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1

inpending doom

  April 7th, 2009 by hopeless72

Last week my husband came to see me so that we could talk. Well he came back the next day and then stayed the nite on friday nite. He had told me we were sole mates and would be together for the rest of our lives. I had to work on saturday so he went to help his mother with yard work. He sent me a text message staing he would be to my house after i got off work at 6. He then sent another text message about two hours later that asked me if i would be upset if he didnt come over

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3

What do you do when your only worth is paying?

  April 7th, 2009 by pat riot

I’m a white, male, divorced (twice) smoker.

As tax time approaches I can’t help ut wonder if there is any real contribution that the unwashed require of me but to just shut the f* up and pay the f* up.  I think april 15th should be a mass suicide day perpatrated by white males everywhere which would send the world economy into a tailspin of destruction with riots, looting and eventual collapse into the stone age.

Yes, I’m going to do it.  Send my wealth off shore, fire the 28 people that work for me on the 13th and send a .38 through mu oblongota on the 15th.  …

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2

everything went wrong

  April 7th, 2009 by catherine

I am 30 now. I was thinking a lot about suicide since I was a teenager, but i never tried it, all I did was cutting myself.

I always thought this sadness and lonelyness inside me would go away, but it just didn’t.

When i was 21 i was in therapy for a while and I stopped cutting myself after that, moved abroad and started school. But the sadness always stayed with me.

I graduated from school, I am an artist and in school i was really good, but now it’s of course very difficult. That’s probably how it is for everybody, but i don’t have the strength …

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2

Don’t want to keep feeling this way

  April 7th, 2009 by stressygirl

I grew up with a mentally ill mother.  She had dissosociative personallity disorder – it isn’t well known, but you have heard of its first cousin, multiple personality disorder.  As a result, my entire life was a crisis – living in a home where even the slightest mistake in your wording could send your mother into a suicidal tailspin made me learn to turn all my negative feelings on myself (as a child, hating myself was always far easier than being blamed for a dissosociative episode or a suicide attempt – and, yes, she did directly blame me for some).  I’ve been trying, in my …

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1

Falling apart Family

  April 6th, 2009 by Kieylee102

I can’t take it anymore this family is killing me. Well acually I’m killing myself, but that’s not the point. My father is destorying this family and we’re just letting it happen. He was gone for two weeks and we talk to him maybe three times, but his new family called him everyday so he feels that we don’t love him. So he said that he’s going to move in with them and never come home. And he has no idea how much that hurts me. It hurts me a lot because he’s the only parent that I have. And the reason I don’t tell …

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3

The Last Moment

  April 6th, 2009 by Undead_Kangaroo

To pull a trigger.  To jump off the building.  To make that last cut that’s really deep enough to do the damage.

It’s that last moment that’s always so hard to get around.

There are so many opportunities to die.  So many.  And so easy it is!  And yet there’s something that holds most of us back when we get to that edge.

I suppose that’s the reason why lots of us choose pills instead of more direct means…  It’s hard to actually take action to be physically destructive to the self in a final way.  But pills?  They’re easy.  They don’t hurt when you take them.  And …

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4

Lost Love

  April 5th, 2009 by Scarlet

I am a 14 year old boy, and I had fallen in love with a 16 year old girl, and she had fallen in love with me. We dated for months, and I think most would call our relationship unhealthily obsessive. We spent literally most of every day together, and we could barely bear to be away from eachother. We both thought about the other frequently, and we’d claimed that we always wondered if we were thinking about eachother at the same time. I always forgave her for everything and felt horrible when she gave up something for my sake, such as canceling something to …

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17

Gay and Devastated

  April 5th, 2009 by sad_gay

Hey everyone…..I’m 19 years old this year, and I’m a gay boy.

Being gay isn’t easy at all as I’ve always been the black sheep..if you know what I mean…I have always tried my best to fit in with the people around me, and I’ve succeeded in adapting, as I’ve always done my best to ignored myself as a gay and being different from everyone around me.I was in a state of denial.

Everything was going pretty fine for myself socially I suppose..Until I started to go through the pressures of relationships and the like.I’m at a total loss here….my friends are all getting into relationships and what …

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1

what to do now?

  April 4th, 2009 by helper

I am going to move it is unavoidable, and i have to keep it a secret… but i told my boyfriend and he broke up with me. He only did it because of this but the truth is i am not moving for another year… and this really hurt. I am dealing with depression and he didn’t really know the extent of it… and this really crushed me. He is really honest with me and tells me everything still, we are really close and that hasn’t ended but i am still so confused… you see he told me he still loved me and he didn’t want …

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2

New Member

  April 4th, 2009 by Morgan

I am new to this site and not sure how it works. I am hoping to find people who understand and do not judge. I have dealt with depression and anxiety for a few years. My family gets frusterated with me so I choose not to talk about how I am feeling with them. The last few weeks I have been very anxious due to the fact I have been in alot of pain and have to have shoulder surgery in three weeks. That will put me out o work for 4 to 6 weeks, just before my youngests graduation, and all of you that …

