im in a position where i need that pain deep in me to end. and i dont know how..the only way that im aware of is to end everything. im in a a position where many girls have been. it may even sound common and uninteresting to many. i have lost the love of my life..the love that every minute of my life in the last 3 years have revolved. it may sound common but the pain of every person is huge..its unbearable..and its important to them. my world came crashing down. after all these years, i seem insignificant and worthless to the love of […]
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Immediate Family
Im not gonna try to post something extremely witty and dark and intellectual and poetic.. i just cant sleep again and im hoping that posting this will clear my mind and i could get some advice from people who possibly feel the same way as me. I could list every terrible thing thats ever happened to me and all the times ive tried to kill myself and all the addictions ive had but thatd take too long and im tired and lazy. So basically, im depressed, im bipolar, im insecure, im lonely, and i feel like nobody cares about me apart from my immediate family. […]
Over the years I have known several people that have successfully ended their lives.  None of them have been true friends but just people in my life that I have known.  The most recent is a man , for the most part well respected in the community, very generous with his time, great with kids, a professional and a very active member of the church.  I was one of the few that knew he was dealing with manic depression.  (Isn’t it odd that we can pick them out immediately, almost like they had  a scarlet letter around their neck but only visible to us, […]
i don’t know why i am posting this.
i know my problems may seem trivial when compared to others. i know that there very may well be someone out there who would appreciate me more than she ever did. i know i bring most of this on myself. i know i made mistakes, and hurt her.
but i also know that i can’t do this. i know that i was truly happy, and i know that she was also truly happy. i know that my life is forever incomplete without her. i would be alive sure, but i wouldn’t be living. i feel so alone. i feel […]
I’ve been married now for almost 5 years. I live in a state without my immediate family. I have tried to make friends, but it always seems like I end up with the selffish ones. I Never thought moving to a new state would make it so hard to find a place where I can fit in. I try to make friends so I can have someone to hangout with or talk to when I need a friend. It is so hard to use my out of state family, because I don’t want them to worry about me if something is hurting me.
Lately, I […]
Hello all,
I joined this site because I wanted to find an anonymous way of writing down what I felt over the last few years without causing anyone I know (especially myself) any more issues. The last thing I need is my mother committing me, she already thinks I’m in some real trouble psychologically.
I have more to be happy about now as opposed to when I was 25, but it seems as though things are worse than ever. I have a real job, and Iagave some hobbies I’m active in. I worked hard to accomplish that. But I’m consistently crushingly lonely. I can’t […]
I dont know where to start.  I’ve been trying to deal with my depression for a long time now and no matter what i just cant be happy.  There are a lot of things that have happened to me and my family in the last few years that contribute to my depression.  Suicide is always something that crosses my mind everyday.  And i don’t know if i want to do it or not.
I guess i could start talking about my family and how they contribute to my demise. Â First off theres my brother (i wont use his real name so he will be ‘mike’ for this” mike […]
Done. Nothing to live for. Not going to bother being alive anymore. I realize I have no other person in my life who cares about me. I had another awful day today, and I just realized that not a single person cares to comfort me. I ran through the list in my head. My mom is self-absorbed, and suffers from crippling emotional problems, so she is never someone I confide in because she does understand how to properly deal with other peoples’ emotions. My immediate family are rich businessmen and women, who believe that pain is for the weak. My few close friends all use […]
My last day online will be 05/31/2012. My last actual day … not soon enough. And if anyone tries to pull that stuff that someone did with Biscuit on here, it is not going to work with me so do not waste your time.
A few more weeks and I’ll be out of here. One of my methods is already procured and the two backups are on their way. Terminated my employment a week ago so it is daily inundation in books, games, movies and music until the end. Since the job is done and the methods are going to be present, no turning back now.
Everything […]
Hi, let me start by saying that I am NOT suicidal. However, I have tried to commit suicide when I was younger a few times, but, I never actually tried to where it’d actually put so much as a scratch on me. I also often want to die… But honestly, I just don’t have the balls to do anything… And I also thought about if, I fail, and wake up in a hospital, get better, have to go to therapy, people ask me questions, all that shit would piss me off.
Anyway, what I came here for is to have a place to rant and just […]