I hate having a scientific mind, it’s like I can’t have a normal life because I’m thinking of things along the lines of “I feel like we are made of nothing, the whole concept of how we live life and how we sleep is unexplainably weird. We have eyes, mouths and ears.. We are walking limps.” It all sounds funny but it gives me this really nasty hopeless feeling. Trapped in my mind kinda thing. I wish I could think what normal people think but I’ve bypassed that mentality long ago. I’m living for my family and boyfriend in whom I love dearly. […]
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Family Love
I never keep promises unless I reeeeeeeally have to
The only reason I keep any promises is when either the law or the medical establishment forces me to keep them…
I’m a survivor and haven’t yet killed myself, nor have I gone with counting down five years from now to die at my own hands, because I was made to swear that I wouldn’t attempt suicide again, nor ask to be helped to die again, by who? The fucking doctors. I love them, yet they give me a hard burden to bear. I love one friend in this world, a few family members only.
I never believed in […]
I’ve been depressed for about 6 years. Â I’ve been thinking pretty much these thoughts throughout the entirety of that time period- the thoughts becoming more complex and clear or unclear as time passed. Â I’m 18 now. Â It has been especially bad this year getting ready for college. Â The thoughts of moving out and beginning the rest of my life are eating away at me. Â I never really thought I would get this far but I did. Â The fact that I’ve only been here 18 years is killing me. Â I’ve only been here 18 years. Â How can I possibly put up with 70 more years […]
My greatest fear when thinking about taking my own life is the family I have with me and that care for me. I’m so lucky to have both my parents together still, and that would do anything for me. I also have a sister, brother in law, and two nieces whom all of I adore. I’m 24 years old and I feel like I’ve never experienced a normal life. I’m gay,and I also have other problems that make me self conscious of my appearance so I hate being in public or any places with many people, so I cant go to gay bars or any […]
90% of my thoughts are suicide.
I can never be happy, I’m convinced. I cry literally every day and I’m just really sick of it. I used to be normal, I really did. Then, I started high school.
In the beginning of my freshman year, I made some new friends. About three months into the year, for whatever reason, these “friends” decided that they didn’t like me very much anymore. I was severely bullied by them for the next two years, which caused me to start self-harming.
As soon as this started, I met a boy on the internet. He seemed nice enough, whatever. Over the next three […]
Im 24 years old, married, a mother of two, and i have been suicidal since the age of 12. I attempted many times, been hospitalized, been on any med you can think of, and i still cant pull myself out of this. Truth is, i love my husband, but our relationship was abusive in the past, i developed PTSD. Also coupled with molestation as a child, i have alot of anxiety. I have also discovered that i have been in love with a long time friend for a long time. I sleep with him on occasion, and i just want to stay there. Like i […]
You know those times you feel like nobody is listening or you’re all alone and you just wanna give up?! I do.
I feel like that all the time and i can’t help thinking as if suicide is the only way out. I’m NOT that typical girl whose life is soooo sad and everything is dark.I have people called family that love me and care for me BUT, don’t get me.Everybody thinks I’m okay and that everything will be fine. But no they’re wrong they see the happy silly little girl that i used to be until Middle School happened. Until i found out the truth […]
I have problems, I think…
It’s always been here..
I have a man who loves me.. and I have a few friends … and family…
I love this man, and as of right now he’s my rock.. Cause I don’t want to be alive..
I have this feeling of needing to end my self.. A feeling that things would be better
for everyone else in my life if I was gone… They say other wise, but I have it
imbedded into my head.. I just .. I need help.
Is there a right moment to really give up on life? Is there really another way to figure out if
death is the right […]
I have major depressive disorder and social anxiety/borderline avoidant personality disorder.
I was going to go to group therapy. I never did.
I was seeing a counselor. I stopped going.
I take an anti-depressant. It helps a lot but not enough I guess. Less anxiety and less pain but that isnt enough.
I live a solitary life. I am like a hermit. I barely speak to people. I avoid women. Don’t make eye contact, speak as little as possible. If they seem to like me, become vaguely hostile…put up those old barriers. Whatever it takes. Because it hurts and they can hurt me more. But all I really want […]
HeHe What Fun! Today my brother saw me jump of a 50 story rooftop what he did not see was me pulling my parachute! And I am sorry for the post he made, he thought I was dead. Only  he thought I was dead, I told my family! Oh hehe, I do love pulling pranks. It is the last thing i Can love in this world. Though my death date is still March 14th :(. And today is the worst, i was going to ask my now dead girlfriend to marry me! I thought it would be so romantic to ask her to marry me […]