Tag:

Hoplessness

Help Me Be Better

by The Worst of Us 4/25/2017

written by The Worst of Us

I’ve recently decided to commit suicide. Im comfortable with this decision and Im excited to take the journey into the great unknown. I’ve recently made a shitfest of my life and there’s no fixing it at this point. The pain Ive caused and the pain Ive felt are just unfixable.

To preface all of this, I used to be a heroin addict. Ive been clean for 3 years but I still get withdrawals from time to time.

Two years ago I met a girl. She was great. We clicked right off the bat. Started going out and she got pregnant within a month. She left the […]

4/25/2017 2 comments

Destined For A Life-long Misery

by fuckedup4life 4/3/2015

written by fuckedup4life

I don’t remember being happy, ever. Since I was 11 years old I’ve been thinking of running away from my so-called home. When I turned 12 I had my first suicidal thought. Since I turned 15 I’ve been attempting suicide every two years. I am 22 now and I just attempted suicide yesterday, but failed as usual.

It doesn’t change, it never will. My life has been nothing but a series of unfortunate events. I hate myself, I hate my life, but I don’t hate life. I wanna live a life, but not mine. I wish that one day I open my eyes and look in the mirror […]

4/3/2015 8 comments

want to be free of hoplessness

by Anotherdude 8/28/2013

written by Anotherdude

I am 43, just quit a job I was in which I did because I’m supposed to want to live, to be grateful for being alive but I do not and am not.

I’m not grateful, I see no merit in being grateful. Moreover, to whom is this gratitude supposed to go.Â Did someone create me and now I owe them? Really?

Sounds like b.s.

The idea that I should live my life out of gratitude to a benevolent being seems really odd.

I trudge through this existence, yearning for it to end but I cannot end it…quickly that is…I have the notion of taking a walk…a long walk…that […]

8/28/2013 3 comments

What is it?

by TarotXIII 3/19/2013

written by TarotXIII

What is life? What is death?

Such words countlessly repeated.

What is after? What was before?

A bird in a cage has no use for such answers.

Brocken wings, muted songs,

For life will exhaust them before long.

What is this wonderful world you speak of?

I look, I search,

I desperatly yearn for a revelation.

But I see grey, I see ugliness,

I see the bars in hoplessness.

When all smiles could faked and all cheers could be fabricated,

Even love will be twisted.

What is remaining? What should I be searching?

Only the self satifaction of daydreaming.

Let me sleep, let me dream, let me wander away from my cage.

I don’t want this heart anymore

3/19/2013 3 comments

Soulless

by ___ 2/19/2013

written by ___

I’ve been visiting this site for the past few days, and have been wondering why. Why am I here? Why am I reading other peoples’ stories? Do I want to post my story? Do I get some sort of kink out of the misery of others? Do I enjoy other peoples’ pain? Do I hope that I might be able to sympathize or empathize with them? Why? The reason I post this now is because I think I now know.

Is there anyone out there like me?

I’ve been wanting to die for six years now and have attempted suicide seventeen times, but that’s not want I […]

2/19/2013 3 comments