hey. today is friday the 13th. but, it doesn’t make much of a difference, since all days of life for me hold a significant amount of bad luck and misfortune.
I’ve been depressed almost all my life, and suicidal on and off ever since I was a child. These past few months have been nothing but hell, I’ve tried everything to fix things and be happy, but this time, I just can’t force myself to be. On Friday I plan on using charcoal to kill myself. I hope it works, the last thing I want is to wake up again. I’ve tried multiple other methods within these months, but every time I either can’t do it or I just wake up hours later. This time, I’m determined to finally make the pain stop. Nothing is going to chance, and nothing will get better. Fingers crossed that I finally succeed this time.