I just want to share a story, my story, for anyone that might care to read it. Â It will probably be the only thing I post on this website. Â You’ll never know who I am and I will never know who you are, but perhaps we’ll meet someday, get drunk together, and you’ll tell your story and mention a story you read on this stupid website and I’ll say “hey, that was me! Â I wrote that!”. Â And we’ll laugh about it and go build a bonfire in the woods and howl at the moon, or something. Â That’s the kinda thing I like to do, anyway, […]
Tag:
Loaded Gun
I have hundred’s of reasons to die, and almost none to live (zero that matter).
Where do I find the courage? Get drunk, drop some pills? I do have a loaded gun in mouth, so that part is OK.
I officially wanna die. I mean it. I hate my life and I hate living. I wish I could get that loaded gun from my ex somehow.. I wish I could get my razors back from my other ex. I wish I could die. My life sucks. I posted my suicide story on youtube for those who want to see its (My Story- Suicide Morgan Davis)… I don’t even know if it’ll show up.. But if it does then watch if you feel like it.. I was almost in tears last night… And I can’t even cry I’ve cried so much. I’m ready to face […]
I’m alone. Sad, tired of trying, of living. Tired of waking  up to a bright happy world, and seeing nothing except grey, and things only I can see, hearing sounds of joy, but only hearing the voices of my despair. Franks gone now. Replaced, forgotten. Austins here. He’s just as bad. Eyes are staring, watching with a pointed loaded gun,  or a knife waiting for the right time. I am forgotten, none cares for the sake of me, waiting for the right time. 17. The magic number. 15, countdown. They say if I die, I’ll be back in my world, back in Hallaqu, with Austin, and Goob, Frank, and 200. My […]
Hi,
I am new to this sight, but wanted to share just a bit to those who are considering suicide. As a bit of background, I am a nearly 60 woman with 4 grown kids and 3 grandkids, married to the same man for over 40 years, upper middle class, fairly attractive, intelligent, witty, talented and loved. But last year all hell broke lose…..
My first time in the hospital was in Dec 2011, I self checked in because I had become obsessive about suicide and was tempting fate with pills, a loaded gun, knife to wrist and other dangerous and fatal things and ideas. I didn’t REALLY want […]
I never planned to use a gun, CO poisioning was always my escape plan. I always thought drinking was why I was depressed, but since I stopped drinking, I started eating healthy and lost 30 lbs, but I still feel I’m not in control of my life, depressed, so I started drinking again. I have bought a few guns to prove to myself that I wouldn’t use them to end my life. I justify keeping one of them loaded in a locked box since my house has been broken into, but I know I like having that exit so close to me. It’s unlocked and right where I can […]
So my brother when to jail the other day he was trying to brake into cars and he was high and had a loaded gun.why tho e has everything he ever wanted. we loved him but all he did was hurt us. And on the other hand my boyfriend thinks I’m cheating don’t really wana be alive right now
Just wondering how many others have been on the edge of attempting, but just couldn’t take that last step. I’m not really talking about swallowing ten aspirin or other “attention getting” attempts, but the real thing.
I once stood on the roof of a high-rise building for two or three hours, but couldn’t make the jump. I’ve also held a loaded gun to my head for an hour or so, but couldn’t pull the trigger. I once got my car up to 100 MPH and was going to veer into a bridge, but couldn’t do that either.
I just wish the feeling of not wanting to exist […]
Today was a great day, celebrated my nephew’s birthday with family and friends. Now I’m home alone and all I can think about is how much I hate being alive. I am drinking knowing that it only makes things worse…but I can’t help it. It gives me the sense that my thoughts are just caused by the alcohol…that it’s not me…but I know the truth. I’m alone…there’s a loaded gun in my drawer. I think about how easy it is to just…
I love my family, I know they love me…I have everything I could ever want, but I don’t…can’t appreciate it all. I just […]
a serge to connect rushes through me
a time bomb with no clock showing
chains holding me down
my lips locked together
my heart trying to jump away from me too
my hand just out of reach for a loaded gun
out of reach like everything else in life
leave me with the waste
it’s the wrong time to be so cruel
i’ll just die here slowly
it’s ok though because i can’t eat anything
too weak to struggling anymore
let me die here slowely like i always thought i would
leave me with more of nothing
please
please
please
left alone again. why am i not use to this yet?! i mean, i should be by now. i dodn’t even know this person too well. what was so wrong with it? why did he thing it was so worng? to actually talk to someone. i have a bofriend. he has a girlfriend. i can sorta understand, and i respect his choice of not wanting to talk to me anymore. it just dosn’t make sence to me though. every single time i get to actually talk to somebody and feel comfortable about it. my life changes. it makes me happy to be able to do […]
I don’t even know where to start explaining this…for that matter I’m not even sure that I’m trying to explain something to begin with. Maybe I’m just trying to understand it. Maybe some part of my brain is hoping that if I string enough words together someone, somewhere, will be able to explain it all to me.
I don’t even know if I’m suicidal. I used to think that “suicidal” was something definitive. Something that you’d know if you were or you weren’t. It didn’t seem like the sort of thing you’d miss, you know? I suppose if someone asked me outright I’d say no, I’m […]
I have been there, too. many times. my best friend shot himself in July of ‘08. I’ve even had a loaded gun to my head in the past few months. if you need to talk to someone, contact me:
jacob.major@stu.oldham.kyschools.us (easiest)
MySpace.com
I can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel.
If you need someone, I am here!
     I have been there. too many times. my best friend shot himself in July of ’08. I’ve even had a loaded gun to my head in the past few months. if you need to talk to someone, contact me:
jacob.major@stu.oldham.kyschools.us (easiest)
MySpace.com
I can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel.
If you need someone, I am here!