the adrenaline upon contact
the instant relief as the first drop of blood emerges
the pain
drowned out my the stinging of your skin
the memories
merely but a tiny thing now
the sobs slow down
breathing heavies
let`s go deeper
maybe i can kill myself
each time you go deeper than you imagine yourself to handle
each time you numb the skin a little
each time it becomes easier to go deep
until one day you find your limit
you find the end
your escape.
Tag:
Instant Relief
The pain doesn’t get better. Each day, my suffering seems to increase. I feel like a ghost walking through my life, I don’t know if anyone sees me or not, I feel invisible. I avoid talking to people for fear of frightening them with the truth… if they listen to me, or look into my eyes, they might see what I try to conceal; anguish and loneliness at the threshold of becoming more than any human being could possibly bear.
Last night, I cried for hours, and fell asleep imagining the instant relief of being hit head-on by a fast-moving train.