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  October 25th, 2009 by etoilenoir

Apathy, depression, rage, insanity, the split of your personality, the controll you know you lost long ago, the hours of sleep lost, opression, introversion. How can something be all of this, possess all of these emotions, without physically being able to be indentified as any of them. The darkness that infects people can never really be diagnosed, cured, or found. If it lives in you, you’re the only one that knows that it’s there. And you’ll know. Every person on this website thinks that they have it garunteed. About 3% of them do most likely. How many people can honestly say, that they’re being driven …

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I feel defective.

  October 25th, 2009 by icculusridiculeus

I’m wholly unremarkable. Not painfully introverted but not an extrovert, either. Not child-frighteningly hideous, but far from gorgeous. I’m not the best at anything, nor the worst at anything. I am, when taken at face value, the epitome of mediocrity. I don’t turn heads. I won’t turn the pages of history. I’m just so completely and utterly…blah.

My moods are unstable, my health is unstable, any relationships I have had were unstable. I’m not strong, fortified…I’m weak.

I am a pretender: Even if I wore the lie right on my face, you couldn’t see through it.

I am a chameleon: I will adapt and blend in with anything …

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1

cant take anymore

  October 24th, 2009 by endlesspain

…and no one cares. it seems everything i do in my life anymore falls apart. if only one person in my life can come and say I care and can i help would make a difference. no on does anymore it seems in short supply. what is going on with people? reminds me of that verse in the bible “and the love of many will grow cold” i think revelation is happening. thing is lately ive realised I dont want to live on the planet anymore…not that I dont want to live I just dont like it here and dont like the people anymore. its …

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2

Somehow, I’m still here

  October 24th, 2009 by paradise_lost

I’m still waiting for something to happen. Not something special that could finally brings me to the end of this pain. Everything is fine, everything makes me feel this is the very end.

I don’t know if I’m the weird one. I want some help but at the same time I isolated myself avoiding others, even my friends, with some silly escuses. Hardly I recognize myself when I look into the mirror.

I started to hate being surrounded by people when found everybody in my life betraying me. Was really my fault? My parents, my friend, my boyfriend. I can’t go out without feelin’ uneasy, sickened. Maybe …

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2

I hate this…

  October 23rd, 2009 by thatgirl7

Parents yelling at you

Boyfriend cheating and doing drugs

Sisters pissed at you

Friends ignoring you for guys

Whats the point of living?

Find something, anything sharp

Slowy drag across your wrist

Than faster and faster

It hurts, but i wont stop

I hope this hurts you to mom,dad,lizzie,lexie,mackenzie,abby,nico

But it doesnt…

I do it again and again  hoping they realize what there doing to me

They dont again and again

 One day i hope to kill myself

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3

i did it again

  October 23rd, 2009 by Mizzexclusive

well i jus got home and made my mom burst into tears within minutes of walking in the door. a disappointment. i am a worn and torn suitcase….i carry lies, drugs, sex, violence, and far worse with in me. no one want to own a worn and torn suitcase…they want the brand new ones. my whole family sees me as a fuck up. my dad doesn’t even tell me anything that will cheer me up anymore. i used to run to him and he always had my back….not anymore. this man doesnt believe in me, my mom  ois in her room crying and i hope …

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4

please let me help

  October 23rd, 2009 by whydiebeforeyourtime@gmail.com

hey everyone.

i don’t have too much to say but i’ll start off by mentioning that this post isn’t at all for myself.

there are a lot of people who come to this site and write down their experiences/situations for others to read, but many of us here don’t really receive help.

the only way things fall away from goodness is because of a lack of God. so basically what i’m trying to say is that if you really want to make your life and yourself better, you need Him, and you need Him more than just an hour a week.

if you’d like to talk about Him or …

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2

Well…

  October 23rd, 2009 by Mildly Fake

There was this Wednesday where I left school early (was a senior at the time).
I came home, nobody was there except for my dog, Jun, who went crazy seeing that I wasn’t paying any attention to her.
I went upstairs, already a wrist-cutter (just not a suicidal one), filled a bathtub of hot water, got in, and slashed my wrists.
blood wasn’t gushing or anything, but it sure was flowing.
I was there, lying in the tub, for about two hours. wide awake, crying, trying to decide whether I should get out or not, and I heard my little sister starting to scream as she read the …

