Rants

1

Honestly Honesty

  September 9th, 2018 by LiquidHuman

I’m not going to lie to you.
Sometimes i wish I could just fade out right here and now.
Im not going to pretend that I think life is one big open door.
And no no I don’t need you to tell me there is so much worth living for.
Because I won’t believe that yet.
I mean with the hatred and rigidity and sorrow and cruelty,
And how everyone thinks they’re right.
And well, I’ve heard it so much,
The arguments and rants of our parliaments
That I no longer believe any of us got it right.
And it’s slightly annoying that we’re so petty.
But not nearly as annoying as sad.
And you can call

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2

My love anniversary! I do not want to be around to see it next year:(

  September 6th, 2018 by lostallhope123

Today, is my 9th love anniversary as per Indian date – September 7. But he is no more. He is my best friend, and then my first love and we happened to fall in love during our college. Exactly after one month and one week of our relationship, I lost him to an accident. That’s where it all started. Depression. Feeling to end this life.

I’m so overthinking, so overly emotional, so sentimental. I have been this way since my childhood. I do not know how to handle my emotions even for smaller things. When I lost him, I felt my entire world became completely darker …

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5

Why I’m a Worthless Person

  September 6th, 2018 by LiquidHuman

I just fucked up today. I’m pretty sure I just ruined my relationship with my family. In all honesty, I hope they do hate me. I feel like I deserve it. Maybe this event will finally cement the idea that they raised a failure and they’ll just give up on me. So now, I’m writing this, as a way to publicly humiliate myself in a way that won’t make me a public nuisance. To tell everyone exactly what makes me such a piece of shit.

Honestly, I don’t know where to start. There’s so much wrong with me, putting into words how fucked up I am …

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2

Mistakes leading into and sustaining my marriage

  September 6th, 2018 by shadow-elk

Over ten years ago, I left a long-term relationship for what I hoped was going to be a happy, fulfilling marriage.

I’d been raised to be a good girl. A doormat, really. I was to put others’ needs before my own. If I was nice, others would like me and do things for me. I was also taught that men would do stupid things and I just had to accept the things they did; “boys will be boys.” This poor upbringing led me to believe that it was normal for men to be childish, sex-hungry idiots and I just had to put up with it.

My first …

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2

i hate everything

  September 5th, 2018 by maddy54

i’m not depressed, i’ve just ruined life for myself. i don’t blame people for hating me.

but please, stop looking at me with those eyes, like you feel sorry for me or some shit. i don’t care, i don’t need your pity. i know i’m ugly, i’m know i’m unlikeable, i know i’m a nervous wreck, you don’t need to remind me.

to everyone i’ve ever hurt: i’m sorry. i’m sorry i’m a screw up, i’m sorry i’m over dramatic, i’m sorry for being so unlikeable and the being the biggest burden to ever walk the earth (and don’t tell me i’m not a burden, because i …

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4

Somebody mixed my Medicine

  September 5th, 2018 by Yikrens

Instead of Propofol I had a deadly substance in the glass. I took 2ml but screamed for 3 Hours.

I was in pain.

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0

wave of depression

  September 5th, 2018 by tiredofchronicpain

I am a 29 year old male suffering from a soup of mental disorders and other tribulations, hence my other posts. I am unemployed, living with my parents after graduating with my electronics engineering degree. I am unable to find work, depressed, and tired. Instead of explaining my previous posts over again, I will just come to the point of how I feel now. At this moment, I am at a low no one else around me can surface. I suffer from something that I was afraid might get worse by time; I suffer from extreme self hate and body dysmorphic disorder – or as …

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1

I am not happy

  September 3rd, 2018 by dsemfodi

Everything’s falling apart. I felt empty now. My world’s becoming darker. Gone is the girl who laughs a lot. I don’t even know now how to smile, how to say ‘Hi’ to someone. I’m starting to shut the door. No one will come in anyway. I’m not happy. I don’t even know the definition of happiness anymore.

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1

Does it even matter

  September 3rd, 2018 by PanicRevelation

Does it even matter anymore? honestly it never did.

I tried so hard and so hard to die but each attempt failed leaving me here. So many years wasted.

How much more shame can i build up.

I thought maybe appreciating the small things in life would lead me to a happier life. after every failed jump and drowning and overdose. After bleeding out and forced into therapy for years and years at a time. I still feel so empty inside. Nothing has helped. I just want to die but even that has proven to be useless.

So I thought dying in a different way would be more effective.

More …

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1

Have you ever had?

  September 2nd, 2018 by TakeYourPillsX

Have you ever had that feeling when you wake up you still felt Tired?

Like you just want to sleep for eternity,but you can’t because you’re afraid the nightmares will haunt you again and again…

Have you ever had the feeling when everything is just a blur now?

Like the teacher you’re listening right now sounds like static?

because you’re still tired of all those sleepless nights?

Have you ever had the feeling when what you enjoy seems a little bit dull and lifeless now?

