I haven’t come here for a long time, but this evening is just too much for me. More than anything, I need someone to take care of me tonight. I’m in so much of pain (physical) that I can barely stand or walk. I’m hungry, but I don’t have it in me to actually do something about it. I’ve been feeling so lonely recently, and this physical pain is making the emotional pain worse. I would love to have someone take care of me for a change, rather than me being the one that helps everyone else. But tonight, I am reminded just how alone […]
Tag:
Good Person
all of my “friends†couldn’t care about me and recently i’m realizing that. i lost one of my “closest†friends last thursday because he called me a self-centered b**** and claimed he’d been there for me through everything and i hadn’t given a f*** about him once and never did for anybody. for once, i actually stood up for myself and told him that he was wrong and that sparked things. now we’re not talking.
i miss days from school a lot too and not once has anyone asked in the past few months where i’d been or if i was alright. they don’t even care. […]
life is pretty awful right now.. I am honestly hopefully it eventually picks up, but it straight up sucks right now.. I’m not a good person and life is falling a part.. Considering the pointlessness of human existance in general, whats the point?
I’m 24 but i feel like i’m 16. Â This sumer has been the longest one ever I feel like I’m hiding from all my friends so that i don’t have to answer the question what are you doing right now? Whats next? Hows school?
What am I doing right now?! I”m trying not to fall off the edge every day feels the same and I’m wondering why am I still here why didn’t I die? Â I see news reports every day about innocent people being killed and i wonder why are they gone but i’m still here? Â Why couldn’t it work? Â Why am I so useless […]
I tried several times before and maybe it’s time to finish the job. I’ll never be the good person they deserve to have in their lives. I wanted desperately to be the kind of person to make their lives better, not this pathetic waste of space with the foolish notion that I can actually turn things around.
I just want someone to stroke my head and tell me everything will be ok, but do I really deserve that?
Hi people, been like this for as long as i can remember, most of my problems are from me being lazy, i mean apparently a doctor says i’ve got depression too but truthfully i just think its my own stupid fault. I’m a big, lazy fat, 20 year old who spends his days indoors doing nothing, I see you great, amazing people and i wonder am i allowed to complain, you people are having to live through the real problems and i don’t feel like i should be allowed to complain. I’ve wanted to kill my self for such a long time now, though I’m […]
I ruinedmy life with bad choices, poor academic decisions, bad financial decisions, and dishonesty. When I met my husband and gave birth to our beautiful sweet babies I was so sad. Sad because all at once I knew I would never be worthy of this gift I was given because of my past mistakes.
I have devoted 10 years of counseling to my bullshit, with multiple explanations that the attention seeking and erratic behavior from age 18-23 was linked to feeling worthless at home, feeling powerless, bla bla. I don’t blame anyone but myself. The best way I can explain it is that I was crazy […]
I feel like the reason I like the suicide project is because I can write my true feelings. Â Usually I keep them bottled up. Â I know my dad has advanced diabetes and my mom just lost her mom and then her little sister and she feels helpless so I cant really tell them “hey I have serious depression, I lay in the fetal position and cry and wish for it to be over” Â That doesnt help them. Â So I try to keep going and then what happens my sister starts a fight with me over shit that has nothing to do with me. Â So I […]
I have moments when I’m sobbing on the ground, unable to think of anything besides suicide. There is something so comforting about being able to take away your own life, your own existence. I’ll lay there and cry because no one should hate themself the way I do, no one should be comforted by the thought of death. I am though, we are. That’s something no one knows about me, I’d probably be one of the last people anyone would pin the label suicidal to, I’m always smiling, laughing, and helping others. There is a reason why I haven’t followed through with my plans though, […]
I made some mistakes, no not some i made a lot of mistakes. And i think i deserved everything that i’ve been trough and i’m going through. I wasn’t a good person, i used to do bad things, things that are irreversible. 2 years ago i finally noticed that i changed my name, who i am, went a new place, place that nobody knew nothing about me. i made some mistakes there too. i always make mistakes. and i am so ashamed like i can’t even explain it. if i could go back, to anytime i would go that time fix my mistakes. my past will […]
