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Fucking Time

Allow me to vent and don’t mind me

by BurstingBilrost
written by BurstingBilrost

Fuck it.

Fuck myself, fuck everything.

I’m in a perpetual emotional tilt. Dazed and confused. Head spinning.

Legs shaking. Feel like smashing stuff.

I would be a calm guy, I would. I am that guy. But have no choice anymore. I’m losing it.

There’s no choice. It all bullshit. Its in me and from the past. Its fatum.

Hey, I believed in peace and justice and all that. But seriously, if I had power, before abolishing this type of financial system, etc, I would FUCKING WHIP everybody first!

Just fucking burn, Just fucking burn.

All nonsense. I have nothing, nothing. Worthy men have died younger than me, so what the fuck? Why do I fucking […]

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Depression is burying me

by Narya
written by Narya

I’m in my early 20s now and I’ve survived a tough teenage, including several suicidal attemps. I’ve always been an “alternative” girl, listening to non commercial music, not wearing fashionable cloths, not going to the disco, not smoking/bingedrinking/fucking with everyone around. This fact made my life more complicated and allowed a lot of people to talk shit about me and bully me. I’ve tried several times to convince myself that my being unique should be a reason good enough to live, but it didn’t last too long. My family is a normal one, but my parents don’t support me, don’t like what I do and […]

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by raskolcp
written by raskolcp

For ten years I’ve messed around with my brain. I was never happy and I’m still not. I’ve lost almost everything that matters.

Last night I woke up screaming. I was asleep, had JUST fallen asleep, and in my ‘dreams’ I was talking on the phone when I had a seizure. It felt so real. I fell forward, unable to reach the phone just staring at it. Finally I screamed. And that woke me up. This happens all the fucking time.

I laid there and I realized, the dreams really aren’t that bad. Even that terror that I feel at the last minute before the screaming wakes me, at […]

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My Life Summed Up In 412 Words!!!

by Insufficient
written by Insufficient

I have fought severe depression and schizophrenia for a number of years. I go through bad times and then I can suffer through hell for months to a year or so at a time. As I write this I am in a downer period, voices constantly abuse me and tell me to kill myself and hallucinations frighten the absolute shit out of me to the point where I am screaming for help and crying my eyes out. I have had a number of suicide attempts but have been interrupted because of being on constant suicide watch. I did however have 2 very close attempts, on […]

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Does is ever get better?

by dont_mind_me
written by dont_mind_me

Let’s see. 4 years. 4 years ago was the first time I took a blade to my own wrist. And now here I am, barely a teenager and I want to die for the millionth time. Whenever something bad happens I automatically think; “let’s save that for later, you can rid the tainted blood with one trip to your special drawer”. But sometimes, sometimes it isn’t enough. Sometimes I just have a thousand thoughts running through my head, all of the bad things that have happened and keep happening. Hey, your antidepressants make you cold all the fucking time. Your dad is never here and […]

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empathy

by dissappear
written by dissappear

every fucking time my dad tries to empathise with me, when i tell him i am having a hard time at school, he tells me “walk away and stop starting shit.” i cannot believe the people that are biologically programmed to love me. do they even care? its not like i tell them shit about my life, i just say it like it is. and wen i ask them, have you ever been bullied, were you ever the bully? they reply with no so how the fuck do they expect to understand when they haven’t gone through shit. i hate my fucking disfunctional life. as […]

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Fucked up…

by jasiel_bvb
written by jasiel_bvb

Hey, so I guess the title says it all. I am fucked up. And I’m only 11. I started noticing that I was anorexic when I was 8, I didn’t like eating. I never knew why, and I’m still suffering anorexia… this month has been one of the worst. First of I lost and amount of weight (im underweight), so then I can’t see my only true love, and he hasn’t texted nor call for about a week now. I don’t only suffer anorexia, but cutting, suicidal, and they say I have mental health problems as well. My cutting started in 4th grade, when my […]

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It’s not okay.

by _PrincessSin
written by _PrincessSin

I’m 18, and some days I do not know why I am alive. I have considered death when I’ve been at my weakest. I’ve wanted to go to the beach drunk & walk out into the water as far as I could go and just let go of everything. Let the waves take me away. I’ve wanted to overdose on my Zoloft. And when I really can’t handle anything I take a lighter to my left arm and burn myself. my arm is scarred up now. I HAD a boyfriend from April to this Sunday. We’ve been on and off for the last three months. […]

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Just a need to share

by Lavanderblue
written by Lavanderblue

I hope nobody i know ever see it, and i hope that feeling will vanish soon.

But, it’s hard. Living unhealthy, unhappy, and lonely.Waking up, knowing the difficulties waiting ahead, the lack of stimulation, ….the limitations that my health imposes me.

Spending too much time at the hospital, in need to be fixed. Can i return that broken body of mine? I wish.

When i feel out of breath, when i can’t take it, i think of going, leaving, you know? Dying.

It’s not as i wanna take my life. It’s a feeling of…expecting, hoping, not to wake up .Wishful thinking.

Will my heart give up now? Tomorrow? Tic tac, […]

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