I’m so positive, always smiling, laughing, telling people what they want to hear, trying to make them happy but sometimes when I’m alone, I just can’t control myself. I fight myself, knowing I will loose. I just, I don’t know, I don’t know how to explain. People out there, having fun, couples, or friend groups, going out everyday, their parents let them go out. But they are always wanting for more, i don’t understand. Is it fair? I love living and life but sometimes it’s seems so dark I can’t even find the light switch. Â Ofcourse I feel so blessed for all of these, so […]
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Light Switch
Ok I read here a lot and have posted here when I have been feeling way off he planet, which is increasing often now. I feel “ok” right now. But there are some things I want to know.
1st this is how it is:
Not always but in the mornings when I wake up can feel like a light switch in my brain has been switched off.    Feels/sounds like dousing a match in water like. Like waking up and then just deflating (Always Followed by nonfunctional bad days)
Generally allways being “aware” that im sad / horrible / hurting all the time. Not fitting in.( I would […]