I don’t know. I battle this little thing in my head that tells me to stop eating. “Stop eating! Your thighs are getting bigger, your appearance is getting uglier. Stop!” But I don’t listen. I eat away. No, I don’t throw it up, I don’t take laxatives. Nothing. I’m afraid that someday, that voice will win. I want to to stop. I’m craving the taste of hunger pains. It’s an urge inside of me. Why am I like this? I know I will accomplish not eating. I know it. But when?
Tag:
Laxatives
So, I couldn’t access this website for like a week so I started a blog  theventingspace.blog.com . Self harm is a pretty common thing for people with Borderline Personality Disorder. I started cutting in February of 2012, I was self harming in different ways before that but nothing that was visible. I took laxatives, I had unhealthy relationships, I drank too much, and going wayyyy back to my early childhood( the only other time it was visible) I pulled out all my eyelashes and eyebrows and blamed it on an episode of Punky Brewster.  Now why would someone start cutting so late in life? I […]
For 3 years now I have really liked this guy. (gonna call him Bob) I got his number at a party and started texting him. We wrote notes to eachother, went to movies, and the last few months he would come over so we could hang out. He considers us to be best friends, and tells me how crazy he is over this girl he works with. I want him to be happy, even if that means im not in the picture. But listening to him talk about other girls kills me and im too scared to tell him… Â I broke up with my first […]