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6

what if

June 13th, 2018by seemokay

Imagine living in a world where you can go to the doctors & tell them that you’re depressed & would just want to die because you’ve suffered enough & he have you two options , First option will be take medications for you to feel better or Take the second option which will be giving you A pill tht can definitely kill you.

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0

June 13th, 2018by seemokay

I avoid myself, why ?

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5

It’s all a myth

June 13th, 2018by Anonydeath

Life is all a myth, interaction with any other human muddles the perception of reality. We are slowly killing this planet and this planet is killing us. It has every right to. There is no such thing as happiness, love, loyalty, soulmates, or anything like that. People that have the delusions of these feelings are the lucky ones. Movies, TV, media in general fuel these horrible misconceptions and ruin any chance of healing society. Why should I feel bad for not liking myself or my life? Yeah, I’ve had some shitty experiences that no young person should ever have to go through so what. A …

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5

No One Cares

June 13th, 2018by GerbzBaby

No one cares about me or how I feel. My emotions and feelings are always pushed back in my family and friends minds. My sister hangs out with someone she knows I’m mad at for hurting me. Yet when she was mad at her ex I respected her wishes of not talking to him. If I’m suffering no one asks if I’m ok, if I need anything, no one talks to me. I’m so sick of this treatment. Everyone hates me when I react to my feelings of hurt or just don’t care. I don’t want to go home..

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9

Nothing Left to Give

June 13th, 2018by FailureFather

I’m married and have three kids. I have a moderately well paying job, but I’m hanging by a thread and will be laid off any day.

Even though I bring in fairly good income, because of medical emergencies and flat out stupid financial choices we live in a shitty house. I can’t afford a lot of things for my wife and kids outside of necessities. They are miserable, and it is so hard for me to watch them suffer in this life.

I’ve been trying to find new work, but I come up empty handed. Each failed attempt reinforces that there is no place in this world …

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2

Not Even the half of it

June 13th, 2018by Lorilove1

This is what dealing with my anxiety looked like all through high school. And being bullied didn’t help my situation at all , I use to hide in my closet for hours with my headphones blasting My favorite music on repeat until each attack went away. I would cry myself to sleep wondering why I am the way I am. I wanted to commit suicide plenty of times ,  by cutting my wrist and watching myself bleed out. Thinking no one will miss me so why not , one period of time that really stuck out was  My freshman year of high school …

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3

Trying

June 13th, 2018by falling_soup

I hate that I try to be here. That I keep fighting. I go to therapy and lately or sometimes I don’t even feel like going. I feel empty and deflated. I try to move forward and make progress for others. I somehow convince myself that I am here for some of the few people that need me. I know I am worthless and I am a waste of space and it would be better for everyone if I died. People would worry less, my obligations to certain family members would stop. When I fall, I have no one to help me up. I scraped …

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6

13 reasons why

June 13th, 2018by iamdarling

deleting later

 

i’ve seen a few people talk about this show on here and i wanted to say: 13 reasons why is pure trash. please do not ‘look up’ to it or copy actions/behaviours that are shown in it. it’s a harmful portrayal of bullying, drug abuse, mental health, rape, suicide and more.

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4

I screwed up everything good that came to me

June 13th, 2018by born.loser

Is anyone else is a screw up like me or am I the only one?

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4

why so serious?

June 13th, 2018by SleeplessMind

Often I’m seen as serious. Most don’t understand my humour and view it as morbid, which is no rope off my neck. (Yes that’s humour) but I like to think I’m just a quirky person.

What I am curious to know, SPers, is IF a person tends to change their physical appearance frequently (example- change hair every month, change way of dressing every month) would you personally view that as a validation of instability/hiding oneself or would you view it as a form of self-expression?

What do you think?

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7

******** Hypoxia

June 13th, 2018by kirlin.blair

If you let me fall in love with you like I want to, I’d do anything for you. I mostly want to massage you, eat you out, give you the best food and drink, and remember the smallest things about your personality.

