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2

hmm….

January 7th, 2010by wishicould

just a thought, dont people always tell everyone to “listen to your heart” or “do what you wanna do” or “do what is going to make you happy” what about for those of us whose hearts scream for death, we want to die, and we’d be happier dead, why do these things we are told not apply then?

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13

i cant even breathe…im ready to die

January 7th, 2010by takemefaraway

so far i forgot how to be myself and i cant remember what i ever wanted outta life.

i cut myslef last night… it wouldnt stop bleeding and i admit that for once i was kinof afraid but comfortable with the thought od dying. i’d never have to be alone again and i could do things without worrying about everyone…

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5

i have gone too far

January 7th, 2010by abbygone

i have no way to go now….

what can i say? i dont know what do! there is this whole that rips me apart every night…i thought i was doing a good job not cutting but know…..i see the knife, scissors, even mirrors and there is a voice inside telling me to do, that i  need it……

tell what i am supposed to do! i thought i would be all good now but……i feel alone and sad all the time and there is no apparent reason for it! i am just sad depressed…

i stared writting poems again and they all talk about pain, suicide, sorrow, hate, monsters, …

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6

I just washed up here

January 7th, 2010by A FREAK

So this is my post. Im 15, and half dead. This is the only place i can find to talk about my feelings. I had a friend who I first told was suicidal and at the time he became my best friend and helped me. But now he has seemed to have gotten anoyed with helping me. I have become a burden to him it seems. Im still his friend I guess, but I sometimes wonder if he helped me only because he felt sorry for me and thought this was just a phase. He was my last hope, and now he is starting to …

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4

please let God help you

January 7th, 2010by whydiebeforeyourtime@gmail.com

“Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” – Jesus, Matthew 11:28

hey everyone.

i don’t have too much to say but i’ll start off by mentioning that this post isn’t at all for myself.

there are a lot of people who come to this site and write down their experiences/situations for others to read, but many of us here don’t really receive help.

the only way things fall away from goodness is because of a lack of God.   so basically what i’m trying to say is that if you really want to make your life and

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3

just bored

January 6th, 2010by wishicould

i dont want people to try to make me feel better right now. i just feel like typing. im ready for things to get better, im depressed, lonely, a cutter, suicidal, bulimic,fat,and have no self esteem. i feel like theres only one escape.

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3

Saved by the bell?maybe, not sure.

January 6th, 2010by readytoctb

I thought today would be the day I would start to put things in motion. That today I would begin the countdown for when I would CTB. The plan was set, it was just a matter of gathering what I needed and setting a date and time, but life has gotten in the way. I received the most microscopic slivers of hope today and I am not sure what to do. Do I continue with what I have planned or do I delay and see if this .001% chance of redemption becomes more. I feel I owe it to myself to wait and see, but …

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5

i’m alone

January 6th, 2010by ....

nobody cares about how i feel

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2

?

January 6th, 2010by gtr

the only reason i have not done it is because I dont want to hurt my parents.

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7

method of bliss

January 6th, 2010by wishicould

all in good time
all in good measure
all in pursuit
of the perfect endevor

the perfect endevor
the blade to the skin
the much needed feeling
of how it bites in

how it bites in
better feelings arent missed
its the incontent human’s
method of bliss

i wrote this while i was in a “treatment center” for adolocents. i was there for about a week. even after being “treated” i still feel this way. i write alot of poetry but this is by far my favorite that ive ever written.

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3

suicide is painless.

January 6th, 2010by takemefaraway

everything is FUCKEDUP.

i’ve learned to trust no one.

do i disgust you yet? do i make you sick to your stomach.

if i decided to ler go, would you care? would you acknowledge the fact that i did this and theres no turning back?

you make everything in life so hard.

i dont have to question my sanity simply because i know im not crazy.

just utterly misunderstood.

in your eyes im no one.

not a daughter. a sister. a friend, an enemy.

i’ll fake a smile for a little while longer and maybe once im gone, you’ll see

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3

if i could be anywhere in the world…..

January 6th, 2010by takemefaraway

everyday i look at myslef and tyhe scars i have. i’ve cut so deep and i loved the feeling. i am alone and all i have is myself. my dad died when i was 7, my family turned against me…..its like whats the point to live when theres nothing good to live for? i ask myslef why the hell am i still here. a 16 year old craving an escape from the pain…

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9

long ass story. probably not worth your time.

