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1

I Gave my Life Away to Others…

  October 18th, 2010 by PuttingOnAnAct

What scares me the most is that after all of these years, I take a rather pragmatic approach to determining the value of my life.  I am 29 years old and will turn 30 in a couple of months.

My financial situation worsened as a result of bad familial circumstances.  I no longer see a way out.  It seems life will always be a constant struggle because of the long-term impact of my choices.  I am so tired of struggling that I cannot justify choosing a lifetime of struggle, which is more than likely my future.

Throughout my 20s I lived with abusive alcoholics.  I still live …

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1

My Story

  October 18th, 2010 by Brenda B

I won’t go into detail as to what brought me to seriously consider suicide lately,  save to say a poster in a hospital room helped me to visually gauge my pain:

http://www.carolinashospital.com/_img/patient-info/reference-library/pain_chart.gif

Though meant to gauge physical pain, I used it to guage my emotional pain….and I was right there…between numbers 9 & 10.

(Matter of fact – I envisioned a red zone in between those two numbers and entitled it:  “The Danger Zone.”)

It scared me.  Scared me because, though many times in the past I have contemplated suicide….it was never quite to this serious, profound degree and this scared me.  Scared me enough to know that I …

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2

Exasperated.

  October 18th, 2010 by Firepith

Human existence is permeated with fear and ignorance that drives the fiction on which society bases itself.

The overwhelming majority of deluded co-dependent sheep has flooded the world with needless regulation that tramples any semblance of freedom. American freedom extends to religion and anyone willing and able to pay for more freedom. The individual is nothing but a name and a number to be herded.

I find it to be exceedingly frustrating to exist among these misguided fools. Their zealotry is a mental illness; an epidemic long gone out of control.

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3

I think I just need to write some of this

  October 18th, 2010 by blockhead

I’m hoping by writing this maybe some of my feelings can become a bit clearer.  Maybe someone wiser than myself will shed a bit of light on how I’m feeling and provide a different perspective.  But then again maybe  not.  I’m a pretty darn rational person and I find myself considering suicide more and more often.  Though, I just can’t see myself doing that to my remaining family.  So I’m not really at risk, just a miserable person.  I don’t honestly see things changing.  Things that we can control, we can change.  Things we don’t control, we can’t change.

Obviously, someone always has it worse, right?  …

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1

There’s Something I Need To Tell You…

  October 18th, 2010 by aic1397

My little brother has a history of behaviour ‘issues’ – he gets really really angry and violent and treats everyone with disrespect. Apparently it’s not normal for him to be throwing things at me, my mum and my dad, use foul language and say he wants to kill us.He was 7 when this stared. We started going to counselling when I was 9 and it really helped. I mean it didn’t just help him, it helped me too – it helped me to get on with things and deal with what was happening. My best friend was so supportive thoughout it all.

But this year things …

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8

The Smiths, Asleep…

  October 18th, 2010 by Shelly

A beautiful song by The Smiths. This is one of my all time favorite songs about suicide and wanting to die. I love it as it’s one of the handful of non metal songs about the subject so isn’t sensationalist but alot more reflective, thoughtful and melancholy and as such is far more powerful! So please enjoy it

 

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3

Daydreams/comtemplations

  October 18th, 2010 by RogueShadow1281

So, I’m tired of life. All I do is daydream because life is so dull. I feel like I fucked up my life and my brain. I have depression, my stepmom/stepbitch (as i like to call her) is a *****, my dads a moron, my brother’s annoying and my friends are more like enemies. I fell in love with this perfect girl since 3rd grade and would think about her all the time. she rejected me on myspace. it devastated me. i tried marijuana and theres a chance it fucked my brain up, maybe im just paranoid. now i sit and dream as i stare …

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11

exit bag or anything

  October 17th, 2010 by unfixable

Goes anyone know how to use the exit bag properly.
I read the final exit and it mentioned a regulator. Does the party baloon kit have one on the tank. Aslo, Do I need sleeping pils or does the helium knock you out. How do I stop my brains instinct to pull the bag off. If you use industrial gases do they need a regulator and what to I tell them I need it for.Any idea on carbon carbon monoxide from a bbq in the cae.I’m 61 and fought depression for decades, lately it’s gooten out of controm. I’m seen therapists, taken evey meds doctors have …

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0

I’m here, to listen, and guide

  October 17th, 2010 by LastLife

You don’t know me and you don’t have to know me but how ever your feeling I’ve been there and its sucks to be alone, to lose a smile, to lose that one thing that made your heart exsist. Im here if you need someone

Skype: Danyiel.Arkady

Aim: NoHart126

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0

i wanna death

  October 17th, 2010 by lionheart

how much cynide or silver phosphide can kill me? i am very sick from last 3 years

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6

Talking to the Moon

  October 17th, 2010 by Violet Blake

I went to visit my father over the break. I haven’t seen him since the summer but things between us are starting to get better.

