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I Hate Myself, I Hate This World, Somebody Help Me

August 2nd, 2010by TheSicilian33

I’m currently a 20 year old living in New Jersey, and I suffer from bipolar disorder. I got kicked out of my house, and I live at my fiancee’s house. She hates me, my friends hate me, and bascially everyone hates me. My medicine never works, and I’m always very depressed not doing what I do daily. I got in a fist fight with my best friend, and it has become worse. I’ve abused my fiancee because of all the pain I have caused, and I want to end my life. She understands why I did it, but doesn’t know how to react. Someone please …

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i ruin everything

August 2nd, 2010by ReNDeR

the title says it all.
those words came out of someones mouth who also wants me to be able to tell them everything and anything thats bothering me.

thats okay.

confusion makes the straight edges easier to wield.
in the long run, i don’t matter, i know this.

)if i grow up anymore, i’ll fucking die)

you’ll never find this, cruel world, you’ll also move on, and be happier.
they think i am just a drama case.
they’ll never see me for who i am.

silence is deadly, and a favorite among those who don’t really care.

i’ve been holding back, but it wont be long now.

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My fault

August 1st, 2010by 77evergone77

It’s all my fault,
Every last drop you drink,
Has me to blame.

It’s my fault,
When the room starts to spin,
And you start to giggle,
Just a little too hard,
To be normal.

It’s always been my fault,
That your becoming, 
almost as fuked up as me.
That in the end,
Your the one in need of a true friend.

We shared so many secrets.
And made so many promises.
But it my fault I can’t keep it,
The one promise I made,
To never give up and die,
To never say goodbye.

Everythings my fault,
I’m to blame,
Just give me some time, 
to hang my head in shame,
Before it hangs from that noose again.

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August 1st, 2010by chloegonzalez155

im losing somebody i love who helped me through the years of pain who was there 2 comfort me when i came home from school crying bcuz i was being bullied teased or made fun of i was hated for what i looked like and constantly beaten up all the time nobody helped me so i always cried 2 my parents and they wud tell me im just faking using it as an excuse so i wont go 2 school, each night i wud hide in my room 2 cry and cut myself on my wrists nobody cared for my pain i go through it …

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im just tired

August 1st, 2010by williamparris

first,excuse me my english is not tht good…i came to the US from a southamerican country,6 months after i got here i meet n started living with this amazing girl,she treated me like a king,she love me like no one before n i was an idiot,i was in love with her,and i show it to her during the first 2 years,even though from the beginning i wasnt all tht caring to her…i just lost her 8 months ago,after 6 years together…i miss her so much,i miss her voice,her smile,how silly she can be…i dont even know where she is anymore,ive try to find her just …

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August 1st, 2010by Jordan D

Everyday i wait for my life to change and it dont even thou i want to commit succide i have always feared death i dont have no friends hardly cant never get no girls i feel possed in the head even thou im a nice guy which makes me feel even words i concimplate sucidide dailey but never can get the guts up to do it

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August 1st, 2010by Brittany

I wanted to get other people’s opinions on dreams. Ocaisionally, when I sleep, I won’t dream at all, I don’t understand why. The majority of the time though, I have really good dreams, dreams where I’m happy and surrounded by people who love me; however, when I wake up I feel really depressed. I personally w0uld rather have a terrible dream, then wake up to reality and be content with it, considering that it is much better than what I was just dreaming of opposed to having a good dream, and then waking up to realize that none of it was real, and I’m still …

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August 1st, 2010by layton39

I decided to commit suicide over a month ago. I’ve been preparing and now I am spending my last couple of weeks doing this;

I am not going to work, I am spending money on all my favourite food, music and films. Today for instance, I have cleaned up my house, and myself (I was a bit of a mess), and went shopping. I have just eaten my favourite meal and I intend to snack all day. I am lying here on the sofa, listening to the wind blowing outside, and watching the trees, I am about to put on a f@cking great film. I feel …

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i want to disappear

August 1st, 2010by meandmymisery

i hate life.  if i was given the chance to end it right now, i wouldnt think twice about it. i just want to not exist anymore. i dont want to commit suicide incase i fail and become a vegitable or just be know as the attention seeker. because i am not seeking attention. i have never told anybody how i feel. i feel unloved and empty most days. i feel guilty most days as i have a good life, good friends, mom who loves me. and i am an ungrateful *****. but i feel like each day is just a drag. i dont think …

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Fuck You!

