I know its a lie. why do i live it? at every moment of serenity i feel like now i have seen it and now i am gonna maintain it. but only end up in this same wretched state. I am full of confusion. I don’t believe in anything anymore. why? because i am aware of its opposite too…i am aware that opposite also exists and with same conviction. and since both exists, i believe in none. This life as i am living now, i never considered it my true state, my true nature. I always feel like i am living it “just out of […]
Tag:
Conviction
Hi, I just wanted to say that ever since my soul mates suicide I have found life meaningless and refuse to get close to anyone else. I spend as much time alone as possible and wish I never woke up everyday. I’m usually ok once I get going but the mornings are torture. I truly feel that all I do is work hard and then go out partying and get wasted to kill the pain. Its hard to accept when you know you long for death but just on’t quite have the conviction to do it yet. I don’t want to put my family through […]
Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.
Nature has fixed no limits on our hopes.
Hope for the best but prepare for the worst.
Hope is nothing but wishful waiting.
Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out.
Hope is the little voice you hear whisper “maybe” when it seems the entire world is shouting “never!”
Hope is the upside of despair.
Hope is not the last to die but the dream is.
The miserable have no other medicine but only hope.
Beware how you take away hope from […]
I was making a presentation today for a job interview and I came to the conclusion that I don’t really care about it. It doesn’t matter if I have the best job in the world, or if im smarter than anyone else. If im alone then I am the loser in the end.
So I am going to organize my life around the correct priorities. So no more games. they just numb the pain of being alone. This site is kind of doing the same. I spend a lot of time here and I guess its probably not the best thing for me. I should be going places and doing things. Which is very […]
I never liked life for what it appears to be: a process of disilllusionnement
I was trusting and full of hope as a kid, but this was because I used to idealize life and people’s intentions
life experiences later, I’ve become rather suspicious and apathetic
I don’t think we’re here to find our purpose or happiness .. I feel like we’re here to chase after things, only to realize those things were just illusions .. the more you believed the illusion to be real, the more brutal the wake-up will be, the harder it is to swallow the pill of letting go
I was led to believe in certain […]
Random Reminiscing , cos’ I let mom read the instructions..
(just like the bubble gum components being molded by our mouth, exchanging places to nowhere )
My clothes, school books, mags, and other toys for big men were designated to be inherited by my close relatives. I really thought she would be happy when she realizes my breathing identity is about to disappear from this lively planet, instead she scolded me, saying I had to help my brothers raise their family. So I wondered again, Am I really just the one selfish? or does it just runs in the family? Nah, we were programmed both from our […]
Screams
Screams no one can hear
In the darkness there is silence and fear
The shouts uttered by a madman
Heard throughout the ward
He is the forgotten one
The one whose lost all hope
There’s nothing anyone can do
To help him cope with his pain
He talks to himself
His brain and body taking sides
Of his split personality:
One to live. One to die.Â
The voices in his head
Tell him he should be dead
And half his will wishes to oblige
Yet the memories of his friends
Keep him moving to mend his life
And live another day.Â
He’s got nothing left
Nothing left to hide