After I lost my friend, I didn’t know what to do or who to turn to, I wound up joining the wrong crowd. I was always a little bit of a drinker, I mean I liked the taste. But I got a little too tipsy one night, and I wound up sleeping with this guy whose last name I still don’t even know. I wound up getting pregnant after that, but I tragically lost the baby before I could even tell anyone, including my family. I wound up spiraling down into depression and “cutting” and I was just in a funk. As soon as I […]
Tag:
Lost Friends
Whenever we’re little, why is it that we wish we were older? Much older? Why didn’t anyone warn us of this? The adult life is so sugar-coated and isn’t as glamorous as it’s made to be.We wasted out childhoods on wishing we were done with it, when in all actuality, we would give up anything just to go back.
I first tried to kill myself when I was fourteen, after 3 years of cutting. My parents split up, I lost my 8 day old nephew, my sisters moved out, I lost my friends, and I had nothing holding me back from suicide. I was put on […]
It’s been a long year.
Well, almost a year.
The last time I posted anything on here, I was in a semi-good place with my life and I was slowly getting stronger. The depression was lessening day by day and I was coming to realize that my life wasn’t really as bad as it could be.
I was on the road to recovery.
Since then, I feel like I’ve taken 5 steps forward and 10 steps back. That is why I am back here, to complain about the tiny little mishaps in my life, and some of the big ones. To let you- my beautiful online world of strangers […]
I am drowning in my depression.
I am unable to reach out to anyone, because I have no one to reach out to. I have lost what friends I had because I was “a bummer to be around.” I did what I could do mask my feelings, but I can’t, not anymore.
I am writing this not looking for sympathy, but to simply tell my story, and maybe, for once, I can be of some worth.
I was raised with one simple phrase beaten into my head, I am worthless. Whether I am or not, does not matter when that is the only thing you feel: worthless. I […]
I used to have the bestest friend ever. You know, like the one that lives in your neighborhood and you guys hangout everyday. This year, she started hanging out with one of my old friends named Jenna. I mean, I thought we could all hangout together bc that would be fun! But no, and I would realize too late that I was being replaced.
One day during a hurricane, me and my bestest friend went to my grandfathers house during a storm. Because of the storm, the power was out at both of our houses (so I took her to go to my grandfathers house to […]
Hi, my name is Josh and im currently a Senior in highschool. I have a problem…trouble making friends. Its hard to explain but im a very very friendly, loving, happy, and a peaceful guy. Thats just how I am…unfortunately deep inside I am a very sad, depressed and lonely person. I like to question things, even myself and i think this is what is leading to my downfall….when i was young i had only 2 friends…i could only be with one at a time and if it was all 3 of us i would get very jealous and depressed, remind you…i was VERY young when […]
I loved you, I loved you so so much, but I could just never tell you, I wanted to keep you as my friend and I tried, I tried so hard to keep my friend. I always try so hard with you and I just can’t do it anymore, you don’t understand how much it’s hurting me that you don’t even acknowledge the effort I make, it might not seem like much but it’s hard for me to just let go, but i’m trying but I just don’t even see why anymore babe. I’m sick of of you throwing me aside for what you consider […]
its my birthday. . and im all alone. . .no friends. . no love. . no nothing. . just me. .
im spending my birhtday on omegle and chatroulette. . . how big a loser could i be. . ? i lost everything. . .
i lost my love. . i lost my mind. . i lost my integrity. . i lost my tears. . i lost time. . i lost my friends. .
only two people have wished my on my birthday till yet. . only two people. . only two . . . =) its 1:40 am on the 5th of Jan here . . im […]
I had not felt like this in so long. i haven’t been eating or sleeping i try to make myself happy but its not working. I cant find a job. I feel like I have lost all my friends. I fell in love with my best friend but she doesn’t know it. Currently we are in an argument and she decided to stop talking to me. Consequently she’s been spending more time with her friend who likes her. She said I hurt her with our argument and is not sure if she wants to see me again. I feel like everyone I’ve ever fallen in […]
I’m not suicidal, even though I have been in the past, but I want every one reading this to know they matter and that there are people around you who care and love you.
I lost one of my best friends just a week ago to suicide. He was depressed and under extreme pressure in his academic and social life. He didn’t believe that the girl he had been in love with for four years had any interest in him and that he was too dependent on her. She didn’t tell him while he was alive, but she loves him and thought that he deserved more […]
My name is Elizabeth. I am 14 years old, and I’ve wished for death for a couple of years, and I’m certain it is the only thing I’ll be able to succeed in this life; I’ve tried not to think about it, but it always comes back. In moments when I’m lonely and when it’s silent, I’ll think of death and how to achieve it. I wish I was normal, that I didn’t have these thoughts. I wish I could have changed the way my mind works, and how it always tells me to ruin things. I’ve lied to everyone I’ve talked to, I’ve insulted […]
Tired of everything!! 4 years ago my life was great had friends a home and finances were good but then parents lost their jobs. Lost my home, my friends and my self respect……. Ever since then I have moved a total of 6 times and each time the reason for moving again is because of the shortage of money. I was kicked out of school because we couldn’t afford it and missed out 2 years of education, now I back at school trying my best and I can cope with any of it, I’m failing at every corner!! One good thing happened to me……..one year […]
Well, I’ve been gone for a while now haven’t I? I’ve been through hell and back and I haven’t found what I’ve been trying to look for. . .
As the people who read my other posts may know, I was with a guy who I loved with all my heart and I gave up almost everything for him. He ended up cheating on me and using me for sex. . . And I still love him alot. But no where near enough to go through that again. The day after he was caught cheating and shit, I posted it to The Suicide Project. I never really […]
You read the stories of people suffering and slowly dying. You hear the words of being told a person is dead over and over again in your dreams. You see everyone you know around you dying suddenly without signs. You cry every night when you remember them living. You beg God to somehow bring them back to you and alive again. You feel the presence of your lost friends at your side all the time. You replay the scenes of their death over and over again. You spend hours memorizing facts about the people you lost. You reread your last message or recall your last […]
“And I swear at that moment, we were infinite”
Is my favorite quote from my favorite book Perks of being a wallflower.
I must have read that book a thousand times, it always use to help me when I felt down, and I had a lot of favorite quotes from the book, that’s my absolute favorite, because I think we’ve all felt infinite at one point or another.
One time I felt like that, is on Halloween when I was really little and I was trick or treating, and I saw the moon and it was big and full and I couldn’t stop staring at it because I thought it […]