crisis in midlife

  July 12th, 2010 by Alright23

Last October, after 10 years of being together and 3 kids, My wife and I split. We were and remain pretty toxic towards eachother. I was her enabler, and she was my reason to limit myself.
Let me clarify:
As a husband, I believe it is important to take into consideration the path which your decisions will take your family. With a partner I think one should make those decisions together.
After 9/11 I went to enlist. The reaction I got from my newly-wedded spouse was, “I don’t want to be a military wife. I know there re benefits, but I don’t want to be alone. If you …

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In my heart I begged her not to go (revisited).

  July 1st, 2010 by Vincent

My story of survival from suicide after my break up.

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ranting after braking up with BF

  June 30th, 2010 by Nikki

Has anyone ever had to see the one they love.. love someone els. do u know the heartbreak an the tears that come with it. i think that everyone who has felt this dose one of two things
One: die inside but show the world that ur ok
Two go insane.
why dose this heart ripe apart and shatter into a million shards.
“I love you!” is a sick ass joke that asshole made up. there is no love there is no soul mate and there sure as hell no one that can protect you. so i say dont trust and so what if the world fucks …

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Have you seen?

  June 30th, 2010 by Nikki

Ppl will fall and ppl will rise. the good thing is there are then ppl who will not only help but lift you up with here own problems.the light of the world grows on that and if you are good and the angels are nice that day then you will grow with the world. but then if the angels never come around and the demons seem to pile up then the only thing to do is fight back. No mater what it is not right to surender and lay down. if by surendering you give up what make you you then your squewed.

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So tired

  June 30th, 2010 by rollergirl1234

I’m new to this site. My name is Hannah. I’m a severe self-harmer. I cut, burn, hit, anything to feel pain. I’ve been hospitalized 3 times because of it. I’ve also been hospalized for Bulimia Nevosa, which I’ve been suffering from for 2 years. I have Bipolar-depression, GAD (generalized anxiety disorder), acrophobia, and PTSD. I’ve been having a hard time lately. Schools ou, which means nothing can distract me from my life. My addictions. My “drugs”. It seems like everything is spinning out of control. Emotions turning left and right and left again. I’m keeping secret after secret after secret. I’m lying about everything. My …

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i can’t do this anymore.

  June 30th, 2010 by tallibee

Everytime I have a moment of happiness, a moment of peace, it is taken from me.

I was in love with a friend who I only knew for a short amount of time, but above that he was someone who I let in behind the masks. Of course he broke my heart. I don’t know what I expected. No one wants a worthless screw up like me…. no one wants a girl who is ugly either.

and I dont just mean on the outside. Inside I’m ugly. I’m filled with such venom. Such hatred. for everything. for everyone, but mostly for myself. I hate when people say …

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  June 28th, 2010 by nwinn5

why does it only take one small thing to demolish all the hard work you have done to get to the mental point you are at, at this very moment in time, one hurtful comment or slip in judgement could be the thing than pushes you over the edge, the person could have no idea how you are feeling inside but still chose to say what they feel like. another thing that can sets me off is listen to music that is about relationships, the one thing that used to make me happy now kills me deep inside, but there is nothing I can do …

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The stress and pain increasing to high level

  June 28th, 2010 by Wahunter2008

Today, as I talked to my wife how to save our marriage, I poured out my deepest thoughts to her, as she listened with little or no compassion . My heart just cracked in a millon parts and the small light I did see at the end of the tunnel was destroyed. All the thoughts of ending my life came running back faster than. Ever.

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I’m tired of this shit

  June 25th, 2010 by Amulet09

I hate my fuckin’ life. I normally don’t ever cuss (actually I never do in real life), but the itnernet is a unique place for this sort of venting. First off, what triggered me to write this post is the fact that I’ve been really depressed lately so I’ve only been living off of caprisuns since last friday. Since then I’ve lost 8 pounds and am now 104-5ish. That’s not the problem. My mom ever since her dad went to live with my aunt with their new baby I’ve been picking up more chores around the house lately. Everyday, my mom keeps screaming at me …

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Had enough of everything- I just want out :(

  June 25th, 2010 by gilmoregirl

Okay- I may only be 17 so some would say that I am too young and have my whole life ahead of me, but right now it honestly doesn’t seem to be worth it. I’ve already half heartedly attempted to overdose twice but I’ve always made sure that the amount I take is relatively small so that deep down I know I probably won’t actually kill myself- I just go through the process.

My whole life I have aimed towards becoming a vet and recently, I’ve realised that this probably won’t happen because I’m not accademically strong enough- I’m close and its literally probably only by …

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Can’t take much more!

  June 22nd, 2010 by ChangingSlowly

I just want to vent and hopefully get some input from some complete strangers with the hopes that you can picture what I’m saying and be completely honest.

