as I sit here deep in thought. Am i something you forgot? I am lonely, I am cold. These feelings surrounding me are getting old. I wonder every day, if your love is here to stay. only God knows why so I sit here and I pray. hoping one day this pain will go away I feel torn I feel used I feel broken and abused my heart can’t take this anymore broken shattered on the floor. I am here you are there why can’t you just finally care you say you love me say its true but this love fires turning blue. broken […]
Tag:
Biggest Mistake
I have 3 brothers, sister and mother. My dad suffers from dementia… My sister is my only sibling, whos been acting like a real one. Mother said that my birth was the biggest mistake ever in her life and she’d be so happy if I had offed myself. She blames my narcotic painkiller addiction which I developed after I was hit by a speeding car and by a miracle survived. It hurts. It really hurts, I always wanted to love my brothers and especially my mother. I’ve found my salvation in helping random people whenever I can. I guess their gratitude compensates somehow for the […]
Hi. I may seem like the average teenage girl, but I’m not. I may seem like the popular girl with a perfect life, but here’s what I really feel like. I’m a horrible person. In 9th grade, I had a best friend named Carly. She was funny, talented, and pretty. Then I started spacing myself from her and I hung out with the popular crew. Biggest. Mistake. Ever. They started bullying Carly. I didn’t do anything- I just stood there and watched it happen. They would harass Carly on websites such as Facebook, twitter, etc. Then, on December 19, she got sick of it
I’ve been walking alone. I turned back around and everyone was far away, so I continued walking. “I wasn’t afraid of being alone anymore.“ I’d whisper that to myself. But inside me was emptiness. I forgot how it was like to feel alive. Now I just live in the memories as I walk these paths. But suddenly I was lost. I didn’t know what direction to take. I was scared. Everywhere I turned there was darkness, no light shined. So I sat there in dark hours in the middle of nowhere figuring out what I’m going to do. I was blinded by the tears I […]
This might seem like a pointless text, but I do need help with something… You see, there’s this girl, and she really fucking awesome, and I would like to try take it further than friendship, but I have doubt, we’re almost completely the opposite, I’m shy, quite and prefer to be by myself and I have attachment issues, while she is confident, loud, and loves to be around people XD but I don’t know if its really worth it… The last time I was close to somebody like this and they said they would be there, ended leaving, and left me with many scars, physical […]
I finally started talking to my counselor because I need help. Biggest mistake ever. She told me if I was going to commit suicide she had to tell my parents. She lied. I told her I think about it a lot. Now I sleep on my parents floor like a dog. Everyone talks to me like I’m about to die. I really messed up. I don’t think anyone would ever understand how much I care for my family. They are all I have even if that’s not much they made mistakes but I don’t like to stress them out or make them cry. I wish […]
I always thought I was a strong, kind and confident girl who everyone relayed on and came to for help. I was a good friend. But whenever I did something kind, I never got anything in return. Society ruined me. I wanted to put my life on track again but it didn’t seem to work out. People made me nervous. They said words they never thought that I’d over think off at night.
I cry a lot and it’s pretty weird how I fake smile everyday and I pass through the day then, I remember everything at night.
I used to tell people they are strong and life goes […]
I live a life, yet I feel like I do not truly hold an important existence. All I am is an immense disappointment, a big burden, & faith put to waste. I have felt worthless and invisible in society ever since I was a little child, and I have worked so hard to overcome that, yet I have just landed right back into that same dilemma and loneliness. In so many ways, I am still that lonely, confused, and lost child I was then, yet unlike then, there just is no hope for me now. Change just is not possible.
One of the biggest issues in my […]
yeah nothing has gotten better ever since i finally listened to what she told me and left her a lone. i got accused for a lot of things, a harraser, a stalker, just a complete jerk for something that my heart was telling me to do. which at that point i feel like i can never trust my heart again.. i tried going out there and finding someone to replace her i really did but no one is like her and no one will ever be like her… im depressed and i miss her so much but its always in my head that she never […]
    (the following is a letter I recently wrote in serious consideration with my personal thoughts. Sorry its not Hollywood style beautiful, but it is how I am feeling at the moment)
My dearest family, friends and anyone else that this letter may find its way too… This, in the end, may b worth nothing more then a bad joke because there r no words I can say to express how sorry I am… Sorry that I was blind to the blessings I already had and was selfish enough to think my problems were all that mattered. Sorry that I […]
I’m a 22 year old engaged mother of one. My family takes care of my son and I entirely. I own a home, a car, I have food in the fridge and the lights are on.
I have failed at everything I’ve ever tried. I only graduated HS because my dad put me in a lock down boarding school where I didnt have a choice other than to graduate. I recently got kicked out of a school I’d been working 3 years to get into due to my anxiety/having to take medication for said anxiety.
I cant keep my house clean, I cant keep my kid happy, […]