I wake up with the notion that maybe you still love me. I know it’s not true. It’s been weeks, no, months, actually, I don’t even remember, it’s felt like a lifetime. Everyday without you in my life is an eternity spent in the company of misery. You were the bow to my strings, the stars to my night sky. Without you, I’m nothing. Without anything, what reason is there to stay? I remember your scars, the pattern of your iris, the smell of your hair. I remember holding you under the bright lights, crying, promising nothing could ever drive us apart. I remember the […]
I just turned 18 about a month ago… But for a long time I’ve suffered from suicidal thoughts.. I’ve attempted it before, but failed and ended up in a hospital to be watched.. They released me in two days… I tried to come back from it, and nearly succeeded… But now, I just don’t want to continue this battle anymore…
When I was younger… I was left in a foster home… I got physically abused, and verbally. I was sexually harassed, and yet… I struggled on… I thought of running away so often I nearly did it… But I was afraid… Then someone “saved” me… Turns […]
I don’t know what brought me to this website. First I was googling resources on suicide prevention and it brought up a link, and here I am. To start things off, I’m not the kind of girl that would be found on here, according to my friends I’m a social butterfly, friendly, sweet and kind hearted. Why I may be those things, I’m also a lot for things no one could even imagine. My family would be completely devastated if they knew the thought of suicide was even slipping into my mind. Of course, people always say “you should see a councillor and get some […]
“And ever has it been known that love knows not its own depths until the hour of separation.”-Khalil Gibran
Today has been a heart-wrenching day. I woke up knowing it was the 2 month mark of when my little brother took his life. It has been a devastating loss that has shattered my world. He is a part of my soul and always has been and I feel tremendous loss.
And then I received an email this morning from a dear friend known here as Iamzero, stating that he was sorry but that he could not go on any longer and wished me thanks and love. Love […]
He was taken away from me. In my last post I talked about a man that contacted me and saved my life. He is gone. Taken away from me when I need him the most. I don’t know what really happen all I know is that he is gone. I don’t even know what to do. I’ve been straight for awhile and now all i can do is stare at my blade. I’m trying so hard to keep going, but I don’t know if i can anymore. He’d want me to keep going. He’d want me to try right? I call his phone all the […]
My best friend tried to commit suicide in January 2012.
Again in May 2012.
Again in September 2012 because of a fight we had.
Her family threatened to sue me if I ever talked to her again.
Me and her made up at the beginning of this summer.
Even when we were still on the outs, I was there to help if she needed it. Â I don’t know if she knew that.
I’m just so tired of suicide.
She has me. Â I’m completely devoted to her and keeping her safe and alive. Â She’s like my sister, and she has me on her side. Â She just doesn’t care.
My heart is broken from watching […]
Just actually sit down to think about it
Love is a myth and you can live with out it
Love and pain go hand and hand
If you cant see it why believe you can
You want to see you want to believe
In your heart its not make believe
Use your mind your heart’s deceived
By the one called your hearts thieve
In the end why feel the pain
From the myth love let your mind restrain
To let your heart be broken and stained
Is a huge risk and in the end what do you gain
When you think your in love
Fall […]
Hi, my name is Shannon and I am “to far out to find my way back” as I like to say. I have excepted the fact that I may never get better but I never expected to get this bad. Depression is like a roller coaster with up and downs that change so fast that outside life becomes a blur. In short I’m so lost in my own world that I may never find my way out. This scares me more than anything else because my world is like a horror film, full of death and destruction. The one thing that scares me the most […]
This is my story about how i had my heart broken a couple of times. it soon spawned a fear of abandonment in me and made me think i was never good enough. if you wish to hear how i survived my hardship then please read this.
