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2

?

January 6th, 2010by gtr

the only reason i have not done it is because I dont want to hurt my parents.

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7

method of bliss

January 6th, 2010by wishicould

all in good time
all in good measure
all in pursuit
of the perfect endevor

the perfect endevor
the blade to the skin
the much needed feeling
of how it bites in

how it bites in
better feelings arent missed
its the incontent human’s
method of bliss

i wrote this while i was in a “treatment center” for adolocents. i was there for about a week. even after being “treated” i still feel this way. i write alot of poetry but this is by far my favorite that ive ever written.

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3

suicide is painless.

January 6th, 2010by takemefaraway

everything is FUCKEDUP.

i’ve learned to trust no one.

do i disgust you yet? do i make you sick to your stomach.

if i decided to ler go, would you care? would you acknowledge the fact that i did this and theres no turning back?

you make everything in life so hard.

i dont have to question my sanity simply because i know im not crazy.

just utterly misunderstood.

in your eyes im no one.

not a daughter. a sister. a friend, an enemy.

i’ll fake a smile for a little while longer and maybe once im gone, you’ll see

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3

if i could be anywhere in the world…..

January 6th, 2010by takemefaraway

everyday i look at myslef and tyhe scars i have. i’ve cut so deep and i loved the feeling. i am alone and all i have is myself. my dad died when i was 7, my family turned against me…..its like whats the point to live when theres nothing good to live for? i ask myslef why the hell am i still here. a 16 year old craving an escape from the pain…

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9

long ass story. probably not worth your time.

January 6th, 2010by wishicould

im done bitching about my life for now. i just need to vent. im not looking for pity or “salvation” just a place to let it out. i would appreciate if you didnt leave rude comments. when i was 4, my parents seperated i had no clue what was going on all i knew was that my mommy and daddy were fighting all the time. i knew i was being fought over. i heard my name and my brothers name shouted constantly. my brother and i were dragged around through numerous custody fights and eventually they settled on joint custody. as some of you may …

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5

please let me help you

January 5th, 2010by whydiebeforeyourtime@gmail.com

hey everyone.

i don’t have too much to say but i’ll start off by mentioning that this post isn’t at all for myself.

there are a lot of people who come to this site and write down their experiences/situations for others to read, but many of us here don’t really receive help.

the only way things fall away from goodness is because of a lack of God.   so basically what i’m trying to say is that if you really want to make your life and yourself better, you need Him, and you need Him more than just an hour a week.

if you’d like to talk about Him

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3

Number What?

January 5th, 2010by sbeck1981

My pain feels so unique until I get onto the internet. On nights like this, when I’m home by myself and need any outlet, no matter how pathetic, to the outside world and I turn to the computer, I am amazed and infuriated by how many people suffer as I do. Of course, I operate under the delusion that nobody *quite* suffers in the same way I do, but that is not to say it’s not to the same degree: just a different set of ingredients. I feel my mix is particularly bitter.

I am just your average twenty-something white girl, with complaints that make …

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3

Well…

January 5th, 2010by kaitlynsierra

I just heard my parents talking, and this is the third time I’ve over heard them speaking.

The first time, my mom was telling my dad that he was losing his family.

And all my dad said was whatever.

The second time, they were fighting about the fact that all my dad likes to do is get high, and how having a family “stresses” him out.

And just now, they were talking about how my dad doesn’t want to be here and apparently he has a plan to leave my mom.

I haven’t cut in about, four months, but all of this, is making that not even matter.

I’m so ready …

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4

hey

January 5th, 2010by asdf

GOD i want to express myself so much , but i just cant find the right fucking words …. ive been writting huge paragraphs and deleting them and starting over for bout and hour now … i want to express my feelings and my life thoroully but i cant put it fucking together ….

i read these stories below and those little paragraphs and i can really feel the pain these people have .. when i read what lives they have , and look at mine i feel like its a mistake writing here and that you guys will just think im a moron and that …

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6

a poem

January 5th, 2010by whiteylover

I’ve done the best i possibly can,
To try and make you understand.
But no one seems to really see,
That a certain something, is destroying me.

It’s something that engulfs your life,
Makes you want to pick up a knife.
Its something that takes away your faith,
And makes you feel so unsafe.

I’m not sure how much more i can take,
Before i crumble, and before i break.
I managed to fight it by myself,
With a smile i pretended to be somebody else.
But its at the stage im losing hope,
I’m giving up, i cant seem to cope.

This thing is painfully ruining me,
Controlling my life happily.
Im not living – Im surviving,
And inside im slowly

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6

Ehhhhhhh.

