I think i know whats wrong with me now. Its not that im suicidal. I just dont care about myself or anyone else anymore. I used to be the most talkative person to the point my mother told i talk too much as much as she does. But one thing I can say I’ve learned about people and myself is that for some it takes a lot to change them or for some like the joker says in the dark night it only takes a little push. I myself was to take a lot however letting my current girlfriend deep into my heart was a […]
Tag:
2002 albums
It seems like forever since I’ve been on this website, and I pity myself for needing to come back, for needing to vent about something that never leaves, the follows me as close as my own shadow.
This feeling, this dreaded feeling is back, and as I try, day by day, to push it to the back of my mind, all it does is grow, feeding off my happiness.
I’m upset, so upset that it seems that all is going well, yet this feeling won’t allow me to feel joy, to feel anything besides remorse. I want to be the one who is always smiling, […]
Today I went to my same old school followed the same routine with the same people who wouldn’t care if I never showed up again. I listen and talked while I was ignored again and no one even noticed when i didn’t show up to lunch. I don’t belong where I am and I feel so alone. Nothing matters to me anymore, not sports, not running, not being social, I used to love to go out but now i just want to stay in bed all day and shut my brain off. The only reason Im still fighting is for my little sister […]
I need someone who wouldn’t judge me on my past..
someone who can understand why I am broken..
who understands why I binge drink so much
who gets why I cannot trust that well
just someone who can hold my hand and say everything will be okay…
why is that so hard to find?
Hi…
I’ve decided to end it all on Friday,as you saw from the title…Been struggling with severe depression and bipolar disorder for 2 years now…Nobody cares now and nobody will care when I’m gone either,so I figured out that I will be happier in the afterlife(if there is one) more than I am now…I don’t want to hear any of that ”it will get better” crap from anyone,since it will not.I also have a serious vision illness that will at some point let me completely blind.Right now I see kind of good,but my vision will at some point just stop,and there is no cure or surgery […]