im in a position where i need that pain deep in me to end. and i dont know how..the only way that im aware of is to end everything. im in a a position where many girls have been. it may even sound common and uninteresting to many. i have lost the love of my life..the love that every minute of my life in the last 3 years have revolved. it may sound common but the pain of every person is huge..its unbearable..and its important to them. my world came crashing down. after all these years, i seem insignificant and worthless to the love of […]
Suicide can be a relief
But when life gets better and you know it’ll get worse again, then better, then worse,
What do you do when you’re in a good period
And you know that somewhere down the track you’ll have a bad patch,
Which you know will be hard to tolerate let alone get through?
It’s like sometimes I want to die over knowing that today is fine but tomorrow may not be…
Yet if I were to die today, tomorrow might be fine!
So I don’t die, hoping for the best,
Knowing that I could be hoping in vane,
Or I could be hoping with success.
I never know until life happens because […]
I have a lot of admiration for many of you who can actually go through the act of attempting suicide.Â I have wanted to since I was 7 years old and have not had the courage.Â I am now 53 and still a woos.Â I suppose what it boils down to is that I really don’t want to kill myself but to be put out of my misery.Â Don’t get me wrong.Â I have come very close a time or two and someday I may just get that courage to succeed.Â I have lived with myself for many years and all I know is that […]
I just dont feel like being anywhere. It seems as though i dont share the same values as those who inhabit this patch of earth alongside me. I feel like im in a constant state of purgatory, neither here nor there. The only reason im on this site is i can express myself to those who might possibly relate, although im not so sure about that either. Im a blessed individual with a loving family and a lot of opportunities laid before me. Im mentally and physically blessed and i feel selfish for cursing my existence but i havent met anyone who gets me. Everyone […]
here are to the good times
I’ve had in my life.
those fragile little moments
where I know i’ll survive.
here is to the haters
here is to the world.
who thought that they could beat me down
but i won’t lay upon the ground.
I’ll throw some punches.
I’ll get you back.
hell, i’ll hit.
I’ll give you a slap.
Cause no more!
I won’t take your crap.
Here is to the losers,
the outcasts, who cry.
here is to the mourners
who still know how to smile.
Here is to my people,
the ones who know how to think,
at least were […]
I don’t know what to do with my life anymore. There are no more times I could laugh for real. Everything’s just fake. It sucks. I once had friends who I trusted in my old school, but then I transferred to a new school and realized they weren’t the friends they said they were. Now, In my new school, I do have friends. Friends that are only for the good times. I don’t know who to trust anymore. Sure there are times when I tell other people my problems but those problems are the problems that even I know I could bear with. But what […]
Hello, just ranting on about my life.
I am committing suicide soon. I have wanted to commit suicide for a long time (10+ years), but I am at the point now where I know I can kill myself.
The reason I know is that I have been doing things that I would have never done before over the past two or so years. I have forced myself out of my comfort zone, had a ton of experiences I would have never had otherwise, and learnt a lot. One of the things I have learnt is the ability to just DO IT (pls don’t sue).
I said fuck it. […]
I stumbled on this site looking for stories like mine i was devasted to find ppl contemplating suicide. i lost my fiance to suicide 8 mnths ago we were together 9yrs and soulmates I’m now 25yrs old and left to raise our 6yr old daughter alone i watch her cry for her dad every night as do i. i canot express or explain the pain i feel it is unbearable and to watch your daughters pain wile dealing with your own is enough to make u insaine. loosing a loved one to suicide is da worst way possible you are left with feelings of not […]
Hey I’m new to this but there are some things I need to get off my chest. I’m sorry if I offend anyone or just generally upset/piss people off.
So I’ll start from the beginning.
