I have a reason to stay alive. I know nobody cares but for so long I barely lived with any reason but now I found him. He brings me pure happiness. For the first time I have a smile that is really mine. Behind closed eyelids no longer am I haunted with nightmares and worry but peace and knowing when I wake up he will be there right beside me. When I feel his warmth the coldness in my heart melts away and I am left feeling such strong love that it keeps my thoughts so far away and I can actually live. I am […]
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Eyelids
Worried faces stare at me,
I try and hide the agony,
Buried within, so deep inside ,
So deep that I no longer cry.
nothing helps to cure the pain,
blood from my wrists like crimson rain,
so sad and helpless what to do,
When you have no one to turn to.
Close my eyes, get some sleep,
Silent tears no longer weep,
feel like nobody has to know
An eternal slumber i will go,
Eyelids heavy drift away,
To a hopeful bright and newer place,
How lost I was, when I found out,
The outcome of my chosen route,
my minds racing, so constantly,
i hardly have time to breathe,
Who knew the choice to just give up,
Would lead to a neverending depression.
In my dreams, I always dreamt I cut myself so deep that I’d lay there dying in an ocean of my own blood. For so many nights, I dreamed IÂ bled more than normal, I dreamt I lay there as the life blood flows from my body. It always has the same end. Everyone I loved runs in my room in blinding fury. They look at me with deadly smiles and wicked eyes. Charging towards my barely conscience body, they reach into my skin and rip out my veins. And I scream…I scream so loud over their animalistic laughter. I’m drowning in my own blood, but […]