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16

torn

  August 23rd, 2010 by SoVeryTired

It’smy son’s 17th birthday today. For his sake, for his birthday, I dragged myself out of bed to talk to him before he went to school. We were talking and laughing even though I was screaming inside with pain. He is such a handsome and wonderful young man, and the thought of leaving him without a mum is unbearable. At the same time, the thought of living on is equally unbearable. Nothing but pain. Who else is out there who lives _only_ in order to spare his/her loved ones the pain. My plan is still to kill myself in a few days, and today …

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1

Why would you want to end so young? Because I hate life…

  August 23rd, 2010 by LunaLayla

I get this stupid question all the frecken time. I’ve tried to kill myself more than ten times and people always ask this, “Why die so young?” “You’ve barley lived a day much less a life to end?” And so many more pointless questions. I first tried when I was thirteen to kill myself, I cut my arms so deep and in so many places that they had to do a blood transfusion. I was in treatment for ten months and now I am out but I still want to die. How easy it was to lie my way out of the stupid system. There’s …

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1

Please God don’t let me wake up to another day

  August 23rd, 2010 by sammy

please please please please give me the strength to end it. I am stopped by this fear of what will happen when I’m dying, will I suffer, will I see a devil and all that bullcrap that this sick and twisted world has fed me all my life. Please God I’m begging you to give me the strength to do this tonight, I cannot bear the weight of another day. I am praying through the internet in the hope that it reaches you and I draw some strength. I’m on my knees in horrific pain and torment, begging to be released from this hell. Please …

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5

is Humanity too dumb, or in simpler words, are most people just too dumb to realize the most essential things for better world?

  August 23rd, 2010 by niki

Every time I come to see a new post about someone sharing his/her pain in life, my heart can’t help but feeling much pain too (even if I never know that person in real life). And there are so much, so many people that seems to believe that DEATH is ultimately the ‘Answer’, that of what would be the true resting place, the true door, or even the true world/dimension of ultimate pureness to live, unlike this “damn corrupt & sickening” earthly life caused/polluted mostly by ‘stupid, clueless, dumb, egoistical’ humans, so they said.

Every all wise gurus of this world (be it Buddha, Jesus, etc) …

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5

The problem with spiritual enlightenment is

  August 23rd, 2010 by cathy

that most entirely misunderstand it’s message. It is an awakening of your spirit from your physical body – of course these two things can be connected, but the problem we have in this world is that it simply does not cater for enlightenment, so there is NOWHERE for it to go other than to manifest into another form of material belonging. From there it will bring you depressions, anger and feelings of hopelessness. 

The only way to be living in your spiritual self, in this world that does not cater for you, is to live beyond it, either in death (and the fear of death is …

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7

It doesn’t get better I’m afraid

  August 23rd, 2010 by anna_

I’m 48 and my ‘depression’ started about 25 years ago. I was never diagnosed as bipolar or anything, just occasionally put on anti-depressants. I got better many times and enjoyed life, but always kind of knowing that ‘all was not well really’. I’m attractive and have friends and family, I’ve always done what I want to do more than what society wants me to do. I am very spiritual and as least materialistic as society allows (to the point of not starving on the streets). 

I want to tell you all, that if you feel suicidal because the world just isn’t what you think it should be, …

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1

hAtrEd

  August 23rd, 2010 by Li

It hurts everything just plainly hurts.

I hate.

I seeth. 

I sleep. 

And than I wake up as it starts all over again

I don’t know why but theres this bitter hatred, a part of me is unforgiving to them all. My brother, my sister, my mother, my father. Everyone. Its this hate. When I talk with them, I remember horrible times that have happened. And I hate.

Everything just seems so unreal, fake, as if this world is just turning and turning waiting for something to happen. And me, I continue this monotonus cycle of hate, never forgiving, never forgetting, always hating. That’s all it is. This endless stupid cycle! I …

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1

If the story doesn’t go on,…it ends.

  August 23rd, 2010 by Sussi

I probably shouldn’t even consider death as an option, I got a wonderful wife and two adorable daughters. I know I’m needed as a father, sometimes as a husband, but that is not enough for me. I want to win in life and if my family is like food for my well being, then success on the work side of life is like water. Ever since I finished my secondaries, I’ve just been jobbing around, even if I was good at what I was doing, there was always something to take me out. Now I’m 35 jobless again since 1.5 years, considering my age my …

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2

My entire family saw me as a curse (catholics)

  August 23rd, 2010 by nikoda

I was the 2nd illegitimate child of an irish woman in the 1960’s. Both she and her family hated me more than her ‘first mistake’. I am still haunted by this at age 41. A father of three children and a moderately successful entrepreneur witha good education that I got between beatings and humiliation.