From a very young age I didn’t really have a “normal” family. My parents divorced when I was a few months old so for a couple of years it was just me, my mum and my brother. My dad was always in my life, more so now than he used to be, but still he was around. When I was about two we moved in with my stepdad. He has two sons […]
Nothing is comfy to me, everything burns me. Thinking about past friends makes my heart break and thinking of all that could have been, makes me burn inside. I have the problem with no solution. The withdrawls are making the seconds which usually feel like minutes feel like hours. Waiting for nothing constantly. Still cant accept that I have to kill myself even though I know it. Maybe the doctor was right, the symptoms of feeling sick everyday are somatic, either way I feel it so real or not, its real. I feel fadingly disconnected from my own mind, I feel like I need to […]
(might be triggering)
i’d say it began in 6th grade; they made me weak by pointing out my flaws. i had thought,Â why would anybody want me if i look like this? i began giving away my food because i didn’t want to be fat, i never smiled because i didn’t like my teeth, i didn’t talk much because i didn’t like what i often said. they persuaded me to hate myself.
so when he would pay attention to me, in 7th grade, i felt happy. too happy. he was the first to see my scars. he told me he cared. but he only wanted one thing..
it wasn’t […]
Please give me your best advice
I am a 33 year old mother of two, I was with the father of my son & daughter for 12 .1/2 years. I was 16 when we started our relationship. He was 10 years older then me and how I found out was though finding his driving licence as he told me when we first met that he was 21:- (26)was the truth Â even then he still tried to say it was a fake. I should of realised then what he was all about but being only 16 young and being my first love I was blind!! I […]
This is what could, as you would say “break the camel’s back”. I may have lost someone I considered a brother, but I could lose the only closest person after him… My sister (not related).
My sister and I have been close friends for close to about six years. We have spent so much time together and told each other many secrets. Even though I still act somewhat paranoid around her, I know she still cares for me and we love each other very much. It was only recently did we start talking again since there was a break in our education that allowed up free […]
I really donâ€™t understand.Â Nothing affects me like my father.Â Iâ€™ve had my brother tell me he is so disappointed in me, that I am selfish and immature, that I abuse the ones I love with what I do, that all I care about is attention-seeking, that Iâ€™m going to fail in life.Â Iâ€™ve had my mother tell me that she simply canâ€™t believe that I am not doing this to hurt her.Â That my cutting, that my suicide attempts, that even my physical illnesses like my catatonic episodes where I ended up in Hopkins Neurology because I couldnâ€™t move my body, that all of […]
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
If you find this, damn your lucky. You probably don’t even know this site exists, and now I’m writing on it.
When I said I wasn’t bothered about not being with him anymore, I lied. I cried myself to sleep every night and continue to do so until this day even thou its so far on. I’m forced to see his face everyday, he’s befriended my enemy, and when I say I don’t like that girl, I mean she wrecked everything, she found out my darkest secrets, twisted them to make them ten times worse and exposed them to everyone. Now I see them everyday, […]
Im going out,
With your notes in hand.
They get to me so much,
It is something i dont understand.
I kept all the letters,
The ones that you wrote.
I miss so much,
Getting a note.
I read them once more,
Before i grab my knife.
I remember our good times,
When i didnt think of ending my life.
But now that is over,
And I am done.
Im not going to live like this,
So I grab my gun.
Tear run down my face,
I let out my pain.
Put a blade to my wrist,
Slice threw a vein.
Thats how they find […]
pain… everything hurts, every single memory, each word, all my love gone forever and my life going to waste.
Don’t wanna breathe anymore, don’t want to think anymore, don’t wanna spend the rest of my life missing the good times, don’t wanna have a life without my family and friends, Don’t wanna have this life, some days life feels just like a sickness and death seems to be the only cure…Fucking life worth less than nothing.Â
How do you change your thought process? I’m not talking about just negativity, here. The way you think. I’ve been so analytical in my thought process that the only way to change is to constantly brainwash myself towards another way of thinking, and that’s what I need to escape from. I want to live in a more direct “Living by the moment for the moment”, not “Living in my brain about the moment in the moment”. I can’t just “live”. I don’t need a happily ever after either. Just normal conversations with a person. My father. My friend. Anyone. (Yeah, I’m a […]
I hate the fact that I have things that hold me back from committing suicide. It’s just like the guilt and the people I meet and know and the future I might have that holds me back from doing it. I hate how I have these good times where everything goes smoothly and it seems like it’s going to be okay and then it turns to shit. I just hate it. I hate how one bad thing affects my whole day. How one person can call me an asshole and not to have an attitude when I react to somebody snapping at me and then […]