I think what I need to do is just get away from my family for a while. We are truly messed up and dysfunctional. It’s like my adoptive parents go out of their way to get kids with disorders and mental problems. Maybe they really are kind hearted people and try to help kids like that…. but what do I know? All I can say for sure is that on our house alone we have a kleptomaniac with anxiety, an addict with depression and a shitload of other shit, a girl who has a sailors mouth(who I personally think is a sociopath…seriously), and two other normal […]
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Ish
So I’m 14, I know too young to be feeling this way. But I have no confidence I cant stand looking in the mirror I hate myself. I’ve been breaking down a lot, nothing but crying this isn’t the first time but its never been this bad. I literally have been having suicidal thoughts everyday, its gotten to the point to where I almost started crying in school today. I barely started cutting again. I had stopped in like November-ish of last year I think. But its been awhile and I started up again like in April I think. I’ve written so many suicide letters its ridiculous. […]
-Living in a house filled with false emotion
-Day by day the pain growing stronger
-Finally one day comes abruption
-Walking in the cold night every second feeling longer
-Death is nothing more than just a tranquil thought
-Everything going black,colder,careless
-I could have been that kid that random kid that was shot
-Sight fading,mind bending,moving seems weightless
-As I think my finally moments are coming
-A bright light shines on my face
-To think I was knocked out till it started shining
.This is a poem-ish,about one of my memories,basically what happened was that I was living in a house with what I thought was a loving mother, one day overheard “I knew I should […]
Lyrics to song I pretty much jus stayed up all night writing..
Oh and uh.. *All Rights Reserved*? haha.
* Rapped
When was the last time you breathed?
I mean honestly, fully, whole heartedly took a breath?
When was the last time you took a stand?
I mean verbally, viciously, fought for something you believed?
When was the last time you fell in love?
Fell so hard, you found yourself unwilling to even get up?
When was the last time you truly cared?
Thought about somebody else, not the person in the mirror
Self-centered, self-ish, but sophisicated
We pride ourselves in all the wars and the domination
But what’s the point in killing other beings created
Like ourselves? We’re just […]
I want to die. I keep hurting people, and I try my hardest not to. I try to show everyone how much I love them and how much I care, but I suck at showing emotions.
My ex cries every time she thinks about me because I hurt her so bad. We had so many problems. I tried to be perfect. I tried to be the amazing person she deserved, but all I did was fuck up and hurt her time after time.
My ex and I don’t talk anymore, but now I have a new-ish friend, and her and I […]
I tried to be happy[ish] and stop putting myself  down so much, but it didn’t really work out. I was relatively happy for about 3 months, but I don’t think I was happy at all. I forced myself to not think anything bad, and I would always push a ‘bad’ thought out of my mind as soon as it appeared. It was mentally tiring, I guess. So I gave up. If I am to be happy, I want it to be real and not me just being in denial. So now I’m back to being depressed. Although I have to say I am a lot […]
Fairly sure that I’ll kill myself tomorrow. Why not today? Why not now? Don’t know. Just want to do it on a Saturday.
It’s been ten years (-ish) and nothing has even dented my depression. Not talk therapy, not drugs, not exercise, not eating better…nothing.
Stick a fork in me, cause I’m done.
Hey everyone, I’ve been a long time lurker, this is my first post. I don’t really know where else to go to get advice or support or anything like that.
Basically I’ve had depression for 3 years now (I’m 18, turning 19 in a few months), and I’ve just been suffering through it, I’ve been thinking about suicide every day but I’m too much of a coward to just do it. In all honesty, if I had a gun or something, I’d do it, but I’m just scared of the pain.
Anyways yeah so I’ve been talking about it with one of my friends and this girl […]
I don’t have a sob story. I have never been abused. My parents are alive and healthy as are my siblings.
I’m almost sure I have depression, I have every single one of the signs, but I don’t want to tell my mom.
I’m not pretty, I have an oddly shaped face and horrible eyebrows that no matter how much I pay to have them shaped, their just never pretty. My eyes are nothing special, same as my nose, and my lips are incredibly thin. My hair is a ugly blond-ish brown that just looks greasy all the time. I’m not smart, I’m not athletic, I’m not […]
So after I made that post, I had trouble actually falling asleep, so I watched an episode or two of Futurama. It`s a pretty good show, I would recommend it. Anyway after I finally eventually got to sleep, I had a pretty fucked up dream. Though people dream every night, I (they) rarely remember my (their) dreams. I guess this was one that stuck out.
The first thing I remember was going into this smaller type of sort of `home` restaurant (I guess..) and asking for a job. This woman (Maybe..) in her 50`s ish told me that there was already a dishwasher and didn`t need […]
ok. last post was a little vague i guess.
i was sexually abused when i was 6 till i was about 7/8 ish, by some boys in my primary school. (i’m a girl). I am absoulutly terified of people touching me now, anywhere. i csnt really get close to peoplr, obviously i have trust issues. when i get upset, depressed – i cant talk to anyone, my friend gets really anoyed and angry. she says i act like a spoilt brat, and i make her think we’re not really best friends. i told her about what happened to me. doesnt really look like she took it […]