January 5th, 2010by kaitlynsierra

I actually just found this website today, and I figured it seemed like a good idea to try. After reading some of the other posts though I feel a little intimidated, to be honest. I don’t really know what to write, so I guess I should start at the beginning.
When I was in fourth grade, my parents split up. They just weren’t happy anymore I guess. So my dad moved into his mother, my grandmother’s house, and my mom stayed at our house. They didn’t divorce, they were just having a “temporary situation”…I lived with my mom at our house with my older sister, and …

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5

Listen…

January 5th, 2010by takemefaraway

since i was younger, I never felt good enough for anyone. I was always being made fun of and put down. I admit that I’m very sensetive. I couldn’t take it & I tried… I didnt succeed. When suicide just wasn’t working, cutting was my new thing. With every tear shed, a new cut formed. I was alone and empty. Had nobody to save me besides myself..I was destroying me & i didn’t care…Never have & never will I guess..doesn’t change anything..

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7

I need someone to relate.. please.

January 5th, 2010by JordanJennifer

Look. I’m one screwed up almost-adult. In 14 days I will officially be in my twenties. I’ve had a sucky life and I’m not here to complain or rant about how my om did this and my dad did that but I’m writing this because I need someone to understand. Someone to talk to me. I need a friend. I don’t want to die.. well, this second anyway. But  usually do. My only best friend in the world wants to send me away. She doesn’t even understand and she always yells and gets angry. I need someone I can talk to who wants to listen. …

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0

please let God help you

January 4th, 2010by whydiebeforeyourtime@gmail.com

hey everyone.

i don’t have too much to say but i’ll start off by mentioning that this post isn’t at all for myself.

there are a lot of people who come to this site and write down their experiences/situations for others to read, but many of us here don’t really receive help.

the only way things fall away from goodness is because of a lack of God.   so basically what i’m trying to say is that if you really want to make your life and yourself better, you need Him, and you need Him more than just an hour a week.

if you’d like to talk about Him

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0

Stupid Girl

January 4th, 2010by erased_orion

Paradox

You’re both a death sentence

and my oxygen

Just like a tourniquet

when a bone is broken

A deadly medicine,

A toxic antidote

And the lullaby i’ve got memorized

down to the final note.

You picked me up from hell

and left me to die just there.

We both know you can save me,

but you just don’t really care.

You try and piece me slowly

and I break when you hold me,

but I’ll pretend I’m fine

because you alone are my lifeline.

(Inside, you make me want to die.)

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5

Please read this

January 4th, 2010by xSatanx

I was once just like any other person who comes to a site like this longing for death well that all changed and now i know what your thinking at this point o no not another Jesus freak or someone who is going to tell us that we shouldn’t feel this way any more well thats not what im here for so like i was saying it all changed when i had a child with a beautiful girl it was boy and he is the greatest thing that ever happened to me well i just found out a few days ago i have cancer its …

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2

obliterated, annihilated. just imagine.

January 3rd, 2010by somewhatdamaged

my family is so fucked up. i don’t feel like i belong anywhere.
i live alone… i’m so lonely.
everything is so much effort.
i hate the way i look. i hate the way people view me.
i hate feeling so undervalued and unappreciated.
i feel so marginalized and insignificant.
i think about dying almost every day now.
my friend said she would take my cat if i ever died; i asked.
i feel so unloved and unwanted.
i’m my exboyfriend’s backup plan, since he can’t find anything better.
i’m a joke to everyone.
i am so misunderstood and different.
i feel like my friends have abandoned me.. they can’t feel my pain.
i feel so alone.
i talk …

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5

Im lost in myself…

January 3rd, 2010by rampside-girl

I’m surprised I’m still here if I’m honest. Things haven’t exactly worked out very well, though reading some of these posts mine seems almost stupid..

I have some mental disorders, not yet diagnosed and after a year with no help and being disowned by my friends and family, i can no longer cope with it all.

Now, let me explain why they all disowned me, I see and hear things that are not there, I constantly fight with the voices and the drumming in my head, I cannot control what I do or say because someone controls me, I named him John, he hurts me and says nasty things …

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5

die

January 3rd, 2010by hopetodie

im 47 years old and my life sucks i hate my life i want to die soon planing on anding my life soon .the  sooner its over, the better it well be for me im doing before i turn 48

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1

January 3rd, 2010by z

Amazing I have made it this far. I hate where I am living, everyone is such a fucker I don’t care. They can truly go fuck themselves and I would be most happy. Everything I have put into this city, all the love I have tried to instill is lost. This world is full of selfish and inconsiderate people, that is the bottom line. So why should I continue? It would seem if I just faded and disappeared that would make the statement I wish: I don’t want to participate. I am not weak, just a dreamer incapable …

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