The days when you just feel like giving up. I was determined to be happy today; my all time favorite person (my grandad) is coming for a visit soon and I was excited. But I dont think the universe is ready for me to be happy yet… No, shit HAS to go down and depress me again.
My best friend in the word, my only friend really, has decided to ruin my day. See, we’re in a group to do some little skit in French class… She cant do it. She is incapable of memorizing her 4 lines and refuses to try a simpler part. Its a group mark, and she will drag my grade down if she presents the way shes practicing.
See, shes rather stubborn, its pretty much her way or the highway, and she cant solve her.own.problems. She HAS to drag someone else into the argument, which never helps. I find it irritating, honestly. I find that she never has to work to get her way, she just gets it. Dont want to go to school? Dont. Her parents will let her. Dont want to wake up (after being pulled out of bed, mind)? Crawl back in bed and sleep until noonnoon. Shes spoiled, and she has the nerve to say that shes depressed, anxious and soooooo tired? I cant ever sleep until at least 10:30, 11, sometimes I dont sleep till 2 AM and I dont sleep in on purpose, no! I get up at 6:30 AM and I go to school on timetime. You dont know tired, Miss Melatonin every night! Ugh!
She has no idea what being depressed is. She has one or two fights a month with her parents, and a few catty remarks from one girl. I have to deal with rumors, glares, whispers, daily confrontations, and daily fights with everyone in my house to the point where I dont feel welcome on this planet anymore! I cry myself to sleep sometimes, Ive cut myself, Ive written my notes, Ive set dates, Ive made plans! She doesnt know what I go through every day. No one knows.
PS sorry for my rant, I have to get it off my chest somehow. Sorry for bothering anyone who actualy reads it