Sort of…

The person I was really looking forward to seeing though is my old best friend Jimmy Wilder. We used to be so close when we were kids. We were in the same first grade class and I remember the teacher always scolding Jimmy for being too noisy or too obnoxious or too….Well, like Jimmy is. She would always ask me the same old question every single day, “Violet, how can someone as sweet as you stand to be around someone as annoying as …

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4

Desperate

  October 17th, 2010 by unfixable

For what it’s worth, I’m 61.I have battled depression since I was 14. I spent almost all my adult years self- medicating with drugs, mostly alcohol for the last 40+ years on a daily basis. I’ve been in treatment 4 times but always relapsed. About 3 years ago I noticed my cognitive skills and memory we taking a dive. I qut drinking ( except for a few breif relapses).I began seeing a psychologist for 2 years(i’d been in therapy before) . Not long after I started seeing the psychologist, I started seeing psychiatrists, again. I’ve had my regular doctors prescribe medications that did nothing. …

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3

  October 17th, 2010 by john.doe

For being such a grumpy bunch we all seem to have quite a lot to say.

I wonder what makes the bit about actually getting dead so tricky.

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8

One is the Loneliest Number

  October 16th, 2010 by Violet Blake

I tend to hold in my feelings a lot of the time, and that results in giant outbursts of emotion later on.

I thought that when Aly died things would be okay, that I would be ok, but I can see now that they’re not, I’m not.

Alyson was my whole life, the only person I really trusted everything with, and the next person besides her would’ve been Drake, my guy best friend.

Now they’re both gone.

It’s hard to forget the people who walk into your life, even if they walk out of it just as quickly as they came in, because they leave a scar. I only …

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1

exit bag

  October 16th, 2010 by unfixable

I want to us the exit bag as talked about in the final exit. Do I need to add a regulator. Do I need to take sleeping pills while I’m holding the bag open with my thumbs. Once I become unconscious
that prevents me from pulling the bag off even though I’m unconscious

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0

Using the exit bag

  October 16th, 2010 by unfixable

I have read the final exit and I’m confused. Does is need a regulator. Can I use the helium baloon kis found at party stores.Do I have to take pill to be unconscious or will the helium knock me out. What can I do tp prevent me from pulling the bag off when unconscious.

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3

“Suicidal Heart”

  October 16th, 2010 by Gina12123

   My heart will always feel hurt & be empty, as i will be alone & sad  forever, afraid of life, I will take my own life away from me cause it was never meant to be for me – to be happy in life.

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5

my sadness as if a bystander

  October 16th, 2010 by fireflieslite

while Chen was first running for election of Taiwanese presidency, his deportment like a pheasant only laying out a sure short-cut to his benefit if a phoenix-like of presidency he would turn into, soon his corruption leading to his prison for life was never a surprise for me.

And what about a sly monkey-face in the eagle kingdom was to be elected, I then said its people would be in hell of disasters.

There are always tell-tale signs.
It’s just what you are, then what you’ll show on the look.
So ?
Could I alone overturn the votes of the vast majority ? No.
I could only say, when you choose …

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2

WE ARE ALL COMMITING SUICIDE

  October 16th, 2010 by LittleLisaMassacre

NO MATTER WHAT YOUR DOING IN LIFE WETHER YOU WANT TO OR NOT WE ARE ALL DYING OF SUICIDE WE ALL DO THINGS THAT CAUSES US TO DIE WETHER ITS IN A LONG PERIOD OF TIME OR A SHORT PERIOD OF TIME SOME OF US JUST WANNA GO QUIKER THAN OTHERS

WHILE IM ON HERE TYPING I DONT UNDERSTAND ALL OF YOU WITH YOUR I WANNA DIE WITH NO PAIN NO MATTER HOW YOU TRY AND KILL YOURSELF ITLL HURT CAUSE YOU AND YOUR BRAIN WILL TELL YOUR BODY ITLL HURT SO YOU CANT GO THE WONG WAY WITH ANY SUICIDE ITLL ALL TURN OUT LIKE …

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14

nothing works

  October 15th, 2010 by mar0304

I lost my father to suicide in 1997.  He was 84, lonely, and depressed.  It was not a surprise to me.

I lost my son to suicide in 2007.  He was 24, well educated, intellegent, successful, had just been promoted with the police dept he was an officer with.  Had just bought his first house.  And I still can’t believe it happened.

I am 47.  I have felt different.  Lonely, yet want to be alone.  Always stressed, even over little things others don’t let get to them.  I have been in therapy off and on for most of my adult life.  I have been on many medications.  …

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