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3

Tell me

  October 23rd, 2009 by CriSpy

tell me whom should i go to for help
tell me who can help me
tell me where do i run to get away from my troubles
tell me where is the refuge
tell me who can i talk to that will understand
tell me when the help will arrive
tell me how to get through this
tell me what will happen next
tell me why this happened to me
tell me what should i do now
tell me why am I alone even when around a hundred people
tell me when will things get better
tell me…

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1

A Little Hope

  October 23rd, 2009 by El Loco

I can empathize with many of the stories that I have read on here. I have battled depression for more than 6 years and I am a suicide survivor. Depression is a serious disease! Depression is not the same thing as getting sad after a bad experience such as losing a loved one or even a job. While the pain from losing a loved one is great you will eventually move on. Thats not the case with depression. This condition takes over every facet of your life. Although negative experiences will intensify it I do not believe that they are the …

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1

because i dont know how anymore

  October 23rd, 2009 by danielledisaster

fuck.

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7

A Million Different Reasons for the Same Old Shit

  October 22nd, 2009 by Leighton

Because I could put on all the makeup in the world and I wouldn’t be beautiful.
Because I gave you everything I had to give.
Because I always forget to see the end.
Because I think this is the end. Of something anyway.
Because I’ll never be good enough.
Because forever is a lie.
Because I’ll never be able to fill this hole.
Because I’m alone.
Because this hurts more than I ever imagined.
Because I’m not really good at anything.
Because I fuck everything up.
Because I’ve lost something I cannot replace. 
Because I didn’t come here to find love or friends. But somehow both happened upon me. And I want

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1

They say I’m strong, but really…I’m just a coward

  October 22nd, 2009 by Kianah

I had never wanted to die so much as I did last week. I don’t want to go into details because I’ve reached a point of apathy to survive. I want to die and to be at peace once and for all, and I know how to make it look like an accident. I’m too much of a coward to commit suicide. I’m too scared of some pain existing that is worse than this.
They say I’m strong enough to endure
I call me a coward for being too damn scared to do anything at all.

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7

what is to live for anyway.

  October 22nd, 2009 by Talyn

ok well i am just going to say what is going on so perhaps someone can tell me what to do because the only thing i can think of to do is stop taking my morphine and dilaudid save them up and then take all of them at once so i dont have to deal with this crap anymore. I am 31 i have lived with AIDS since i was 18, but my life was a living hell before that. i will start at the begining.
When i was younger i knew i was attracted to other guys i did not know what this meant. i …

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1

What is wrong with me?

  October 21st, 2009 by nothingnobody

I was raised in a nice household with a nice family. I’ve always had nice things, things that people say will make them happy. I despise it all. I can’t stand the sight of myself, I hate this all. I don’t know why I can’t be happy. I don’t know why no matter how many medications or therapy sessions I go through, I feel no different. I claim to believe in love, yet I am not so sure why. My girlfriend is the most wonderful thing in my life along with my friends, but love seems to have nothing to do with it. Sure, I …

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2

Who would miss me

  October 21st, 2009 by PerseverentPaul

if i were to take my life, who would miss me?

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1

my suicide???

  October 21st, 2009 by emofreak016

i want to die. i cant do it. not yet. i cant let my brother alone with a dead girl? right?

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1

Selfish is good

  October 21st, 2009 by hume

Fuck altruism and fuck the ontological abstractions of sin. There is no such thing as a moral absolute and any attempt to apply ‘ought’ to anything ends in failure of logic.

We can speak of what IS. ‘Ought,’ however, is entirely subjective. No person has the right to dictate what ‘ought’ to be to another person. Being ‘selfish’ is fine. There’s nothing wrong with it.

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0

please let me help

  October 20th, 2009 by whydiebeforeyourtime@gmail.com

hey everyone.

i don’t have too much to say but i’ll start off by mentioning that this post isn’t at all for myself.

there are a lot of people who come to this site and write down their experiences/situations for others to read, but many of us here don’t really receive help.

the only way things fall away from goodness is because of a lack of God. so basically what i’m trying to say is that if you really want to make your life and yourself better, you need Him, and you need Him more than just an hour a week.

if you’d like to talk about Him or …

Processing your request, Please wait....
3

i hate it

  October 20th, 2009 by calie

i hate it, i hate thinking about killing myself. i feel stupid and selfish. i feel like im going insane. and i hate it because i really dont have a bad life. i just feel selfish because im taking life for granted and i dont want to die. i think about it a lot. i think about death and i always have bad scenerios in my head of how i could die or how i could do it. and the saddest thing about it, is that i do it most when i cant handle things. i do it most when i feel stupid and ashamed …

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