Like reading those adventurous books and the games you play?

Most of All…

Have you ever felt like you’re on the edge?

Waiting for the right moment to explode?

Have …

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4

I’m so unsure of what to do anymore

  September 2nd, 2018 by Snowmxn

So I’d like to preface this with explaining a bit about me. I’m 17, and I’ve been extremely depressed for 3-5 years. It really started in 8th grade, and I’m about to be a senior in high school, so I guess like 4 and a half years. I love videogames, and overall I think I have a pretty good life. I’ve been in psychiatric facilities 6 times, having been hospitalized 6 times I’m pretty familiar with mental illness and I’ve helped countless people along the way. I haven’t been hospitalized in around 8 months now, and I was hoping I wouldn’t be ever again. However, …

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0

Precognition of Pain

  September 2nd, 2018 by Yikrens

it’s okay that everyone turn missing for a little, for a short, for long, for ever.pretending soon or close to have born alone, to be raised alone, to learned alone and to loved alone, cried alone and married alone.

to have fucked alone, till I found myself in a lie, one of which the wreck turned to recover and inserted in this world alone that suddenly I turned insane to not been at all alone.

but all I meet, anyone there is getting me to know is fading out life.

the world is yet not close to understand, healed. corruption is raised and cultivated. any declaration destroyed and …

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16

What if there is no exit?

  September 2nd, 2018 by Yoges

Lately been thinking about possibilities of afterlife. Damn I hope religion got it all wrong. I can’t stand an eternal life promised to good christians or heaven with virgins guaranteed to true muslims.

Spookiest of all is reincarnation by bad karma. It says that if you commit suicide, you return in next life to a similar condition as past life. If you do it a second time, you return a third time and so on. Over and over again until you finally get your act right.

I need someone to prove its all bullshit, that when I die, I cease to be. Mind dissolves as brain disintegrates …

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2

All Suffer All Pain All Humiliation

  August 31st, 2018 by Yikrens

It are happening circumstances which are questionable at all.

All of my 4 Bikes are broke, one has kicked till the Wheel can’t turn anymore.

My mother probably lost her work because I had worked little there but broke the rules.

My Dad lost an entire Nail and is pretending that it’s an old wound. Tbh I didn’t saw it anytime before in my Life.

My Granddad died when I was in a Country where Me or my relatives never had been before. As urgent it was, I’ve been kept forcefully in the Country.

My Grandmother turned psychic and died. It is as if I brought our family all this …

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2

Redact

  August 24th, 2018 by Feiyuin

I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I …

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6

  August 22nd, 2018 by 678543212

My thoughts are so disjointed I can’t even write without losing what I’m trying to say but after all I still try anyway. Trying anyway, but trying is kind of pointless. Everyday I wake up and I try but everyone around me doesn’t understand anything I say I feel like I say so much and speaking is just sounds in anyway and words are all lies in the end. I don’t know. I get help, I got help, maybe I should get more, but I can’t get help because I can’t help myself, as I lie all the time like words are lies and I …

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5

Irrationality in a Nutshell

  August 22nd, 2018 by robieli

The fact is no rational thought I have will be my own. It will be what I was told to say. If I say for example: “Life is worth living”, that is other people saying that. I don’t think that, I think life and people are terrible, and no one should of been born in this ball of hell.

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2

A year of Suicidal Ideation

  August 21st, 2018 by lostsoul21817

August 21,
Today is the day where it all started.The day where my seemingly happy life started to shatter and fail miserably.Until the age of 17,I’ve only heard of depression but I’ve never experienced it.One year later,I’m heavily depressed and on the verge of suicide.It’s funny how life changes in just a matter of days.

One year of living with depression has taught me many things in life and it also taught me not to trust any Fuckin’ bastards and bitches.The pain may fade away,but you will carry the bruises until your very last breath.For a few weeks,I’ve been able to suppress my suicidal ideation for sometime.

I’m …

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6

I am fatigued

  August 21st, 2018 by ariusversea

School is starting soon.

I wasted my summer working to try to catch up to her.

She’s probably on vacation on some island somewhere, basking in the sun and blue waters.

I wasted my summer. On her. And she doesn’t even know.

I’m tired. Exhausted. Burnt out before I was even turned on.

I want to go back. To when I was 12 and I just wanted to die because I feared the future. Because I knew it would be bad and I would have responsibilities but I would never be enough and I would be stuck being insufficient but depended on.

And I was right.

I …

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2

Back at it again on my BS

  August 19th, 2018 by SuperSoup

I never got therapy like my parents said I would. I’m starting to cut (it’s not deep and looks more like scratches but I’ve never cut before). At least I stopped “drinking” antifreeze (I found out it was actually coolant because I’m so fucking stupid I can’t even hurt myself when I want too). Whenever I feel like shit I keep making plans for my suicide. So far I’ve chosen a date and time, a method, a place, and, today, my last words. I don’t know when or if I should talk to people about the root causes cause they really can’t do shit to …

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