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2

I think I got a taste of normality yesterday

July 19th, 2017by hope432

It happened after an afternoon sleep. I felt … I think alive is the word.

I spent 11 years feeling dead… and the last years were the worst ones.

But yesterday something happened. I felt alive for a moment.

Even now when I write this message I feel good.  I am also involved in spiritual activities.

I want to feel alive again… I want to feel the cold air of autumn, to feel the landscape.

I started to like art although in the past I never cared about it. Only when I was a child I used to paint.

I like the pictures of Caspar David Friederich, a northern german artist.

Our …

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1

Longing

July 19th, 2017by EyeOfHorus

Each day, I find more than anything, that aside from the immediate problems in my life; bills, friends, school, etc… I have this feeling of longing. For what? I’m not sure. I feel it when I shower, when I am driving, when I am about to sleep. At the times most peaceful, there is a longing. A draw towards something that I am missing. Each day it gnaws at me more and more, only adding to my frustration and despair. Is it you, my beloved, that I am longing for? No, it can’t be, you’ve long forgotten about me. Is it for money? Financial security? …

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8

Hello

July 19th, 2017by Hoping to Have Hope

i want to go ONE FUCKING DAY without being fat shamed by SOMEBODY.
My grandma last night “go exercise more you’re getting fat”
My mom this morning “you’re gonna do yoga right? It helps to cut down on your fat”
My dad yesterday “cut back on sugar!!!”
When I first showed them my scars and posts, they loved me, carefully choosing words.
(Not that I want to go back to being treated like glass…)
Now, I’m the one that’s too fat and stays in her room too much.
It’s not my fucking fault that I want to not be shamed for my body by my family now is it?? If they hadn’t …

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3

It’s getting worse

July 19th, 2017by Justme12

I pissed off my grandad by “accidentally” losing the keys (they were never lost, but he doesn’t forgive me) and he constantly calls me day dreamy, in a ‘you’re fucking stupid’ way (which is what he told me when he Shouted at me about my ass always being in fairyland) and now my anxiety is at ridiculous levels because I fear him, my mum fears him too. I triggered his anger and now no one is happy and he gives me the silent treatment and I feel like shit because this is my fault. My social anxiety has finally reached true crippling  levels, I tried …

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4

July 19th, 2017by Robigson

Turn around bright eyes

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1

the other one, purple’s super-game

July 19th, 2017by Bisban

 


Wood-champ, wasn’t fair.

There was only ever one team, that we ever lost to.
The ace-rock-crew; second-duel, so place your bets.
By now the thing was evolved and more astounding.
Ours as well, were on another level in the spectrum.

Relicanth, were you ready.

 

 

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2

So long, my beloved

July 19th, 2017by mranony

I saw my mother died.
I saw every breath she struggling take.
I saw the twitches of her body as she dies.
I felt the warmth slowly leaving her body.
I saw my family breaking as my mother breaks.

And it was petrifying.

And as she was being embalmed,
I burnt every imperfection in my mind.
The scar on her left chest,
The stretch marks that bare the three of us.
And all the hardships she’s been through
etched in every part of her body.

And it was beautiful.

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0

Fourth, primal, was Aegis, fifth was, Goliath, and sixths … Seraph, and the one

July 19th, 2017by Bisban

 

We had each dueled each other all already, in the training. At the top was, the flaming-one; of course. The second was, the some-kind of stranger, with the flower. And third was, Tropius, it was.

The next match arrived and we laughed to the contender; your chicken that couldn’t fly. The Horsea, that was only cute. At this point it was just for educational.. and we were just leveling up.

Down by the coast.

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0

Chapter-Numeral-X

July 19th, 2017by Bisban

 

This just might, the alpha-flight
I’m going to, I’m going to do it
Write a rap, because, god is holding me
And just like that, of Sisyphus.

And so, after many tries
To write the perfect song before the night fell
Because after-all, it only took once—- to say
That crucial statement that everybody seeks.

Sigilyph’s hieroglyphs.

But it’s not finished in the story, yet.

