I’ve so often thought of suicide, but when I hear that word it seems inappropriate to convey what I really want. The truth is I just want an ending. I want to be free from the expectations of parents and people around me, free of the worry for money or to have a social standing. I’ve been going to college for 3 years and they haven’t been very happy. Now I flunked cell biology and my moms cutting me off, and spoke to me with the most sincere sense of disappointment. She said she loved me but I saw no love in her words. It’s […]
Recently I have become a member of this website, I thought maybe it will help me change my mind, maybe it will give me more time to decide what I want to do. And it did, reading your guys post made me give myself a week, and if nothing got better then I knew for a fact that i’d be done with it all. Luckily , on the 3rd day of giving myself a chance it changed, the hottest boy in the school asked me out. For years all the girls said I would never have a chance with the quarter back, and what now, […]
Everyone at school hates me beacuse of my scars, because im a lesbian, because im different, cause i smoke, drink and do drugs. Im the neighbourhood weirdo and everyones afraid to talk to me. Im all alone. Ive been cutting for 5 years now and still found no escape. Ive been out for 2 years (sorta only certain people really know) and i feel that i smoke drink and do drugs as an escape. No one understands what im going through. So the whole point of this is to find a point. If i have no freinds, no girlfriend, no life, my bodys barely working whats the […]
Every night I hope that the next day will be better, that the girls who think they are popular will back off and leave me alone, that they will except me for who I am. But no, they keep coming back with meaner responses, and meaner comments. They tell me to go kill myself, they tell me that I will never be loved. One of them acted like she was my friend, she found out who I had feelings for and told everyone and anyone. They are on my soccer team, I recently got into a fight with one of them, I won, but […]
Suicide? Is some way out of a miserable life. As for others, it seems as if there is no other road but that.
But its wrong, and your vision is blurred. There’s so many things you can do to help yourself, without going to any suicidal facility.
I myself love helping people, and people who WANT to live get their life tooken away everyday. People who have a loving, caring family, die everyday. MORE then half of the whole world is dealing with problems, and a bit less then half actually go threw with suicide. The bit that try and don’t make it, they realize many things […]
People always say things would be better in the morning. They aren’t. I wake up and feel the same way and have the same problems. I wish i was dead. I wanted to die last night, and realized that I threw my pills down the toilet a few months ago. I stopped the meds the doctors gave me, so, I had nothing to take. They were anti depressants. I can’t even cut myself, because, I can’t stand the smell of blood. There isn’t a tall enough building around to jump off, and getting transport now is a *****. I can’t get into any of the […]
I’m Justinee. I’m fourteen and I found out I’m pregnant. I have no support from family. I only have support from ONE of my friends. The father wants nothing to do with me and denies it all. I’m so alone. The support I have can’t compare to having Josh(my baby daddy) there for me. I’m so stressed out and that’s bad for the baby. I have moments when I want to get an abortion and pretend like it never happened. 🙁 I need him there for the baby. I need help to get him back. I’m so alone.
I used to think about suicide a lot until i joined this website. When i read other peoples suicide notes or how sad they are, reality hits me a little harder. I dont know if i know any of you, i dont know who you guys are, but right now is the closest i have ever felt to anyone in my entire life. Youre all complete strangers but i feel like i can tell you all anything and literally trust you with my life. Because of this website, i have decided not to give up. Im still going to cut, but i will not EVER […]
We are born, are educated, get a job, find a partner, have a family, make enough money to stave off discomfort, live the constant struggle of existence, get old, weak and sad, and then die.
Man killing man, people starving while others watch, rape, death: It all seems so illogical, so pointless. Life must be the complete stupidity of existence itself. Therefore we need to create artificial meaning to prop up our petty lives. We depend on religion, which answers our questions by referring to another world that doesn’t exist but provides a so called reason for living. Some people survive through apathy and conformity, following […]
I have this feeling. It starts in the back of my throat and goes down to my stomach. I can’t pinpoint exactly what it is, but I guess I can relate it to the feeling you get on a roller coaster. Not the one you get when you begin to plummet, but the one right before that. The feeling you get at the top of the hill when you start to hear the chains slowly go down and you begin to wonder why the hell you got on the ride in the first place. By then, though, it’s too late to get off and so […]
My note
I made a stupid decision.  I know it’s selfish, and I’m doing it for the stupidest reason.  I can’t help how I feel.  I have felt like this for a long time.  If you want to know why, Jackie has the full story.  She knows me better than anyone else.
To my mom and dad
I love both of you very much.  You were amazing parents.  I loved going to disney world.  I loved going to mexico.  I loved going on bike rides with you dad.  I grew distant from both of you, and i don’t entirely know why.  Over the past few years, I’ve […]
OK, so I’ve decided to start posting some of my writing. I’m going to try to post something every night. I think it might help me to share it, and maybe it might help some other people here in their journeys. At least, I hope it will.
What I’m posting tonight is the poem I get my username from. I figured that was a good place to start. I know it doesn’t rhyme, so it doesn’t count as real poetry or anything. I wrote this a few months ago.
ANY AND ALL FEEDBACK IS HIGHLY APPRECIATED! (Also, any suggestions for a title?)
These subtle bloodstains
Soak the whiteness to […]
I have been feeling like this for a while now, sleep walking through life with the thought of suicide as my only hope. Recently I have been planning something I’ve never thought of before. I’m 99% sure that this is what I want. But 1% is, shall we say, nagging me to get help…I suppose this is my pathetic attempt to do just that.
I need to end my life.
…help?
Hi I’m just a 15yrold girl who has already planed how she’s going to die Wich is for wen I’m 17 Wich is next year but with things going how they are I feel like waiting another year to leave is going to make things harder iv told only my closes friends about it but they don’t care like always they think I’m silly to think that. I may be silly to think it in there books and to have plned it so early. Why do it. Well I just can’t take it any more •being put down at school and at home • […]
I am soooo so behind in school work and I can’t concentrate on it at all. Iam always preoccupied with all these un clear thoughtsss.
It feels like time is running out
had to come home early couldnt stop crying
Breathing helps MARGINALLY .
I feel so guilty like I did something wrong, I don’t think I did but I CANT CONTROL THIS FEELING. I always find myself holding my breath and it helps
but I heard its not good to do this? I know I shouldn’t be feeling like this! But for some reason it feels like I deserve it.
I can’t even eat, no appetite but I think this makes me more nervous because my stomach starts growling, but when i do eat I feel like I’ll throw up.
I’ve tried everything. But i feel its involuntary.
 I want to escape.
Well I’ve been struggling with depression and suicide for a long time now as well as my own anger and hate of the people that bullied me my entire life in the name of their God. I have been at peace with death for a long time now and feel that it would be best and easier if I can just die peacefully. I’m waiting till I get back to my college dorm room for a couple days so I can get everything together for my family and few friends. I feel as if my emotional pain and mental illness are unbearable no matter what […]
have you already chosen a date ?
april 15th or 16th for me ..
my mom (04/06) and cousin (04/11) birthdays are coming up and I don’t want to fuck it up for them .. after the 11th, I’ll have ran out of concern for people feelings .. they’re grown enough to grasp I cannot contribute to their well-being when I’m dead inside and have become very negative .. it’s funny because if I had a child, I’m not sure I’d have considered suicide as an option till (s)he’s at least 20 .. anyway: death, life, politics, religion, fuck all of it
give me death or […]