Stories of Loss

For those who have passed on.

3

7,7,7,0

  May 10th, 2009 by AbsentFeeling

I forgot about everything. Just a total blank out and then I fell apart. Tears were pouring down my face. When my mom finally came back from work we decided to go for a car drive. She said, as she often does, that something wasn’t quite right about me. Then she asked if I was at all suicidal. I quickly told her no, hoping to hear what would happen if I had said yes. She did a small cough/laugh and said that if I said yes I would go straight to the Mental Hospital. I know for sure that I couldn’t talk to her about …

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5

Untitled

  May 10th, 2009 by painterofmusic

No one is going to read this. I don’t know why I came back here to this website. I figured I never would after I found it the first time, but here I go again… This is exactly like when I found out I was pregnant, to a T; I was going to end my life, but then, an opportunity presented itself. I saw what might be a reason to live. Judging by before, assuming that the past paints a pretty good portrait of the future, I’ll be worse off than before. If I had gone through with everything before, I wouldn’t be hurting this way …

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3

Career Loss

  May 7th, 2009 by softexcel

Many people have lost everything through this recession…  I lost my job and career ‘two recessions ago’ and cannot obtain work to save my life.  Am well educated, an engineer.  But my family is poor, so no trust fund :)   The pain of being ostracized from society and having a career ripped from my hands is so painful that I want to die.  Age discrimination, racism, sexual harrassment, chauvinism, many nasty things go on in the field of engineering.  One must have a skin made of titanium to survive the games, especially if one is a woman.  The women in engineering do not always support

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1

What has happened to me?

  April 23rd, 2009 by howmuchcanibear

I am a 39 year old female, who has worked hard my whole life and up till a few years ago could not have been prouder of where I was, and how far I had came. I have never been in trouble with the law, and have been with my husband for over 20 years, and could never think of life any other way. Till 3 years ago. I had a siezure. I had not had any health problems at all before that, but after that first one, I had 3 more within 2 months. After many, many different doctors, we never found out why. …

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3

From someone who has loved…lost…heartbroken….and is slowly picking up the pieces…

  April 21st, 2009 by kay

In September my mum took her own life, she brought me up as a single teenage mum and made my life as amazing as she possibly could. She went back to school, achieved a business degree and got a great job helping small nurseries improve their business and the standard of child care. She was a beautiful, intelligent, creative, funny, loving and much loved woman…my heroine and inspiration. She also suffered varying degrees of depression throughout her life and tragically last summer had a nervous breakdown – sadly due to the stress of her job and bullying in it. She

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5

It’s Hard to Believe That it Came to This…

  April 21st, 2009 by drearyvampire

Oh god. I hate myself. I hate myself and everyone and everything around me. Where do I start?

My issues started when my mum and identical twin died in my old American habitat. I was 5. Then my dad made us move to England, where I started school. I never fitted in. I was always an outcast. They bully me mercilessly, still to this day. Then in 2008, I met my future boyfriend. His name was Stefan and he was Italian. We were together for 4 months, when I said I loved him. Do you know how painful it is to tell someone you love them and …

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3

Gone

  April 17th, 2009 by mickey-12-2015

I am only 12. at age 12 my brothers freind at age 18 tryed to rape me. His name is Bidy and right know i am scared to even have a boyfreind. many times i have held a razor blade to my wrist. two cuts and it would all be over. Their is a s on my leg that will be there for forever. The S stands for my best freind first letter in her name Sammy. oh god i love that girl she is like my sister. I have started middle school, and am in track. i cut and cut and cut but it …

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1

inpending doom

  April 7th, 2009 by hopeless72

Last week my husband came to see me so that we could talk. Well he came back the next day and then stayed the nite on friday nite. He had told me we were sole mates and would be together for the rest of our lives. I had to work on saturday so he went to help his mother with yard work. He sent me a text message staing he would be to my house after i got off work at 6. He then sent another text message about two hours later that asked me if i would be upset if he didnt come over

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4

Lost Love

  April 5th, 2009 by Scarlet

I am a 14 year old boy, and I had fallen in love with a 16 year old girl, and she had fallen in love with me. We dated for months, and I think most would call our relationship unhealthily obsessive. We spent literally most of every day together, and we could barely bear to be away from eachother. We both thought about the other frequently, and we’d claimed that we always wondered if we were thinking about eachother at the same time. I always forgave her for everything and felt horrible when she gave up something for my sake, such as canceling something to …

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2

getting closer to suicide

  March 30th, 2009 by homeoffice

I’ve read a couple of posts and I think its great that people have a chance to express themselves and get others to help. I’ve tried to fill myself 4 or 5 times now and I havent been able to do it. I know that most people have issues and that they find it difficult to talk to someone or maybe feel that there is no way out.

I never believed in suicide and I always thought that anyone that tired to kill themselves was selfish and that they didn’t think of the people around them that could help. At the very worst I thought you …

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12

A DECONSTRUCTED LIFE

  March 28th, 2009 by deliriousgirl

Yesterday was my brother’s birthday.