August 1st, 2010by Scilin

I hate it all, everything is ona nonstopn decline friends truth trust loyalty they are only fucking words but at tis point it’s not suicide I want to die but not before them all of them, I wanna punish them by sim[ly smiling knowing I will outlive you’re cock sucking self my hate drives me only when it is gone can I die still fuck them all once again fuck them fuck them fuck them! if there is a god I hope he can peer into the true darkness of hatred as I will be left smiling truly for the first time in a long …

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bull crap

August 1st, 2010by oscar13x2

i feel like crap… my girl friend or baby mother keeps tellin me that im a piece of crap a no good father and jus makes me want to end my life an im tired of the way she isi have tried my best since we have been together to chill out but i cant its been like this ever since she started her job and thinks she is better than me… when on the other hand im the one that to care of her and HER son for three years…. i dont know wat to do i feel like i dont need to be …

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To be or Not to be?

July 31st, 2010by lotuss

I have been feeling very low over the past few weeks. The emptiness in me growing.  My fatigue worsens – as it is not physical but in my mind.  I feel all of my age and several more.  I am isolating myself from family and acquaintances. Can’t claim to have friends and don’t think I have any foes either.  What have I done about all this?   Not very much – I made my first enquiries about Dignitas. Stayed out last night.  Today first I thought I will go for a walk to waterside to clear my head – not likely to happen when I don’t live …

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Extra Person

July 31st, 2010by Extra Person

Today, again I feel endless. It’s as if I am stuck in a jar and there is no way to escape. I stare catatonic into space and feel my body crushing. I can’t cry anymore..I am too sad. I rock back and forth and hyperventilate. The loss is so palpable that I cannot bear it. Mostly, I feel regret. I have built a reputation as a unstable person who has tried to kill herself many times and has flown into rages. Many people eschew me. Many more talk about me. I am judged.
I lost my boyfriend and all the social activities and excitement about the …

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Let’s Pretend

July 31st, 2010by 77evergone77

Let’s pretend that nothing happened,
That the world is right,
That these marks arnt from that belt in your hands,
That tears arnt more common than rain.

Let’s pretend I’m okay,
The this blood isn’t mine,
Isn’t real.
That this blade is for cutting clothes,
Not me.
That these bruises and burns dont need to heal,
Because they were never made.

Let’s pretend that you never hurt me,
That I can still sleep at night.
That there are no nightmares,
No bloody visions,
That my screams are ones of delight.

Let’s pretend we can go back,
Before my art made me cry,
Before I wished I could die,
Before the wars at home,
That never seem to end.
Before the memories,
Of seeing a dying friend.

Let’s play …

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July 31st, 2010by thegirlwhostoppedtheworld

Suicide(v)-The deliberate taking of ones own life. 

I sit in the shadows hoping for someone to notice me. Hoping that someone will see the girl whose world spins all too fast. My so called best friends watch me and see the darkness that haunts me, they sit back as i crawl deeper into my shell. To them it is a joke, it is hilarious to them how often i fall apart. They see my bitterness as a mere form of entertainment. 

I laugh along as if my darkness is a choice as if i choose this hate, this heart wrenching pain, i pretend that its all a …

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i hate this world

July 31st, 2010by pradipan

i hate this world and the people in it……. i try to do everything honestly and end up on the loosing side………. or get misinterpreted by others……. even my luck betrays me all the time…… but i want to see till the end and how unforgiving life can be……

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This silence is my enemy

July 31st, 2010by The-girl-with-the-broken-soul

Everyday. It is the same monotonous cycle. Over and over again; a repetitive pounding like a drum beating holes into an already bruised mind. I’ve been working on it. For weeks now, I have been writing and re-writing a suicide note in my head. So far I only have seven lines. Seven lines of what is to be the end of my life. I suppose the only reason I have taken the time to post this, is for purely selfish reasons, I am sure. But I would just like to be able to imagine that there ARE intelligent people out in the world that

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To those who need help :

July 31st, 2010by Codename Dreamer

Those of you who need help/advice/or someone to talk to. My email is here. I will do everything I can to help you make sense of somethings and to be able to be more at terms with what is going. Good luck, and hope to hear from you. I will check my email every day or so, You can message me on msn if I am offline message anyways. I will still answer when I come back on.

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To tell you the truth…..

July 31st, 2010by lost_soul

…….. is to tell you the lies.

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What to do now?

July 31st, 2010by Nikki

Days started to finally have meaning. With a job and two friends to talk to everyday, everything is ok. For now. My parents are fighting all the time but thankfully the car is getting me out, but the thing that pisses me off the most is the shit I find out about my own family. My mom hates me because my dad is treating me better then my brother. My dad hates and does not want anything to do with him and lastly my brother is behind a shooting at my house that got me shot. I feel so loved. WRONG!!!I fight everyday to just …

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