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5

chronic case

  April 3rd, 2009 by dreamachine

i’m suicidal all the time. it’s always on my mind. i’ve only made one “serious” attempt that got me in the hospital, but i’m scared of asking people for help and i’ve made dozens of mini-attempts (that no one knows about) or put myself in risky situations countless times. i just wish i could die already. i’m scared of what comes after death (i’m agnostic, i don’t have a particular belief because i don’t know.) but i’m scared of what living will bring me as well..

my story is not particularly abnormal or interesting. rejected by a drug abusing father, raped at 18, kicked out of …

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2

what i really want

  April 2nd, 2009 by sas82

most of the time i think about dying.. but occasionally i do have those moments where i don’t want to die.. i want to live.. that life really is short and i want to have amazing experiences in my life.. i want to be happy.. i want to feel normal.. i dont want my life to end by killing myself.. i want to know what it’s like to feel inspired, motivated.. and not be consumed with suicidal thoughts, depression, and constantly telling myself im not good enough.. im trying to hold on to what i really want.. but i just dont know how im ever …

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4

Am I A Bad Person?

  April 2nd, 2009 by Karla

 I have a house and a family, enough money to live on, a nice school, quite a few friends. Why then am I still not happy? Am I selfish? Or greedy? Or arragont enough to think I am better than other people?

I do not think I am selfish, I may be wrong, or greedy or arragont. I do not think I am better than any one else. On the whole I think I am much worse. I do not deserve the many good things I have, a family and such amazing friends as the ones I have.

Since I was aged 8 and lost my Gran to …

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0

I Wonder…

  April 2nd, 2009 by A New Revolution

Well, i wouldn’t really consider myself suicidal and i don’t know why i really keep having a look at some of the comments people leave on here.

I guess what i’m really hoping for is to make a friend, or at least find someone who i can share the thoughts and feelings of a young, not-proud-to-be-British man with. I have friends in the real world but you can say so much to them…

Anyway, if anyone is interested in talking to me, even for a little while, my email address is – disciple.of.torture@gmail.com

I know i haven’t wrote much about myself but when you’ve done it that many …

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3

Weeks left….

  April 1st, 2009 by z

So, the synergistic forces are closing in on me.  I am not in a panic to end my life; in fact, I am worried that I will be somewhat excited when I do.

I have body dysmorphic disorder; people say my body is fine but I do not believe them.  And then there is my career, which did not pan-out as I would have wanted.  And then there are the bills I cannot pay.

So, yes, I am clinically depressed.  I have a few methods I will try when I finally do try.

I just worry.  That whole “accept Jesus” thing.  It is upsetting to me, ultimatums, you …

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6

Dying is the only thought that makes sense

  April 1st, 2009 by hopeless72

I am 36 years old. My husband and i of almost 12 years separated in January 2009.  I moved with my oldest daughter and her son.  After i was gone for about 2 weeks he moved in with his new girlfriend. When i found this out i went absolutely crazy! He then decided that he and i needed to work on things and try to get back together. He moved to his mothers house with his 13 year old daughter. We were seeing each other as much as we could because we were working different shifts. My bills were rolling in and i had no

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4

I try…..

  April 1st, 2009 by Mari

I try so hard not to be a hypacrit. I’ve been so depressed and i’ve had sucidal thoughts running through my mind like crazy. I go to high schools talking to freshmen and them my story. I’ve gotten letters from some students saying how I saved them. But here I am going against my word. And when I think about that I just feel even worse and get more depressed. It’s not fun not fun at all. I just don’t know what to do with myself anymore.

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8

last day on Earth

  March 31st, 2009 by calista

hey all suicidal angels.. im calista.. well, im suicidal..it’s been awhile..ive tried it so many times but here I am, typing this up. How I wish im dead by now..i just dont wanna live but in some point,i feel i dont wanna commit suicide and pray to God that someone might stab me up or something..It can be anything,i just dont wanna live.

Since I was 5, my life really intense. Parents always want the best out of me, so I gave them all. I do so many things in life, Im always the best student in school and in college, i cook, i bake, i …

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18

No one to blame

  March 31st, 2009 by anyfella

I am this gutless arsehole kind of a person. I knew I would never have the guts to commit suicide. I am forced to study just to migrate to another country. I feel this is so unlike myself. I am finding this as a mental torture. I feel like I ve chosen the wrong course and this is not helping me in anyway. My parents hardly interested in my worries. I just want to drop out from my course but its a lot of money. I just dont know what to do?? Actually I am supposed to be mature enough to handle this issue.

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2

getting closer to suicide

  March 30th, 2009 by homeoffice

I’ve read a couple of posts and I think its great that people have a chance to express themselves and get others to help. I’ve tried to fill myself 4 or 5 times now and I havent been able to do it. I know that most people have issues and that they find it difficult to talk to someone or maybe feel that there is no way out.

I never believed in suicide and I always thought that anyone that tired to kill themselves was selfish and that they didn’t think of the people around them that could help. At the very worst I thought you …

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