 

 

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3

I’m a ghost

July 19th, 2017by Katki

I think nobody can see me

I do not matter

When I cry, I cry alone

Alone,

Life goes on without me

People live their lives and don’t notice me

Or ask if I’m okay.

I must be invisible – or maybe I’ve died inside so many times

I really am a ghost

.. I don’t belong here

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42

I would have loved life.. If I was born into a different body

July 19th, 2017by cecilia108100

Maybe people would notice me more.

I wouldn’t be friendless and depressed if I was, lets say a model. People would love to be around me. It would have given me more opportunity, and I wouldn’t be dismissed so much. I’m ugly so people don’t like me. Now, I know being this is like a bullshit filter but it still hurts being lonely and seeing Instagram models live such perfect lives, while you cry to sleep every night because people only message you when they want something from you.

Good looks propel you to success, just as much as money does. Having financial stability would have been …

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6

Depressed asf Tonight..

July 19th, 2017by Todamnbad

I can’t do it anymore…too much suffering…I just want it to end…I’m ready to leave this world..I don’t think I can be saved…but I can end my suffering by ending myself..I been crying a lot every night..fuck this life..

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4

No One

July 18th, 2017by Hoping to Have Hope

No one really understands me anymore.
I have developing social anxiety (according to the slew of online quizzes) and I think depression (most likely).
I’m afraid to talk to my parents.
My dad’s a psychiatrist he’ll figure something’s up.
Maybe.
No one gets me they all either throw it off as a joke or just…I dunno.
It’s hard.
Death is a lot more….easy…and less painful in the long run.
I used to be OK. I dunno what happened.
Help.
Please.

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1

story?

July 18th, 2017by EmoPanda

i got told to write a story. My rants. My late night thoughts. My experiences in life and truth is I’m so scared to write them. I know how to make little  snippets of my story but I don’t think I could make it a book. I’m scared people will judge me. Judge the way I write, talk, or all in all the things I have had happen to me. Is there anyone I can trust not to judge? Is there anyone still real out there? I don’t know. Just another rant.

much love, much hope, much feeling,

Octavia

 

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5

Regrets …

July 18th, 2017by Birdy

I’ve made too many mistakes today. Top two: 1 Getting my hands on a razor blade and cutting my wrist, which I now have to cover in this hot weather 2 Reaching out to someone who I knew would ignore me. Ending my day feeling extra extra hateful towards myself. It happens, I guess.

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5

The empty feeling of being lonely.

July 18th, 2017by Octr

I’ve gotten to a point where I am starting to push my own boundaries and limits for a good cause, I’ve accepted that I need to make changes to myself and my life and my surroundings, it’s a start.

but what use is working on getting better when you’re this fucking lonely?

people talk to me now and again, infact I’m pretty sure I manage some kind of conversation everyday, but it’s not enough to sate this hunger for company and attention and kindness.

oh how I wish you were still around.

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0

For all the frail and mighty hearts of true!

July 18th, 2017by TheeGrandeBarrenPlateau

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12

Regret, Daydreams

July 18th, 2017by velveteennightingale

I regret having told my dad about my depression because now I’m really anxious all the time and feel like I’m letting him down if I don’t fake that I’m happy. Also I spend most time alone in my bedroom but he told me not to so now I feel naked without that safety. And of course telling him didn’t help. I should have just kept my mouth shut. Stupid extra thought: I daydream like obsessively about different situations-having a friend, etc, and recently I’ve daydreamed about having a service/emotional support dog so that it could come with me everywhere and comfort me when I’m …

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12

Life is Good…?

July 18th, 2017by Diem S. Sky

Life is good. I have a high paying job. I have a girl who wants to date me in my life. I have a couple close friends that I like. My parents are wealthy. Life is good.

Oh, but what’s the compromise? Put your head down. Listen to those that tell you to approach problems in an incorrect manner. Stay safe, don’t engage in self-harming activities. Basically, the compromise is to bow.

I spent 5 years in hell. I won’t go into the specifics, but for around 5 years I had none of these things. I had no job, I was starving half the time. I had …

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6

I want

July 18th, 2017by Robigson

I want to do things but I have no energy
I want to drink but I have no money

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