Hi..i’m a 16 year old girl and i really don’t know where to begin..
but I will begin by saying i’m suicidal and under a lot of depression…
the cutting has temporarily stopped, but when I get the urge to do it..nothing can stop me.. I will cut myself with anything and everything…
i used bobby pins, box cutters, scissors, knives, plastic, dried up paint, rocks, needles, safety pins…you name it ; I’ve used it..
I had to undergo therapy for it when my mom finally noticed..but it’s all a bunch of bullshit..
nobody really cares if you’re alive or not. and once you die, […]
Tag:
Needles
” What’s the use of a title”
They don’t make it
the beautiful die in flame-
suicide pills, rat poison, rope what-
ever…
they rip their arms off,
throw themselves out of windows,
they pull their eyes out of the sockets,
reject love
reject hate
reject, reject.
they don’t make it
the beautiful can’t endure,
they are butterflies
they are doves
they are sparrows,
they don’t make it.
one tall shot of flame
while the old men play checkers in the park
one flame, one good flame
while the old men play checkers in the park
in the sun.
the beautiful are found in the edge of a room
When I was 8 year old, I thought I was living a perfect life. I had both parents living with me. I had a older brother and older sister who took good care of me. I thought everything was going alright… I now know what a lie I was living.
My Dad was a alcoholic. My siblings tried their hardest to hide this fact from me. It worked and I didn’t know much about my Dad. I only knew that he comes home from work at night to sleep which was a lie. He was unemployed. He came home every night to take my brothers money. […]
The injection of religion
Has a comalike effect
And the bodies
They lie in decay
Dreaming of greener days
Open eyes reading nothing
A sky harsh blue grins black
A sky harsh blue grins black
Grinding binding taking away
Needles above the prey
Wreath of barbs
Hi! Now, let me start off by saying that I am not full of the same deep-seated depression as many of you are.
My family loves me, I was never molested, I haven’t even cut myself. But I still want to commit suicide.
Not now, not even tomorrow. But upon reaching a certain age, I have not decided upon the age yet – it may be 60 or 70 even. But I will do it.
I know what you’re thinking -Â Well, if he’s got a good life, why would he kill himself? That’s just plain selfish!
But the thing is, I’m Asexual. I won’t ever have a wife to […]
half poem half rant.
I asked for one night
Just one night where I could show you my pain
To explain myself, to apologize for the way I’ve been
But you wouldn’t give me that
Not that one single piece of reconciliation
You feel so high and mighty
On that pedestal you’ve placed yourself upon
With my best friends tongue down your throat
You said it yourself.
 I can’t be fixed.
So I’m done trying. I’m done caring. I’m done feeling. I’m done living.
Maybe ill fail once more, end up in a hospital bed somewhere with needles in my arm
But maybe for once in my life I won’t fuck something up and this time not wake […]
Everything is easier if you just stop caring, right? It’s easier if you just are alone as often as possible, right?
Then why do I still care? Why do I still check on a daily basis, to make sure my friend didn’t just go. It’s been about 5 days since he last posted. Ususally I wouldn’t be this worried, but his friend just took her own life and I can’t text him to make sure.And  I don’t know why I am suddenly thinking of all of this now. I am a wreck.
I’ve been thinking about it lately. Too much. How easy it would be to […]
This is a sad story of a now 26 year old man who was “Left Behind” by everyone. I am sorry, it is a bit long, but I respectfully put it all in one post. If you have these same problems, read this. Especially if you are currently in school.
For those of you who don’t know, I have Depression, Social Anxiety Disorder, and ADD. This story revolves around how I believe that the public schools I went to are responsible for plaguing me with this third disorder – which doesn’t help the depression one bit.
Way back in grade school (jk-grade6) I was having issues with ADD. So […]
I did have a different title – which was funny – but I forgot. Oh well.
My name is “kthx” (for privacy reasons). I am a 26 year old Male, plagued with three conditions (that we know of so far) which are Major Depressive Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, and A.D.D. (ADHD minus the hyper component). I was diagnosed with the ADD and depression as a child. I have lived ever since then in a depressed state. I always have a low mood (dysthymia), and things never seem to work out for me.
