Written to a dear friend, who helped me live the sweetest lie. I’ve often contemplated suicide and have attempted and, as you canÂ obviouslyÂ tell, failed to actually kill myself. My dearest friend, Matthew, who’s name has been changed due to privacy issues, and I dated for a year. This is my last letter to him, sent to him only a few days before his death. He was found in his garage with the engine running not long after his death, and soon I hope to join him.
I’m tired of this life, tell me a lie.
Do me a favor; tell me I’ll be missed if I die.
Let me leave thinkingÂ that I was loved.
Tell me that people actually cared.
I know it’s a lie, but I don’t care.
Truth in this world is very rare.
Tell me that everything will be alright.
Tell me that I no longer have to fight.
Tell me I no longer have to cry.
That soon I will be ableÂ to fly.
Let me live in my fantasyÂ world, if only for a day.
Let me bask in the sunlight and carelessly play.
Let me dance the night away in the rain.
Before I die, just please let me forget my pain.
-Ren, The Riddle Queen