Suicidal Survivors

For those who have survived suicide.

2

no promises

  April 12th, 2009 by slumber33

im having a really hard time at school and at home at school i’m getting seriously bullied and i’v been punched twice for nothing at all and i keep getting threatened and i’m just so scared. at home i’m geting underestimated everone thinks i’m so stupid, that i’m no right in the head and to be honest right now i dont think i am. one night i sat with my legs dangling out my window thinking should i jump head first or not but then i thought of my mum and all my family and i didnt want them to go through pain of greef, …

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1

inpending doom

  April 7th, 2009 by hopeless72

Last week my husband came to see me so that we could talk. Well he came back the next day and then stayed the nite on friday nite. He had told me we were sole mates and would be together for the rest of our lives. I had to work on saturday so he went to help his mother with yard work. He sent me a text message staing he would be to my house after i got off work at 6. He then sent another text message about two hours later that asked me if i would be upset if he didnt come over

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2

getting closer to suicide

  March 30th, 2009 by homeoffice

I’ve read a couple of posts and I think its great that people have a chance to express themselves and get others to help. I’ve tried to fill myself 4 or 5 times now and I havent been able to do it. I know that most people have issues and that they find it difficult to talk to someone or maybe feel that there is no way out.

I never believed in suicide and I always thought that anyone that tired to kill themselves was selfish and that they didn’t think of the people around them that could help. At the very worst I thought you …

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1

Loss of my Mom.

  March 30th, 2009 by Demoniaque

Just this year on Jan 28 09 my mom passed away.

At first I couldnt beleive it. I was with her in the hospital and she was fine.

I go sit with my grandma and then next thing I hear is CODE BLUE!!

I didnt know what that meant but they sent the nurses to my mom room.

Minutes passed and the Dr came out saying ” Im sorry but her heart just gave out. ”

At that very moment my entire world collapsed!

A month pass after her death and I remembered something.

She would always give me a hug before I went to school.

I burst out in tears and reached …

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2

Such a burden and disappointment

  March 25th, 2009 by Dahass

I’ve been depressed for as long as I can remember. I don’t really know why. I just don’t like to be alive. Nothing has ever happened to me, and I think for most of my life, it hasn’t been a horrible life. I just don’t like living it anymore. It’s getting harder to deal with.

I’m 28, separated from my husband for a year now and have an unplanned pregnancy with someone who I wish would die. I’m not that lucky though. I miss being with husband, I love him more than anything and would do anything for him. We have 2 beautiful girls.  I wish …

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2

I’m Not Quite Sure.

  March 22nd, 2009 by forrealzkaitlyn

 I think it all happened in seventh grade. I met this wonderful girl, her name was Patricia. I first met her in drama class, she had brought this razor to class and was cutting up her notebook. All I could think of was the razor I played with last night cutting into my wrists again and again. I slowly fell for her, she didn’t even help me up. I was so near to telling her how I had felt, but she told me about this guy, they were going out and she was inlove with him. . . She tore my heart out, squised it …

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8

Why suicide is a lousy idea (most of the time)!

  March 14th, 2009 by drukdeur

Before I get flamed as one of those “goody two shoes”, this is not going to be a post about why suicide is morally wrong, or trying to convert you to any religion.  I am an agnostic, and I really don’t believe in forcing my morality on anyone.

I think suicide is justified in some cases: if I were to have a terminal illness, and I would be enduring a lot of pain until I die, I would consider an assisted suicide as an option.  However, when it comes to emotional pain, I think suicide is not a great option, and here’s why:

(1) We are animals,

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3

Wait

  March 9th, 2009 by aialbr

I thought furiously about how I was going to let my parents know, would an email be so bad. If I sent an email they would know straight away, but would they have the computer on, would they even check their emails. I know I didn’t, in-fact it was very rare I checked mine, I would normally have at least 100 emails to make my way through as I left it so long before looking. It does seem a little impersonal, but how else would I let them know. I put the thought to one side as my thoughts redirected themselves to …

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3

My story-ish

  February 17th, 2009 by Stonecolddeadinside

I know that people always say, “Oh it’ll be okay” and “Oh I’m so sorry”. They say all these things that just don’t help. But when you need it the most, there’s always one person, who’ll actually say something that helps.

I’ve lost a lot of things, Family, friends, the love of my life, and even the will to live. It hurts when someone you love lies to you, or your family disowns you.

A few months ago, I got in trouble with the law for my brother’s Marijuana in my car. I made the illogical decision to let him smoke in my car before …

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5

What would’ve happened?

  February 16th, 2009 by Ms. Attica

Tuesday November 17, 2008

I get home from school, the second I get there all I wanna do is dissapear.
I waited until my mom left for work, to have to house to myself. Once she was gone I lock all the doors leading outside so no one can get in. I go to the bathroom with my backpack, tissues, and cold medicine (the kind that makes you drowsey) I lock that door too. I go to the corner, and burst into tears. I cried for 2 and-a-half-hours. I then unwrap 6 of the pills, I take 3. I threw the other 3 away. Afraid that …

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4

Spiralling downward. I think I’m loosing all I have left.

