last post be my suicide note. So here it is. Goodbye.

To Whom It May Concern…
If you are reading this than I am dead. This may come as a shock to most who know me. If you want to know why, it’s basically because I hate myself. I’ve actually vomited because I hate myself so much. I loathe myself. I’m tired of being mediocore. I’m tired of being a failure to everyone around me. I’m …

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5

a nobody

  January 14th, 2014 by borntolose

I think it’s quite sad that I have resorted to posting on a website like this.

It’s hard to put into words. I don’t know why I keep doing what I do. I wish I was normal. I wish I didn’t have the urge to cut myself everytime I get upset. I feel pathetic. Everytime I do it. I wish I could be normal. All this is so exhausting.

It’s exhausting pretending everyday that I’m okay. That I’m that perfect student, perfect daughter, perfect friend. It’s mentally exhausting.

My brother comes home from the Marines today. I really want to tell him my secret. I’m very afraid he’ll …

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7

Stargazing

  January 14th, 2014 by toxicluminoth

It’s partly cloudy and chilly. I can see a few stars out there. My time is up. I’m scared and sad but relieved. I wander into the dark woods.

Could be 10 minutes, an hour away maybe. If I do make it, I will be sure to let you all know what happened.

Thank you all for the kind words and support. It really does help. Keep doing helping people fight this before it is too late for them.

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2

Goodbye Everyone

  January 14th, 2014 by johnwhogivesashit

Eventually you realize you might as well stop gambling when the casino is rigged. The dice are loaded. You can only lose so many times… The roulette wheel always lands on zero… Eventually you just got to stop the insanity of it. Why spin again? Eventually I always lose. The house always wins…. Gotta do what any gambling man would do in my position… Raise the stakes…all in…the hand ………….loaded:6

I’ll get lucky eventually       John G.

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2

  January 14th, 2014 by Pacific

You tell them that you want to find a beautiful place to die in. They question your motives. You say it’s simply because you’re tired. They tell you that maybe it’s because you never sleep. You tell them that you are worn out. They don’t understand why you’re upset. You tell them that it’s just who you are. They bring up the fact that you smile everyday. You try to explain to them that you smile to remind yourself of who you are. They’re confused that you’ve suddenly become a different person. You apologize for being a burden. They tell you not to worry but …

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6

Final Straw

  January 13th, 2014 by Pbsmurderer

I’ve been pondering this for over a year,  I told myself that if life didn’t get better by the new years came, I’m killing myself. I’ve got no reason to live, I’ve got no motivation to do anything more than stay at home, at school I’m failing every single one of my classes, I’ve got no friends, my family is gone, my teachers hate me, people in school hate me, and I hate myself. Today was it, someone useless like me is better dead anyways, I don’t even know anyone who could possible care about this suicide not.

So tonight, I’m gonna drink all the pills …

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2

  January 13th, 2014 by hellblau

I can’t sleep, I just breathe, I am afraid of nights, That’s when they come around, I don’t want them in, I want them to leave, and it hurts like hell, it hurts like hell…

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3

Someone who was MORE shit out of luck

  January 13th, 2014 by HealingInHisWings

121410

You know what makes me feel better sometimes when I’m feeling down?

Reading a true story about someone who is up shit creek farther than me.  At least I have a paddle.

Adrift is a great true story about Mr Callahan, who was trapped on a rubber ducky life raft in the ocean for 76 days.  Here is a link to the eBook download (mods, I believe the author made the book public domain at one time)

Callahan_Steven-Adrift.epub:

http://easyfilesharing.info/file/1550/callahan-steven-adrift.epub

Here is a link to the authors website.  He worked on the movie Life Of Pi as well:

http://www.stevencallahan.net

 

 

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19

In the depths of anorexia… I am now choosing to die by dehydration.

  January 12th, 2014 by disappearinggirl

I feel as though I need to express my final words somewhere. I clearly cannot reach out to loved ones about my decision, but I feel the need to write a final “goodbye” so to speak. I have been suffering from anorexia for 7 years. It has truly been a coping mechanism for the deep depression I feel and being unable to process my emotions in a healthy way. Without it, I cannot function. With it, I cannot function. There seems to be no winning for me. I have tried treatments and therapy and medicines, it doesn’t work. I am scheduled to be admitted to …

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6

I’m so confused

  January 11th, 2014 by lonelyyforever

I feel like ending my life. I feel like I don’t deserve to live because I’m not a good person I’m always unhappy even when things are good. I’m 19 and I recently won a scholarship to go to
School & at first I was super happy but now  I’m about to start in 2 days but I’m not excited anymore (btw it’s my first semester) but it’s like there was so many problems with getting the scholarship in my funds and I had so many issues understanding the the whole process of what was going on with my enrollment and all that stuff. Ugh my …

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1

That Awkward Moment

  January 8th, 2014 by Poptartz24

If you have a long life line on on your hand, don’t try to commit suicide. For there can’t be a way to do it. This is how I prove it.

Like my other post this evolves me cutting my wrist.

I was listening to the Lavender Town theme. (pokemon) I was only 11. I was so scared I cut my wrist were my veins are, it didn’t work. I saw my line was rather long. I knew what that meant.

If you prove in any way it’s wrong, I’ll believe you.

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14

Mental Problems

  January 8th, 2014 by Poptartz24

Don’t get mental problems it could lead to this.

I have mental problems. I go to therapy alot. But still I cut myself. I make attempts to kill myself. Everyone thinks I’m crazy. I can’t sleep. I don’t talk to anyone at school. (I’m in high school). My mom talks to me and I feel uncomfortable when she does that.

The way I try to kill myself is like this: I take a razor and cut my wrist. It dosen’t work though. Maybe I should use a knife. Once I get the chance I’ll do it.

You might think I’m crazy, or I need to …

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11

The perfect suicide method

  January 8th, 2014 by Engeltje

Everyday I feel worse, but there are days that I feel really really bad. Like today. I constantly think about suicide, which is driving me crazy, because somewhere I know I’m not able to die, no matter how badly I’ll try. But still I’m searching all over the web to find ‘the perfect suicide method’, but I know somewhere that ‘the perfect suicide method’ doesn’t exist. But still I’m searching for it (man, i feel like an idiot now). No, my suicideplan isn’t completed yet, but in days like these, my suicideplan gets completer and completer, which actually gives me rest.

I haven’t found ‘the …

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