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iThink – I’m tired of the existing reality – I

  December 27th, 2010 by iThink


Before i start to share my though’s with you i must say that my inglish is not very good, and i don’t f**** care.

I wont give you any of my life details, background or something like that.I’m 20 old done not to long ago and iThink i’m tired of this reality. It started not to long ago. Actualy i found my self in a bad shaped live condition, and this is meybe affecting my psych and emotional state, since i’m a very sensibel person, may not look at the first aparition.

I don’t think of suicide or death, i’m happy to live and breath. I got …

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want to give up

  December 27th, 2010 by tiredoftrying

I suppose I am writing this not because I am unsure of whether or not I want to end my life. I am writing this because I want to know if there is a way to let those that care about me that this is not their fault and to comfort them. One of the main reasons I have chosen to end my life is because I can’t stand to see those who care about me in pain because of me. I know that ending my life would cause them pain but I feel it would be less. I believe this …

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friends huh…

  December 27th, 2010 by ...

well since im clearly not the most confident with person with the oh so bright personality, i seek the few appraisals from my friends that i can get. i help all my friends not completely because i think that i should but also because deep down inside i want a thank you to make me feel bettr about myself. all these years when ive helped ppl thats wat i probably really wanted. but, the worst thing that can happen is when u reach out for a friend who needs help and they shoot u down. this isnt one of those oh u can sense it …

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A Few Questions…

  December 27th, 2010 by Violet Blake

How in this world can we put a man on the moon,and still have a need for a place like St Jude’s?
Why is one woman born in a place where all they know is war, and a girl like me has always been free?

And how can two people who built a lovin’ home, try for years and never have a child of their own?
When somewhere out there tonight, there’s a baby no-one’s holdin’ tight: In need of love.
To me, that don’t add up.

But I wasn’t there the day you filled up the oceans.
I didn’t get to see you hang the stars in the sky.
So I …

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Need to sharpen my knife

  December 27th, 2010 by solange

Anyone have tips for sharpening knives? It seems a bit on the dull side for my liking.

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I’m sorry

  December 27th, 2010 by delonge182

I’m 14, I’ve been hospitalized before and I’m fucked up. I’m sick of living cause all I do is live for disappointment. I’m a curse to everyone around me, I can’t get a girlfriend, and none of my friends need me. I don’t want to live and im looking for something to live for that won’t back down like everyone else does.

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  December 27th, 2010 by Aeroninzanity

i thought i knew
who you were.
cold eyes decived
me and i belive your
you told me so many
things i know wish
were true. but now
they r like my dreams.
i cant help but to cut.
all i wanted was you
and you dissaperard
side like smoke. now
i am drenched from
but you dont know
that. for you were
gone as soon as i said
those words “i love you”

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What to do now???

  December 26th, 2010 by Nikki

Need a little help with like or love idk which

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Permanent water drops on my face

  December 26th, 2010 by already_dead

I’ve been alone, really for real, my whole life.
I was born to death. I killed myself to make everybody pay.
I never knew anyone, but if I did them would all be dead.
Life is a huge pit, swallowing everyone up.
I see the good, but it’s always in evil.
I’ve made hate to a clown.
I’ve stayed awake so long my eyes stop bleeding.
Life is bullshit.
See YOU in the pit.

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really tired and …

  December 26th, 2010 by abcd123

feeling really tired about a month…
feeling really suicidal since my age is 12…
(my age is currently 16)
always were said “i don’t want to live” to God.

the last tree year were good and still but i was really asoical and currently i am in social place and school.

Basically, i can’t play football, i can’t help my mother, i can’t speak english much more, i can’t have a friend in native way, i can’t make me understant someting and i can’t make you understant.

I love to be sad, i can’t be happy… and i don’t have really good friend even i love all girls in the world…

I …

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Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbors Wife

  December 26th, 2010 by DanielJackson

I’m a firm believer that everything written in the Bible was written by people just trying to make a positive difference for the era of the time.  It shows its age today with some completely nonsensical demands.  And yet, there is still wisdom to be found in it if you look at it.  For far too long, I’ve been comparing myself to the lives and achievements of others.  I’ve been holding them up and measuring myself against the best of them.  Why do I do this?  Why do I fall into this trap?  My life is my life, no matter where it takes me.  Their …

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Hey Everyone.

