Ok, I’ve never expressed myself like this before but I have nobody else to turn to. I am a 35 year old man whose partner left 5 weeks ago. I had a 19 year habit with cannabis, something I have given up since my partner left because it caused me to rage in uncontrollable ways. So would never physically harm her but the mental torture I must have put her through was intense. I don’t even know why. Now after 5 weeks off it I haven’t had one money of madness and feel good about that but there is one problem. She won’t speak to […]
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Old Man
I am a 27 year old man. I am writing this because I don’t know what else to do. I am sorry if this is extremely long but I feel as though I just have to get this out of me. I will understand if no one were to read this.
I often feel hopeless about everything in my life. As a child I grew up in a small town North of a major city. I had friends, played lots of sports but often felt like an outcast for no reason in particular. I would often become very angry if anyone rubbed me the wrong way. […]
I wish I could get this feeling away from me but suicide pops into my head all day. I’m 21 years old and feel like I have already lived enough. I’m drained. I sit here now typing this in my bed n don’t even have the energy to pick my head up off the pillow. And I did nothing today. Like I do everyday. But suicide seems so nice right now. Like all this stress and sadness gone in a minute. Â But what’s so hard about it is I don’t want to die. When I think about it I just think of my mom n […]
I thought I was okay. I did I promise you you have to believe me this time i thought i was back to… well not ‘okay’ but stable. definitely stable. Exams and yet another unrequited love and everything and I saw an old man walking in the street and he was walking but he seemed so tired and old and he was stumbling and I started screaming in my head and I had to dig my nails into my arms to stop the throbbing in my mind it won’t stop make it stop make it stop please I can’t I don’t want to end up […]
I am 26, male. Let me preface this by saying that I am relatively intelligent (B.S. Physics), relatively attractive, and from the outside, it appears that my life is going well. All is not well. I have struggled with depression for over a decade now and sometimes it feels like I am smart enough to out-think it, beat it, but it always comes back to haunt me.
I have thought of all the possibilities, I wish I could hand my life off to someone more deserving. I should be happy! I have a stable job, a great roommate, and vitality that […]
Why is it now that I am faced with my past and what I have done? Why couldn’t it have happened earlier or later? I was already in a state of some sort of depression, and now this? I don’t understand, and I am now carrying the famous ‘ball and chain’ my father has spoken of many times in the past. I have set my goals and made plans, but I thought that’s all there was to it, besides the occasional struggle (people judging you, speaking against you, blah blah blah). I thought that people around me would be my struggle on the path to […]
I’ve told you her story now I’ll tell you mine. I’m Angel and I’m 13, I’ve gone through so much though so don’t judge me on my age. I’ve been raped and beaten, I’ve been hated on and abused, both physically and mental, I’m suicidal and IÂ cut. I’ve gone through so much and I don’t understand why I’m here anymore. Why do I have to live on this earth full of haters? Anyway, when I was 10 I was put up for adoption and I was taken in by a family in Louisiana. They were okay, for the first week. They had 5 other kids […]
I do not know really how long I have been coming here to this website. The archive only goes back to Tuesday Feb 1st, 2011.. I have read a good lot here, I have read a lot of peoples stories. Some are very interesting, some are rather not. I may have posted things here, not quite clear. I don’t think so.
I am a 38 year old man. I turn 39 this May. I doubt I will make it to 40 regardless. I first started in therapy when I was 20 or so, I was still in the Navy then, it was a Navy psychiatrist. I […]
im only 16 i am no one to tell a 30 year old man how to live his life. i feel really bad for the things that have happen to u and u say u dont want to die but u dont wanna live. i dont want to sound rude and i guess i have never been in real life but i have felt the pain i am a really big bible girl now i believe that when u truly want to get better and pray god will meet ur hard work half way. if u go to a church and start getting a better […]
So i found the hand gun i knew the old man had. im not into guns cause i have morals against them so i dont work them well but i know it well enough to shoot. so i cocked the gun and couldnt figure out how to fix it without shooting it so i had to take it outside and shoot it. powerful little thing. crush my skull good! so ive been really thinking about using it to end my life soon. but i guess im scared to do it. i dont know why. i cant find anything worth staying alive for. being dead sounds […]
After reading one_day’s post the other day about the person on this site going by the name nolentwohundred (37m) having and inappropriate relationship with another member madetofade (15f) I took the time to investigate for myself through their various posts whether or not this allegation had any merit. I must say personally i found the whole thing to be very disturbing on multiple levels. The fact that a 37 year old man is using a suicide forum to spout his personal political,social,religious views in a blatant attempt to try and attract and influence vulnerable (underage) woman is just wrong and possibly even illegal. […]
I’ve received most of my exam results & its good enough for me. But it will never be good enough for father, so I haven’t shown him yet. I’ve given it all I can, but I know he will still not be satisfied with it! Lately I’ve been staying at the library late to do better in this essay, because I know that it HAAASS TO BE better than the last.