I have been through so many psychiatrists and psychologists offices throughout my life and not one of […]
I am 16 years old. I am not welcome into my own home. I have always been an outcast my whole life. I’m a freshmen.
I play sousaphone in marching band.
I am on depression, anxiety and scizo meds.
My best friend got in a car wreck and died.
My mom tells me I’m useless, I’m nothing.
I write poems. I’m put down for them.
a total of 10 friends of mine have killed themselves.
I’m too fat to eat…I’m 197 pounds. I don’t eat.
I cut myself a lot. I have tried suicide.
And i have a therapist. She doesnt help.
i am […]
to cut, i did yesterday, not severley as i was some-what busy and didnt have time to slip away for an hour. but now i have the dark night, and the urge is back. i hate knowing i cut at the same time, glad i have my own free counselors: my needles and pocket knives. they r always there for me.
The thing about my sister, is that she is mean. Not only that, but she doesn’t realize that when she tells people these mean, horrible things, that they are affected by it. That what she says to me, makes me feel worse about myself. How many times have I cut myself over things she said or did to me? Too many. How many pills did I try to overdose on, July 1 2010? Over 40. That same year, I overdosed again on August 23. The second Monday in school. That same year, months earlier, I tied together a bunch of knee high socks, and tried […]
Ten years ago
We were both fifteen. Teenagers. Too old to be called children, and barely old enough to be called teens. Too old to be taken care of, but too young to get many freedoms. Lost, reckless and confused, much like the majority of our age group. Except for one tiny difference: we were being held in a school for emotionally unstable teens.
Neither of us thought there was anything wrong with ourselves, but apparently the rest of the world disagreed. We were both there for the same reason, which was cutting and repeated suicide attempts. Nothing some special school could fix; just a bit of […]
Time does not run in seconds, hours or days. For me it runs in nights. I wake up as the sun sets, eat dinner for breakfast, and say goodnight to my loved ones. Alone I sit through the endless nights, watching time fly by, wondering why the sun is rising before I’ve had the chance to live. As the first rays of dawn pierce my aching eyes, I begin to prepare for my journey into the dreamworld. The only place where I can truly live in vivid and terrifying detail. Nights pass by, one after the other, most of which I cannot remember. Vague images […]
The start of my first “rant”,
Hm I’m not to good at typing things up about my problems but I’m even worse at trying to talk about them, so here this goes!
First off I just wanted to say please do not judge me or think of me as a horrible person for these disgusting facts I will probably type out,
Appreciated.
Well, for most of my life it’s been pretty hard on my family (mum & dad) especially after my sister was born it just got harder, it’s seemed like they have always struggled with money really bad.
My dad used to work away up […]
I wrote a post sometime last week. I am not sure of the date as it was mostly a blur.  The time came again. Last Tuesday at 5pm after countless minutes/hours/days/weeks etc etc of wondering if suicide was what I want, I tried to commit suicide for the third time. I popped a hell of a lot of panadol, drank some vodka and cut my wrist (again). This time I was going to be successful, I was bleeding everywhere (I had hit a vein) and I was slowly passing out. It was getting harder and harder to keep my eyes open. Then much to my disgust my mother […]
I am a 17 year old girl and I found this website while seeking least painful methods of suicide on Google.
If I had half an ounce of courage in my veins, I would damn painlessness and go out messily: off the edge of a building of with a bullet to the temple. I am, however, extraordinarily cowardly when it comes to agony. I would be inclined towards an overdose, but I hear that’s a horrible way to go – vomitting. I would inject some air into a vein, but where would I get the syringe? And I’m no fan of needles… In short, the recurrent […]
I try to remember why I wanted to kill myself. I don’t know. I can’t recall, but somehow I still know why I want to be out of this “reality”. Sometimes I wish I was in an empty space, where I can hear nothing, not even a sound, not even me breathing, nothing at all.
I was 12. It was long ago now. I wanted to die, but i never found the courage enough, then this person cae to me, she helped me a lot, and I don’t even remember what she looked like. I felt I was I love with her, she took care of […]