Rants

0

I don’t see my self finishing it. I feel like shit.

January 11th, 2018by Urm8451n

I lost so much at the last years.

I know I would never be the same person, I already saw myself changing with the years.

I became a mad-man ;
Lacking sympathy, don’t feel love or any kind of true social bond.

I became more and more sociopath, but with the understanding of human beings. I can identify most of the people’s weaknesses and I usually take advantages of it for my own good, only to survive.

Look… It is just that I’m pissed of on my reality.

But I guess it doesn’t matter. AS LONG AS I KEEP PUSHING THE SHIT OUT OF IT.

anyway good day you all, with …

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5

I lied… Why admit it?

January 10th, 2018by Urm8451n

I lied to you guys about quitting this site…
I just can’t, you strangers are the only one to talk to.
I’m getting really lonely, and afraid of losing control.
I’m at my second semester, February is going to be the finals (University tests). Last semester I scored 88.5 average which is pretty high. But I promised my mom to score around 95 this semester.

I’m focused on the target…..but at the end of the day, when it gets silent, and I feel like talking, I’ve none to talk to.

I’m a friendly fine looking man, it is not that I don’t …

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12

Don’t think I’ll make it

January 9th, 2018by eeyore

Theres this pain in my chest that reminds me that I probably never make it

I’ll never be able to “show my true colors” I’m not sure who I am. I don’t know what my favorite things r I never care and I don’t think anyone ever will either. Will I ever find out what my goals for life are and would I even be able to achieve them

I feel like I don’t want myself. It’s kinda like I have no faith or hope in myself

Ive been feeling really empty lately I can’t even cry I’m just empty I don’t sleep I don’t eat I don’t …

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5

I feel..

I feel..

January 9th, 2018by RiloMor

I know it’s kind of dumb thinking this way. Like, it’s not my fault my dad was not the brightest bulb in the box and I know this. But I hate him for doing this to me.

Maybe it’s me over-thinking things but, from my knowledge and knowing serverl people with disorders physical and mental as well as having researched it extensively.. I just can’t help but think that my father, and his stupied genes gave me all these worries. Hell, my half sister and half brother are even worse than I am after he got married to a lady whose bulb seems to be on …

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3

I don’t know anymore.

January 8th, 2018by foreverinevitable18

Hi I’m an 18 year old college student who is going through a lifetime of stress, depression, and anxiety. Depression has always been a factor in my life, for I have been depressed for six years now and find no way out. Although I am a very smart individual and have a great circle of friends who care for me, I have issues with opening up with people. I struggle with telling others of how I truly feel because I believe that they truly wouldn’t care, is it wrong to believe that individuals only care for their self being? I am constantly abusing drugs and …

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1

Sorry

January 7th, 2018by Yeah, I know

I simply can’t think of any words that could save you.

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4

One more day ….

January 6th, 2018by Mike094

Well hey people of the Suicide Project….. Its me again . Ive posted before about the loss of my GF of two years due to my family . I’ve raised a wonderful kid in that relationship he’s 5 now and reading im proud of him ….. Its been a month since the last time i saw my (Ex) and i still miss her & little man everyday . I know she wont take me back . We got along so well never argued and always laughed with eachother….. Love her more than life itself . Which speaking of life ….i dont see a point anymore …

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1

Rant.

January 5th, 2018by dnveufncqa

Relationships, they never have been my strong suit. I don’t know if it’s me, or it’s the people I date but my relationships always end with me broken. Somehow though, after every time i’m broken I manage to pick myself up. This last one though, has really been screwing with my head. I ended it myself, but it didn’t hurt any less than if he was the one to break it off. He hurt me, over and over, but I stayed because I didn’t have anyone else.  Who would’ve thought, that my most successful relationship that I’ve ever had would be my worse? Why? Of …

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6

i won’t grow to be old

January 5th, 2018by iamdarling

i’m not sure why, but i have this weird feeling that i won’t grow to be old. i mean, i can’t imagine myself living until i’m, what, ninety?

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2

What’s the point?

January 3rd, 2018by crying1997

What’s the point of living in this bullshit world we call reality? When I can go to these “fantasy” worlds of my own creation and have experiences so much more vivid and engaging than anything I’ve ever experienced in this “reality”? Hate, sadness, fear, happiness; they all are so much more clearer there than in this place. I can be the hero I’ve always wanted to be there as well. It’s a win-win situation. Why does this “reality” have to be so messy? I just hate it so much. I would love to just sit by in my “fantasy” worlds and watch this “reality” pass …

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3

What can I do

January 3rd, 2018by crackedheart

I just have no idea what to do anymore. I don’t want to be alive anymore but I can’t kill myself because anytime I think about doing it and how much I just don’t want to be forced to live on this rock, I see my parents and friends faces and how sad they’d be. This always brings a sense of hopelessness, I can’t die, I don’t wanna be here but I have to be so fuck what do I do. I’ve never felt like I belong anywhere on this whole world and constantly feel homesick for a place that I’m losing hope I could …

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2

Want to hurt myself all the time

January 3rd, 2018by Bunnytea

I want to hurt myself almost everyday. The main thing that keeps me from hurting myself is that I don’t want to end up in the mental hospital again. All of my mental hospital visits have been bad or outright traumatic thus far.