First I’ll start with a little about me, I’m a single parent of three kids…..ages 3, 4 and 5. I’ve been unemployed for fours years and have no income at all. I was let go from my job right after my second child was born but had an excellent employment record with my employer.  My kids and I live with a friend and I completely feel like I’m free loading. I do odd jobs here and there to help out

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Am I not worth it?

  June 20th, 2010 by loreildarksky

I have a family. My parents are still married, and no one has died. No one is on drugs… (or at least I’m pretty sure that no one is…). But I hate it.

We say we love each other, but do we? I’m thinking it depends on what we’re thinking love is. If love is putting someone down, then saying, “Just kidding, I love you,” and laughing about the hurt look on your face, then maybe we do.

Or maybe we are just ignoring how we feel. Both ourselves and our family.

Personally, I don’t know, and I don’t really care, which actually scares me. Not caring about …

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way away, away from here i’ll be.

  June 16th, 2010 by careex

i’d like to get out of my house.

my father is extremely verbally abusive. more than a year ago, he lost his job. he’s only gotten worse since then. i often get out of the house & walk to my best friend’s house, makeup completely washed away from tears. too bad i always have to go back. i’d do anything to stay at my friend’s house; her family actually likes me. they care about me.

i grew severly depressed 2 & 1/2 years ago, and for a few months it dissipated as i fell in love. but later, i realized it was just a distraction. and now

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Meds turning me into a zombie

  June 15th, 2010 by jellybean.12

Anyone taking 300 mg serroquel and trazadone?

If there is then you know how it feels, Im way more tired the morning after iv taken them, I have no emotion, and i feel sick, im like a zombie. atleast my panic attacts can wake me up a little. Thank god my seroquel dose has ben lowerd to 300mg, but as i said still feel like shit.

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…Just another day in paradise…

  June 13th, 2010 by Vincent

Dear Everyone,

       Hi. I came here…to this site, because I didn’t know what to do. I still don’t, and I don’t know what to say to keep you reading, to keep you listening. I guess, we are all united in a way aren’t we. We all write our stories, and we share them, all united in the fact that at one point, we all wanted to die. This a connection I believe is very special, I don’t know you. I can’t see in my mind what you look like at your desk, chair, or couch right now in front of your monitor, but part of …

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So Very Tired…

  June 10th, 2010 by Shelly

I feel so tired that I wish I could just go to sleep one last time and never wake up again, that would be soo nice right now. And it’s not just a tiredness caused by too many late nights, trust me, it goes much deeper than that. Basically I’ve grown so world weary that I’m tired of life itself and now quite at my wits end for the incessant doubts, fears and anger have really taken their toll on me. Sometimes I think this is all just a bad nightmare and one day I’m going to wake up and everything will be fine, but I …

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Hell is a place on earth

  June 7th, 2010 by Just a stupid kid

Where the river runs red,
no one sleeps, but the dead,
with their eyes open wide,
they know nothing of pride,
in this land, despair reigns,
it has people in chains,
but the world doesn’t care,
it doesn’t know that it’s there,
for what it’s made this land feel,
it doesn’t believe to be real.

In the place where the red river flows,
it is only those,
that have lived there,
who can know,
why? People often come, but never go,
as where the river runs red,
all the people are dead.

When the shadow falls,
across your face,
and the crumbling walls,
leave only darkening dust in your place,
there’ll be no one left who recalls,
your realisation, you won’t fall with grace.

Instead you’ll die by …

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  June 3rd, 2010 by Vamp

Why is it that I cannot trust anyone? I refuse to trust even myself at times. I can’t trust my parents, my friends, or even my girlfriend. Am I really alone, or is it just what I believe, regardless of whether I want to or not? Am I truly so worthless, so lifeless, so useless? I wish I could be someone else. Everyday, just someone else. No one understands my pain. No one could EVER comprehend my pain, my suffering and sorrow. No one…

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I’m not sure why I bother

  May 24th, 2010 by pointlessburden

I think I’m here hoping that venting out some of my feelings might help me make it through. Maybe make me feel better. I won’t say happy just better.

I’m 37 years old and I’m a screw up. I’m finally the end of  horrible 10 year marriage, with a mentally ill person.

In the past few weeks I’ve seem to have lost just about everything.  The worst being the most perfect person I’ve ever met. She made me feel happy and content in ways I can’t explain, and I thought it was the same for her. Our only problem was distance. And in truth me, I screwed up …

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  May 21st, 2010 by erased_orion

I’ve been a member of this site for a while now, and really…I haven’t been on this page for about 5 months because I thought everything was going to be fine. Someone helped me stop cutting, I was doing okay at school. And then today, my stupid dad just…

My parents want me to stop going to school because we just can’t afford it right now…heh. It’s nothing new, I’m pretty sure tons of students are facing the same thing. It’s just that…I was going to be a junior in high school. I was so excited for everything, prom and thinking about college. And now, just 3 weeks before …

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