I was born different from other kids. i chose not to give in to the social flow and i  lived how i felt. i had friends, a pretty good amount. i fell in love many times and had a few relationships. I grew up being who i felt was me. Sometime around the summer of 2012 about early June, […]
my heart is a trinket, with a broken St. Christopher and a used subway ticket
I don’t know why I feel this way. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m tired of feeling down and depressed all the time, and constantly feeling unloved. I have a story just like everybody else, but what’s the point of telling it? Everybody has their own problems, why should I complain about mine? I just wish I stayed dead…I’ll still never understand why I came back. I just don’t know what to do anymore…but death sounds better and better every day. I’m just broken beyond repair.
me and my gf broke up about 3 days ago it wasnt just a normal relationship (9months ago i lost my mother to cancer) and this girl was the only thing that  could stop the void and heartache and i dont know i honestly feel lost…
I dont even know where to start my first and only love of 14 years, dropped a bombshell 4 weeks ago that he had been cheatin on me for six months and was leaving me and the two kids. I feel betrayed, lonely, hurt and empty. He was my best friend and we were planning our lives together and he just left and i dont understand why I wasnt enough and how he could just stop loving me after all these years. I know i sound weak and moany and should just pull myself togetrher because people are goin through worse but i just cant. I […]
I hate him.
I hate his stupid smile.
I hate his fucking dimples.
I hate his muscly arms, his toned torso and his thighs and calves,
I hate the way my tummy flips when i think about his voice,
I hate his fucking voice, how soothing it is, how it makes me want to dance every time i hear it
I hate how much he makes me laugh and smile, how he understood my humour when no one else did
I hate how comfortable yet on edge i felt around him, like flying in the air but being spun around at the same time
I […]
I used to be a very happy person. In fact, I was that loud and annoying kid who was always laughing and didn’t care what others thought. I do well in school; I dont really try very hard and I get all A’s. I have friends; they all think I’m the happiest guy alive. At school, I still act happy even now; I don’t want them to know. I have a girlfriend; a beautiful, sexy, funny, silly girlfriend, and I loved and still love her very very much. But on October 1st, 2011, she sent nudies to one of her guy friends. When I found […]
Dear who I lost,
I miss those talks we had, about the future. How one day you were going to get down on one knee and make me yours forever. How you’d come home and find me running round in the kitchen trying to impress you with some fancy cooking. How when I called you to the table, your feet wouldn’t be the only ones tapping towards me, but other, but smaller ones. I believed that one day it would happen, and I looked forward to them, I looked forward to spending my life with you.
You were perfect, I’m not just saying that to you, if […]
Well, this is my first post on here, so might as well tell you why I’m here.
I had the perfect life, weren’t many people in it but those I had were the best. I depended mostly on my best friend and boyfriend. I was doing great with studying. I didn’t speak to my parents much but when I did they were friendly and supportive.
I had been with my boyfriend for 9 months, but it felt like forever, which isn’t a bad thing. We rarely argued and when we did we were quick to forgive each other. We often talked about the future and I convinced […]
i dont what to do anymore… when i was a kid i always got beaten by my parents sumtimes for nothing… i always saw my father beat my mother and out of anger my mother beating herself…. my mother once told me she never wanted me and my father says no point of having a daughter cuz i don’t have interest in cooking or cleaning …. my parents got divorced after living with each other for more that 10 years… after their divorce none of my friends wud ever talk to me till today been 10 yrs nw and i dont have a single friend….. […]
He was my reason for living. I had nothing else to live for. Two years. Everything was going to be okay because I had him and he loved me and we were going to have a future together. Three affairs, in two years. Countless other hookups. I have nothing else to live for. Maybe my death will hurt him like he hurt me. It will hurt them all. They’ll finally feel the pain they caused me. The pain I live in everyday.
I’m not going to leave a note. I’m not going to afford them that final explanation, that last kindness.
I’m going to buy it online, […]
So this is probably going to sound dumb but I’m extremely depressed over my recent break up I don’t want to go into details because I feel it won’t help. After my break up things began to get worse, I found out my grandma is very sick and is getting worse each month and there’s nothing I can do for her at all, can’t even see her. I haven’t been able to make enough money to stay in school and financial aid keeps denying me, my friends just don’t seem to understand my struggles in my life and kind of seemed annoyed that I keep bringing certain things up. I also feel like […]
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