January 6th, 2010by wishicould

im done bitching about my life for now. i just need to vent. im not looking for pity or “salvation” just a place to let it out. i would appreciate if you didnt leave rude comments. when i was 4, my parents seperated i had no clue what was going on all i knew was that my mommy and daddy were fighting all the time. i knew i was being fought over. i heard my name and my brothers name shouted constantly. my brother and i were dragged around through numerous custody fights and eventually they settled on joint custody. as some of you may …

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5

please let me help you

January 5th, 2010by whydiebeforeyourtime@gmail.com

hey everyone.

i don’t have too much to say but i’ll start off by mentioning that this post isn’t at all for myself.

there are a lot of people who come to this site and write down their experiences/situations for others to read, but many of us here don’t really receive help.

the only way things fall away from goodness is because of a lack of God.   so basically what i’m trying to say is that if you really want to make your life and yourself better, you need Him, and you need Him more than just an hour a week.

if you’d like to talk about Him

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3

Number What?

January 5th, 2010by sbeck1981

My pain feels so unique until I get onto the internet. On nights like this, when I’m home by myself and need any outlet, no matter how pathetic, to the outside world and I turn to the computer, I am amazed and infuriated by how many people suffer as I do. Of course, I operate under the delusion that nobody *quite* suffers in the same way I do, but that is not to say it’s not to the same degree: just a different set of ingredients. I feel my mix is particularly bitter.

I am just your average twenty-something white girl, with complaints that make …

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3

Well…

January 5th, 2010by kaitlynsierra

I just heard my parents talking, and this is the third time I’ve over heard them speaking.

The first time, my mom was telling my dad that he was losing his family.

And all my dad said was whatever.

The second time, they were fighting about the fact that all my dad likes to do is get high, and how having a family “stresses” him out.

And just now, they were talking about how my dad doesn’t want to be here and apparently he has a plan to leave my mom.

I haven’t cut in about, four months, but all of this, is making that not even matter.

I’m so ready …

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4

hey

January 5th, 2010by asdf

GOD i want to express myself so much , but i just cant find the right fucking words …. ive been writting huge paragraphs and deleting them and starting over for bout and hour now … i want to express my feelings and my life thoroully but i cant put it fucking together ….

i read these stories below and those little paragraphs and i can really feel the pain these people have .. when i read what lives they have , and look at mine i feel like its a mistake writing here and that you guys will just think im a moron and that …

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6

a poem

January 5th, 2010by whiteylover

I’ve done the best i possibly can,
To try and make you understand.
But no one seems to really see,
That a certain something, is destroying me.

It’s something that engulfs your life,
Makes you want to pick up a knife.
Its something that takes away your faith,
And makes you feel so unsafe.

I’m not sure how much more i can take,
Before i crumble, and before i break.
I managed to fight it by myself,
With a smile i pretended to be somebody else.
But its at the stage im losing hope,
I’m giving up, i cant seem to cope.

This thing is painfully ruining me,
Controlling my life happily.
Im not living – Im surviving,
And inside im slowly

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6

Ehhhhhhh.

January 5th, 2010by kaitlynsierra

I actually just found this website today, and I figured it seemed like a good idea to try. After reading some of the other posts though I feel a little intimidated, to be honest. I don’t really know what to write, so I guess I should start at the beginning.
When I was in fourth grade, my parents split up. They just weren’t happy anymore I guess. So my dad moved into his mother, my grandmother’s house, and my mom stayed at our house. They didn’t divorce, they were just having a “temporary situation”…I lived with my mom at our house with my older sister, and …

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5

Listen…

January 5th, 2010by takemefaraway

since i was younger, I never felt good enough for anyone. I was always being made fun of and put down. I admit that I’m very sensetive. I couldn’t take it & I tried… I didnt succeed. When suicide just wasn’t working, cutting was my new thing. With every tear shed, a new cut formed. I was alone and empty. Had nobody to save me besides myself..I was destroying me & i didn’t care…Never have & never will I guess..doesn’t change anything..

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