My brother, who would have been 47 years old, committed suicide by hanging himself from his attic trapdoor in the hallway of his house on December 15th, 2008.  He left no note, no explanation, no message of any kind.  Since his death I’ve had the near-obsession of recreating his life from the scraps that were left.  An email here and there (I was able to hack into his computers), a receipt from Home Depot (for rope, plastic zip ties, and a metal pole) that was dated four weeks prior, bills and business files, phone calls and messages on his cellphone, the …

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1

love hurts

  March 23rd, 2009 by mattman375

I was going ou with Sarah for 3years 4 months. we had our ups and downs just like any normal people. Her life was not a good one but i was there to make it better for her. She wanted to be a veterinary nurses i tryed to help her get to her dream job but couldn’t. so in the ned she did give up on it.

It got to the ponit there I wanted to be with her for the rest of my left but i wanted to be a good husband and get it so that i could look after her and have a …

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2

I’m Not Quite Sure.

  March 22nd, 2009 by forrealzkaitlyn

 I think it all happened in seventh grade. I met this wonderful girl, her name was Patricia. I first met her in drama class, she had brought this razor to class and was cutting up her notebook. All I could think of was the razor I played with last night cutting into my wrists again and again. I slowly fell for her, she didn’t even help me up. I was so near to telling her how I had felt, but she told me about this guy, they were going out and she was inlove with him. . . She tore my heart out, squised it …

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2

so confused

  March 21st, 2009 by soconfused

I dont know what im going to do without her. She was my bestfriend at least i thought. I wasted 3 years of my life in some friendship. You might say friendships come and go.. but ill tell you why this one was diffrent. We were more then friends at one point. She started it and i went along with it just so happy that someone loved me. One night when she stayed the night she put her arm around me and that was it. Its as much as my fault as it is hers i didnt stop anything. Nothing serious ever happened just cuddling

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3

numb

  March 18th, 2009 by greatwar

as a child beaten and unloved, told to leave and never to return.

alone and desperate for love, let in love, well what i thought was love, to be let down and left with two wonderfull children, but still wanted to be loved and wanted to be wanted, let love in again, to be beaten and abused, no one to help, let down by everyone,  12 years long years, trying to hide it form my (now three) children, lost in the divorce, hunted out of my home, relocated, in poverty, no fridge, cooker, carpets, and baillifs around tomorow to take what i have left.

iam numb, i …

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3

My story-ish

  February 17th, 2009 by Stonecolddeadinside

I know that people always say, “Oh it’ll be okay” and “Oh I’m so sorry”. They say all these things that just don’t help. But when you need it the most, there’s always one person, who’ll actually say something that helps.

I’ve lost a lot of things, Family, friends, the love of my life, and even the will to live. It hurts when someone you love lies to you, or your family disowns you.

A few months ago, I got in trouble with the law for my brother’s Marijuana in my car. I made the illogical decision to let him smoke in my car before …

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4

Spiralling downward. I think I’m loosing all I have left.

  February 10th, 2009 by Kuddles

“Is a hug and three short words, really too much? Or am I loosing him, all I have left? After loosing my mother, my father, and being separated from my sister am I loosing him too? I just don’t think I can take it.”

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1

is this it?

  February 5th, 2009 by meggzieMasqueraded

is this it??
is this all we have,, all we live for??
sometimes,, it doesnt seem quite enoughh..
also,, if it is,, then whyy do we suffer like this??

im now going to bore youu withh myy storyy althoughh i hope some people realise theyy are not the onlyy ones out there& if anyone ever needs anyyone to talkk to,, im here..

it started when i was about eight.. i was myy birthdayy& i went swimming withh some of myy friends.. it was great fun,, until myy mum got called out… i will never forget the tears& the lookk on here face when she came backk.. a lookk of pure

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2

My life has come to this?

  February 4th, 2009 by Terrified

A year ago, I was happy. Good grades, tons of friends, just started middle school. It was good.

Now, at 12, almost 13, I’m cutting myself, and having suicidal thoughts almost every day.

I don’t know how it got here, though.

My grandmother and brother died in the course of one month, but thats not it. Or at least I don’t think it is.

I guess it started as just a spur-of-the-moment thing. I started seventh grade with RSD, RA, Pain syndrome, and fucked-up nerves in my right arm. I’m in pain 24/7. And it’s not just small pain, …

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4

can someone help me

  February 3rd, 2009 by eric3034

i dont know what to do my step dad is yelling at me when i did not do any thing i am 17 lets see well it starts when i was litel my dad left my mom sexually abused me and my bother was in juvey for drugs and all my friends are neglectful i am picked on and i don’t think i can make it this time and my mom doesn’t care for me i have attempted to kill my self 3 times and faled cus some one walked in i cant see my rist all that i …

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