So many times, I get so upset at myself that I want to bang my head against the wall. I think “You’re stupid, worthless piece of s***!” and yell at myself and I cry because of how much I hate myself and can’t stand being alive. I have hurt myself by hitting my head before, usually when I was already in a mental …

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11

If God exists!

January 3rd, 2018by Mgababa

There are few theories explaining how life came about, then there’s the most senseless one in my opinion and is widely regarded as true: Creation. I cannot dismiss its  possibility though. If it’s true however, then its the saddest reality in my opinion, it shows that there’s a greater “evil” than we actually witness in the world, there’s the most wicked entity and that entity is the one responsible for creation therefore all that we come across, that repulsive; spiteful and vile entity is god. For all my life I’ve never experienced true happiness, and the situation gets worse with time. I tried

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2

Surviving New years day …the end of a fairytail

January 1st, 2018by Mike094

I don’t know how i didn’t decide to end it today like i told myself i would . This December has been extremely hard on me . I’ve lost my girlfriend who deeply loved …due to family calling her nasty names ect and for two years we were together . I helped raise a child that wasnt mine but cared so much for him . My story is basically a bad break up …. That we ended on good terms but not by my choosing my family destroyed it . She couldnt take it anymore as she was crying on the phone with the names …

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7

December 29th, 2017by eeyore

I love how my dad decides to be a father whenever he feels like it

He expects me to take care of his family, problem is I can’t even take care of myself

he just ignores the fact that he has responsibilities and just shitting mad at me for not doing his shit and doesn’t think that what he’s doing is wrong. He never admits that he’s wrong.

I feel like my mom loves him out of fear if that makes sense she would never have the courage to leave him

we just got a new baby sister and my dad made me spend the hospital nights with my …

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0

I want to pull the fucking trigger

December 27th, 2017by Urm8451n

that is it. I had enough.
I had enough of this kind of life.
I screwed up a few times. other times I got screw over.
Im fucked up.

I want to be soulless. I want to be with out feelings
I want to be a fucking robot.

I don’t want to communicate. I don’t want to love, to cry, to be mad.

God. If you are out there, when I wake up tomorrow morning, please wake me up feeling less.
Please help me become this hollow shell.

Why would you take away from me so much, without taking my feelings too? …

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12

Need for a relationship. wtf is wrong with..

December 27th, 2017by Urm8451n

What the fuck is wrong with me?

Why am I feeling such an urge to find a girlfriend?

I have completely accepted that I don’t and will never have a dad in my life, and that my biological dad is still out there alive nothing giving a shit about me.

I have accepted the fact that right now my family is in debts and that I have to spend as less as I can.

I have accepted that I must succeed and do my best at the university to find a well paying job.

I have accepted the fact that I don’t have time to …

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2

My heart hurts it keeps pounding

December 26th, 2017by beautifulmonster

I’ve taken that many muscle relaxants I’m suprised I havnt oded. I just want my heart to stop hurting. I’m calling rehabs like a lunatic at 6:30am. They don’t give a crap.

No one does. I have no one. My heart hurts so much. What is this pain?

I’m
Willing to give up my New Years to spend in rehab. Loser much. How did I get here how?

I’m a good girl. I’m
Nice. I’m loyal. I help people.

Why is this happening to me.
Someone make my heart stop pounding pleass

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2

Memories in Reverse

December 25th, 2017by SunshinesBlackhole

So the boy I was falling in love with died less than three months ago and I’m okay sometimes and other times it’s worse than when I got assaulted years ago and thought I was dying.

Memories of him always pop up, always freeze me up, make me break down and hide away and I’m fairly used to it, but I’m the past few days I’ve been having memories of him that never happened nor could ever happen, because, well, he’s dead now.

I see him and I playing in the snow together. I see him surprising me with cute things. Celebrating the holidays. I feel myself …

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4

There is only one truth. . .

December 22nd, 2017by Us3rname

. . . And it is nothing.

 

This has been my first post. Thank you very much for reading.

A bit about me?

I’m from New Zealand, I was a really happy positive out going popular child, always aware that I was adopted, always knew my birth mother though I’ve only just seen my birth father and his family including my two half-brothers I never knew I had for 38 years last week at a pre Christmas get-together (totally full on). I was the sort of child who’d invite their entire class of 40 to their 6th birthday causing all sorts of headaches for their parents (this happened).

I …

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