Why??!! Why??!! Why does everybody always say that I’m happy, and I’m funny and laughing and stuff?! Do they really don’t see that HUGE mask I wear most of the time??? It’s just so crazy. Today too, I was at the part-time therapy (monday till friday from 9am till 3pm) and the group and the therapists thought that I was happy and that everything was okay, and so on. And that while they know I wear often a mask and that it goes really bad with me right now. But how hard I tried, they wouldn’t believe me I’m feeling really bad and that all […]
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9am
I’ve been a heroin addict for about 3 years, I’ve OD’d twice and lost my job, partner, family and non-using friends in the process. I’m a gay man, which I guess doubles my risk of AIDS. I’m 29, and I can’t start over now. My life is done, death is in the fucking post. I’m so sick of people staring at my needle tracks like I’m some fucking lepper. My boyfriend of 7 years kicked me out, and I don’t blame him. Before heroin, I was a serious alcoholic. Like 3 litres of vodka a day. I’d be drinking at 9am, and it wouldn’t be […]
i’m just tired. i literally came today to a point where i wanted to seriously die. i kept trying to hold my tears back. and i was frusstrated.
i haven’t cut myself in 4 years but today i cut my arm to remember that feeling. the feeling that calms me down.
i spend my teenage years babysitting
monday/tuesday: Â Â Â 9am-10pm
wednesday: Â Â 9am-5pm
friday: Â Â 2pm-10pm
saturday/sunday: Â Â Â 9am-5pm.
babysitting a baby with down syndrome, a 2 year old and a 9 year old isn’t easy. Â sometimes even other kids.
i never have time for myself.. not even for a simple hang out with a friend. my mom always has […]