I was beaten with savagery and my now grown up siblings are parents and choose to deny my existence than admit the fun they had in the entire debacle.

I know that it was a form of abuse on them too but at the time they loved it and I was a great …

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13

I am about to give up

  August 23rd, 2010 by SoVeryTired

Hi, I have been reading posts for the last few days. I am a 45 year old mother of two teenagers, and have been emotionally and sexually abused in my first marriage, for 12 years. Although this is now more than 10 years ago, now it has come back to haunt me. I’ve had depression before, but this time it is very serious, I’ve been in and out of a psychiatric hospital this year, been seriously depressed for about a year now. Today I more or less decided that enough is enough, and I will end my life in the next few days. Tomorrow is …

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1

i’m so tired

  August 23rd, 2010 by loser37

I’m so tired of fighting, I’m trying and going to write a letter for my 5 year old son, so when I do finally off myself he would get an understanding of why and I just hope he will forgive me for what I’m going to do, it will be in the past when he does read it, I’m so tired of fighting and losing in life, I used to think that I could win but the odds have always been against me, yeah I’ve always spent too much on him, and most times went with out food, fuel in my car, or even cigarettes, …

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0

for those who want to commit suicide, what you really need is perhaps just be more open-mind & keep searching

  August 23rd, 2010 by niki

And maybe *that* is your ‘Purpose’ for your existence, for YOU to ‘feel’ all these ‘sensitive’ things. to USE it, to HARNESS it, and to connect with similar, like-minded souls (you will find! as already proven in this website, of how you can seemingly relate with each other here.)

Also, somebody said it right here that sometimes all you really deeply need is just this piece of information(s),..that might open your mind, and change your perspective when viewing this earthly Life (internet is great. use it).
I will share some of my ‘findings’ that I’ve found during my life-journey, and really wish/hope it could perhaps provide as …

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10

kyleprosser

  August 22nd, 2010 by samS

You’re an idiot, please do mankind a favour and don’t post on here anymore.

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1

You’re suicidal because you are in danger

  August 22nd, 2010 by Dev

Pay attention. You are not unwell. Research your future, do it now. The only answer you need is there. Please open your eyes and ears and listen to the ones risking their own lives to get messages to you.

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3

Completely Lost

  August 22nd, 2010 by AussieMatty

Hey Guys,

I don’t know why I’m writing this, who its for, who it’s to. I don’t know much about anything these days, nothing that matters anyway. I feel pre-programmed, living life as a ghost. I feel completely alone even when surrounded by people. I don’t know why, I don’t understand. I’m athletic and fit, studying at uni, working in a good job, pretty popular and liked by a lot of people. But it doesnt matter, it never has. I feel like I should be happy, but hide behind forced smiles & fake gestures.

I feel like I’m living a lie, wearing a mask to protect others, …

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4

Death by caffeine

  August 22nd, 2010 by Jed

I didn’t know this but it’s true. Obviously not in the form of coffee cause you would need so much that your belly would burst. But the pills are easy to get in the chemist. There’s a website here that tells you how much caffeine you need if you insert your weight into it.

http://www.energyfiend.com/death-by-caffeine

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3

Bye guys

  August 22nd, 2010 by harry

I’ve decided to go ahead with it. It’s been good reading these posts and participating in them. I know I am making the right decision, for me. Good luck everyone and I really hope you find your peace.

Harry

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6

Proof that the more intelligent you are, the more likely you are to commit suicide

  August 22nd, 2010 by thomas

From Times Online
Only the bright commit suicide
Does a controversial theory linking intelligence with suicide rates help to explain why so many scientists kill themselves?
THE PAST few months have seen a series of notable suicides by scientists. Yesterday we heard details of the strange pact in which Dr Michael Griffin and his wife Adele took their lives in a Devon hotel. Two days before that, Harold Shipman killed himself. Early this month the body of Richard Stevens, a haematologist, was found in the Lake District; we await the Hutton report into the suicide of Dr David Kelly.

These are disparate cases: no one seeks to associate a mass …

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7

Moderation

  August 22nd, 2010 by time

I like MANY others on here are wondering about the state of moderation on the site. I posted a valid reponse to a serious question and it has been held up for over 24hrs now whilst total gibberish that someone posted the other day which said something repetitive for the entire post was displayed immediately.

What is going on?

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7

Commit suicide

  August 22nd, 2010 by pdf23ds

Sometimes, suicide is the answer. I believe suicide is the answer for me. And it very well could be for you.

But not likely. Most people who commit suicide are not thinking terribly rationally. If you’re having really hard times right now, things do get better. (On average.) If you’ve just broken up with someone and are feeling extremely depressed, suicide is almost certainly a bad idea. If you’ve just suffered a large or huge financial loss, it’s very likely that if you just hang in there you’ll be just as happy in a couple years as you were before …

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