i wish i can drink alcohols and get drunk, forget everything for a while.. but i cant really drink it.. i always puke.. wish i can sleep all day and hav beautiful dreams instead thinking of how miserable my life is.. i hate my parents i hate my brother i hate my environment i hate my life i hate everything.. my parents sucks.. they always see things different than wad i see,, and their financial sucks too make it worse.. i always see tht im less than my brother.. its not like im comparing myself to him.. but the fact tht he went to expensive […]
I have been lurking on this sight for a while. I thought I would post my story. Until about 15 years ago, I had a good life. I had friends, normal ups and downs. I was able to cope with what life handed to me.  I got married and had a very difficult time having a child. It worked out in the end, but husband was abusive, etc. I was lonely. I tried to connect wi other Moms. ±Gradually over time, I ended up with just aquantences  or “group” friends (people invite me to events and parties, but not one on one. It was very […]
I’m that guy that has been shit on more than anybody knows. Early days as a kid I was harassed daily and tormented by fellow classmates because of my mothers crack addiction. The only reason they knew was because their parents did drugs along with my mother. Was born with a bad foot which pretty much opted me out of any sports or doing well as I could. Shyness throughout the years was difficult to deal with as I learned to talk to females and learn what they wanted and what they saw. My father has been in prison all my life and haven’t read […]
I used to be the most popular (I hate that word) girl in my school. & in the whole district. For all good reasons though. Like I am a fun person to be around & I’m just a good person. I have two groups of friends.. Well I had two groups of friends. The one group is all bitches & their cheerleaders & the other one is all basketball players.. Even tho I don’t play I still fit in. But in the cheerleader group I was friends with the one girl who was really annoying & one time we went to camp together & we […]
I’m don’t understand how sometimes she’s so responsive and other times she blows me off completely for days on days… Why can’t she just treat me at least decently most of the time? I hate feeling so dismissed and uncared for.
For all the times i’ve been there for her, I think I deserve her to be there for me.But she’s never there. Even when I reach out she doesn’t even care enough to give me the same kind of dedication.
I know she cares, I know deep down she’s a good person and a good friend. i just wish she could learn to value our […]
I’m saving myself the time of writing my entire story. It’s a long one. The change in my life the loss only just happening 1 year ago this month. I’ve posted my story here once before, it was about half way through. While things have continually gotten much worse since I haven’t been this concerned with how things are going to play out. I’m at the end of having any real choice on how I leave. I’m about ready to just drink as much antifreeze as possible. I’m scared honestly to live and scared to feel any more pain. The antifreeze while painful I wouldn’t […]
I have an important assignment for school, that I NEED to do today, it’s already like a week late, and it basically determines if I graduate from high school. But I can’t work on it. My mind is reeling, it’s not ordered, it’s not focused, its all over the place. I NEED to do this assignment but I can’t. I just keep thinking about all my fuckups. I keep remembering the last time I was happy, and I want to go back there. I want to but I can’t it’s in the past and I can’t get it back. I’ve been so unhappy for so […]
Well I’m 21 years old and seriously considering taking my life. I have no friends, have never had a relationship or even a chance to prove my worth to a girl. I stand alone day and night living this hell I call my life. I’m so depressed, frustrated and the feeling of hopelessness that washes over me is the worst. I feel as if this is it for me, this is going to be my life until they put me in the ground. The older I grow the more the loneliness and fear of being alone grows and it’s becoming a harsh realization that I […]
I just want to die. I have plenty of friends, great job, beautiful house. But I’m just tired. Tired of pretending my life is great. My husband is a selfish ass. And of course the only thing that matters is how he sees me. Even though I know he is a selfish ass. I want him to give me some credit. Not put me down for every thing I do, think or say. Of course I’ve tried to talk to him about this ( only for 18 years). but women are the ever ” I can fix it” – with enough love understanding and communication […]
Sometimes I just do things and don’t realize how fucked up those things are until it’s too late. It’s like something just takes over my mind or body. I have sex with boys that I don’t really like then I get mad at them for calling. I am not a good person. Or I don’t know how to be one. I don’t really know. I always say that I’m not just one of those bitchy girls who plays mind games and fucks around. But I am, that’s exactly what I do. In fact, I’m probably a lot worse than all those girls because the entire […]
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