  February 10th, 2009 by Kuddles

“Is a hug and three short words, really too much? Or am I loosing him, all I have left? After loosing my mother, my father, and being separated from my sister am I loosing him too? I just don’t think I can take it.”

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6

My Suicide

  February 8th, 2009 by Kieylee102

My story goes like this. My parent would fight every second of the day. I would lock myself in my room and try to block it out. But the pain kept getting worse and never stopped. So I would cut myself to make it go away. It helped for a little while but then it came back ten times stronger. So I tried to find away out and of course the way out I thought was to commit suicide. My house is a second story house and my sister’s room (which is now my room) has a window that has access to the …

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1

is this it?

  February 5th, 2009 by meggzieMasqueraded

is this it??
is this all we have,, all we live for??
sometimes,, it doesnt seem quite enoughh..
also,, if it is,, then whyy do we suffer like this??

im now going to bore youu withh myy storyy althoughh i hope some people realise theyy are not the onlyy ones out there& if anyone ever needs anyyone to talkk to,, im here..

it started when i was about eight.. i was myy birthdayy& i went swimming withh some of myy friends.. it was great fun,, until myy mum got called out… i will never forget the tears& the lookk on here face when she came backk.. a lookk of pure

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2

My life has come to this?

  February 4th, 2009 by Terrified

A year ago, I was happy. Good grades, tons of friends, just started middle school. It was good.

Now, at 12, almost 13, I’m cutting myself, and having suicidal thoughts almost every day.

I don’t know how it got here, though.

My grandmother and brother died in the course of one month, but thats not it. Or at least I don’t think it is.

I guess it started as just a spur-of-the-moment thing. I started seventh grade with RSD, RA, Pain syndrome, and fucked-up nerves in my right arm. I’m in pain 24/7. And it’s not just small pain, …

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4

life has ended for me

  January 31st, 2009 by davina_love

HI,all you can call me NENe and im 14years old and im dealing with depression right now and am taking medicine for it but it doesnt seem to be helping me very much..When i was 13years old i started thinking about suicide because all of the problems i was going through that i had caused all by myself.Well nothing worked now when i go over to my Grandmas house i would take about 3 or 4 tylenol PMs and sleeping medicine even though i have a heart but condition and i would think that since i had a heart condition all of these pills …

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4

the begining

  January 31st, 2009 by quietlyobjectified

the first time i tried to kill myself i was 6. it was right after i’d told my dad that a family friend was molesting me. he beat the crap out of me and told me it was my fault, that i asked for it. i tried to strangle myself by tying a shoelace around my throat so tight that i couldn’t breathe. i fainted and the cord snapped.

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2

Love him more than life itself.

  January 29th, 2009 by Mish

Hi all
I’m a 31 year old mother of 1 son whom has type 1 diabetes. My life is hard as it is with his illness. Constant appointments constant injections. Since he was 3 years old. I was in therapy for a long time I thought I was ok and discontinued for 3 years. I had a boyfriend at the time of my sons diagnoses but then he left me in 2004 left me with no explanation left the keys under the door with no goodbye. I was devastated. I didn’t understand why he had done this to me. I loved him with all I …

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1

This is my first and last story here-

  January 19th, 2009 by socio-slumber

It all started- at least I can remember it starting- back when I was in seventh grade. I say that, mainly because that was when anxiety was my main issue. I was that kid who was afraid of everything that came against rules. Panic attacks were the worst of it- for the most part. I would start hyperventilating if I was running late for anything. To this day I still freak out when it comes to being tardy for things. But that isn’t what we’ve come to write about is it? My ability to stay on time? Nope… …

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5

I so needed to write this

  January 18th, 2009 by Scylla

I think I have been suicidal since…well, my entire life. I’m only 26 but that thought has been with me for as long as I can remember. In my childhood/teens, I didn’t articulate it as ” i want to die”, rather, I daydreamed about dying, being kidnapped by aliens–I just wanted to be gone, forever. When people would ask me “what do you want to do when you’re old?” I had nothing to answer-not because I lacked ambition or imagination, rather, it was because I never believed I would get old. I didn’t think I would actually live.

Then, one day, it came to me as …

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0

My Hamster Wheel

  January 17th, 2009 by btru2utoo

Family – Grad School – Career – Children – Friends – Volunteering – Pets – Chores – Homework

It is like being in a hamster wheel – exhausting – constant – never ending

But, I am all smiles, say the right things, act the right way, look the right way – 4.0 , suck up at work, good to my one living parent, devoted wife, adoring mommy…

Everyone always wants another piece of me. How much can I give? During these times, I turn off my switch. I am in my twenties now and I have learned how to go numb.

Some thoughts you cannot …

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