I’d even help you enact a painless and undetectable suicide, if you were completely sure that’s what you wanted. It’s your right and I would never assert otherwise. I would bury your secret and cover it with a nonplussed veneer. I signed up for the whole woman with all her flaws and self-doubt, just so I could find joy in giving. Obviously I’d rather …

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1

My therapist…

June 13th, 2018by namelessqueer

thinks that I’m pessimistic.  She talks as if I choose to be sad when sadness is not an option. I wonder if we are living in the same world but then I realize she is a Cis-gender straight woman.  I don’t know much about her politic or her involvement in community work or in anti-oppression work.  She says my life is good and that she doesn’t understand why I’d want to die.  I feel like I would generally be annoyed but I like her as a therapist and as a person.  she seems open to asking questions and learning.

I’m at work right now, wondering how …

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1

;(

June 13th, 2018by Nobear

Just want to die please…please let me die i don’t care anymore I’m worthless and only suck up life just end it

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5

June 12th, 2018by rivets

I will win. I will hold out until then. Maybe two weeks? Three? If three, it’ll be an ordeal. Hey, let’s all stare into the abyss a while.

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2

Hope unfound

June 12th, 2018by ladydeath

Realizing what a piece of trash human being I am and have been for the past two years. I don’t know how I became this way even though that’s kind of a lie and I sort of do. I lost everything and everyone I love. Took five muscle relaxers to sleep for as long as I could. Wishing I could die wishing for suicide but sadly that isn’t an option for me because of my beliefs. Wishing I could turn back time. Wishing I could just escape this unbearable pain. I have no inch of strength left to fight. I did everything I could to …

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5

Figured it out

June 12th, 2018by Failure143

Today, I realized I was nothing but a money bag to my Mom. Today I realized I was just a creature to yell at for my Dad. For years, these were my suspicions, and today I found out the truth. So now, I can’t see happiness, I can’t see kindness, all I see is a gray void where there was once a masterpiece. So now, I hide my sadness, my pain, my fear behind either a fake smile, or a fake scowl. Just a great life, huh? If my younger self could see me now, he would be mortified at what I’ve become. Cutting, crying …

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7

Small Positive Thing

June 12th, 2018by Urm8451n

I decided to win no matter what obstacle is thrown or being put on my way.

 

I have recurrent pancreatitis, and it is hell of pains.   I have financial problems.  I have no father.  I have no family.  I lack the support that others have, but I still go toward my target.

It is easy to be positive when you have it all.  The really challenge is to be positive when you are down.  When the bank calls, and you have been hospilitiezed,  you are facing that specific challenge.

 

Im here for the same reasons as you guys, but I want to help this community by helping …

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7

Death thoughts

June 12th, 2018by Costi236

Death.I think about death everyday. The eternal dreamless sleep. How would it feel? To know that after the bullet will cross my brain I’ll be gone forever.It scares me sometimes.But I still want to end it , all I need is a gun.I don’t believe in afterlife.We have only one life to live and make the best of it. But mine is ruined.I work as a security guard because doing nothing is the thing I do best.It scares me , death..thinking about me in a coffin with my parents near it but this is it.I can’t take anymore.I will save money and buy a gun …

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1

I don’t know

June 12th, 2018by NoSense

I’m just not sure if I’m still happy or happy to begin with. I just don’t see anything worth enjoying. I just don’t feel anything. I just want everything to end. I was thinking on ending it myself but I thought of all the hassle and pain it would bring me. Even looking at painless ways to end my life is just not worth my time at all because almost all of the meds and pills out there should have a doctors prescription and stuff like that. It sucks. I’m just stuck here in an endless loop everyday hoping that I don’t wake up tomorrow.

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7

Multitudes

June 12th, 2018by thehusk

I have so many conflicting desires, impulses, feelings, and perceptions. I can feel that something is the most wonderful and important thing in the world, and a few hours later it will seem terrible and utterly worthless. My motivations and emotions fluctuate so much from day to day. My perspective on reality swings back and forth at a terrifying rate. I don’t know how to live with it.

How do you act in a coherent way when you know that in a few hours your thinking will shift, and you will want to undo any progress that you’ve made? That your beliefs about what is important …

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