The old man hasn’t been speaking to me lately, and I know that something is cooking in that head of his. I just found out that he thinks I’ve been out and about NOT at […]
This is a sad story of a now 26 year old man who was “Left Behind” by everyone. I am sorry, it is a bit long, but I respectfully put it all in one post. If you have these same problems, read this. Especially if you are currently in school.
For those of you who don’t know, I have Depression, Social Anxiety Disorder, and ADD. This story revolves around how I believe that the public schools I went to are responsible for plaguing me with this third disorder – which doesn’t help the depression one bit.
Way back in grade school (jk-grade6) I was having issues with ADD. So […]
I will try to be brief, Tomorrow I go to work to be fired. I will lose everything, my house, wife and son because like many we live paycheck to paycheck. I am old 59 and no one will hire me at this age. I continue to ruin my life and have done so at times. Each time I reach some level of success, I find some way to mess up. Well in the end when all the stuff hits the fan – I will have lost again. I am thinking about ending it. Your comments are appreciated
Old Man J
I consider myself fairly reasonable, but lately I’ve been contemplating suicide more and more. I am a twenty-three year old man living at his mom’s house. My mom suffers serious emotional problems after my dad died in 2001. She is a good parent, and I am well taken care of at home. Our family even has a fair amount of money. Things could be worse; however, her emotional problems have become aggravated since I graduated college and returned home in December. Even though my full-time job keeps me out of the house for a majority of the day, my mere presence triggers obsessive behavior in […]
I’m a 24 year old man who has had breasts (gynecomastia) since I was 10.
My health has been slowly deteriorating and have many un-diagnosed health problems.
I’ll probably be dead by 30 due to these ‘natural’ causes.
I was born into poverty to foolish parents and no family support.
At this point in life, I tend to focus on the negatives in every person and thing.
My depression makes me want to help others who are also feeling depressed because I know how horrible it is.
Your life is valuable, so don’t throw it away when you can use it to help other people, which is the purpose of […]
I never understood why people write letters before killing themselves. It always seemed sort of unnecessary and selfish to put the ones that stay under a letter apologizing why they did what they did because why did they do it in the first place? So I never understood why, until now. They write because it’s the last goodbye, it’s their last attempt to say they love who’s staying and they are sorry they couldn’t find a way out… They know it’s gonna hurt who’s reading it, they do, but they have to write it. It’s like when an old man decides to reveal his last […]
Don’t you hate it when you take a dump and ur dick falls asleep along with ur leg? Happenes to me all the time, probably poor blood circulation for a 17 year old…
I wrote this 3 days ago and since wordpress doesn’t let me write on my iphone without lag, I just copy and paste it which is easier.
My dad pissed me off a bit. Between the facts I know and the facts he knows, we are both ignorant of each other. I tell him what I heard and he tells me that he’s older and therefore he has all the brains and […]
im a 39 year old man with no life, no wife and no future.
i just tried to hang myself and failed. why do i feel this way
all the time. did finding my mom in a field with a bottle of
pills do this to me. nobody cares anyway. is it because i
drink like my dad did. i miss mom and dad so much. now
that they are gone i feel so alone all the time. no one
knows how hard it was growing up with a suicidel mother
and a drunk father, but in the end i still loved them. i try to
drink to kill the pain, but always […]
I have attempted suicide twice. Once by hanging and once by pills and alcohol.
Both times I saw it as the only way to end the pain of being alive, of living my life, with my thoughts and my ideas of my future.
And both times I was radically incorrect about how my life would turn out. As I write this I am only now aware of that. I was so totally wrong about how things would play out for me, of all the joys and experiences I would have, of the love I would feel, of the ups that would somehow manifest themselves. If I had […]
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