  December 26th, 2010 by Aaron

Found this site on a random search. So sad to be here around Christmas. So sad to see so many posts like this around Christmas. It sounds like this is the place for me though. I recently lost my entire family in a pretty complicated and ‘hard to explain in a few sentences’ way. Living grief has destroyed me. While I don’t specifically want to die, I am done with my life. The pain of living each day has become overwhelming enough that while I recognize death will end all future possibility for joy and continuation of existence, it will put an end to this …

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Well…this is me…

  December 26th, 2010 by brokenhearts27

its me in a short story…

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Things I’ll Never Say

  December 26th, 2010 by Violet Blake

“I love you” to the boy who left with my heart.

“I hate you” to the man who I blame for ruining my childhood.

“I’m sorry” to my mother for trying to kill myself.

“I forgive you” to my father.

“I want you to never leave” to my best friend.

“I wish you had never died” to Alyson.

“I regret everything” to the boy who took my virtue away.

“You’re most of the reason I’m alive” to all my true friends who care.

“I’m fine” to my family.

“Go to hell” to everyone who ever made me want to end it all.

And lastly, to everyone on this sight who has brought me nothing but …

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  December 26th, 2010 by KlashingKamille

It half past midnight in the shittiest small-town in the world.I feel so unwanted, and no matter how happy i get, its only for a little while, and my happiness is always over-shadowed by my ‘Depression’.

I hate that they have the power to label a jar, shove me in it, and shove that jar containing me in a cupboard they’ll forget about. I want happy pills, not fucking St. Johns Wort, that stupid organic mood-booster just gives me headaches.

I hate myself.

For a while i blamed other for being the reason i feel sad, tormented, hurt, always hurting and empty.

But i realize i’ve done it to …

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How to leave?

  December 26th, 2010 by Shanny

Can death truly be the only way out,
because at the moment it’s all I see.
Other options seem to be non-existent,
But this choice leaves me feeling so distant.

In the dark I wait for a time to leave,
And decided on a way to go.
I cry as I wait in silence,
And pray for some help or guidance.

I am certain of the path I wish to choose,
But unsure of how people will feel.
I hate to think of who they will blame,
And if they will feel a sense of shame.

There are many ways to leave this life,
But how, I cannot choose.
I am always an indecisive person,
But …

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  December 26th, 2010 by loreildarksky

You see nothing more
Than what I choose to show
You see a calm shore
When I’m really drowning

Why is it that I can’t say
What’s really bothering me?
It as if the thing that’s in the way
Is my perception

You know only what I
Choose to tell you
And even then it’s what I
Didn’t want to

Why is it that I can’t say
What’s really bothering me?
What’s really in the way
Is both you and I

I fear this crumbling act
More than I choose to show
And I fear how you’ll act
If you ever know

Is this why I can’t say
What’s really bothering me?
This shadowed ray
Of my life

I want to tell you
Everything there is to tell
But somehow …

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I am a dissapointment to everyone around me, including myself.

  December 26th, 2010 by Jimbo71

I am 19, currently going to college. Live at home w/ my dad and mom. I am an only child. I am a disappointment to both my parents and myself. My mom told me this christmas i was a disappointment late at night. I am not a social person i stay in my room when not in school. Ever since I could remember I have been doing shitty at school and at anything I have ever tried. I hate being around people and have to fake small talk. My whole life I have been basically acting my way through. I act how i think I …

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realtionship help please

  December 26th, 2010 by XxSoon2BGonexX

I cant handle my feelings anymore, and I dont know what to do. Heres the thing. I was engaged to (lets call him Brandon). and he broke up with me a month ago. I love this kid with all my heart. and I can’t get over him. 3weeks later, i found out that my best friend (Lets call him Jake) liked me. So we started dating exactly 3weeks after. ..Im really only dating him cuz i feel like i need to get over Brandon, he has had 2 girlfriends since we broke up, one of which was my worst enime (she had put Brandon and …

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  December 26th, 2010 by StrawberryThyme

Tried to tell you, with all of my talk about death.
Tried to show you, but never in seriousness.
I hurt you and I’ll never let myself forget
How more people get hurt, the closer I get.

It’s so hard to find yourself in the shadows,
So I just settled for keepin’ the door closed.
Keepin’ secret the thoughts that rush through my head,
All the nights I’ve stayed up, thinkin’ “I should be dead.”

I love you but it seems like I’m always falling.
I turned into a person who’s always name-calling,
And bitching and whining and hurting you all.
Time to find somewhere high and just… fall.

So I’m trying …

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